Has anyone needed therapy?

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memory
memory Member Posts: 106
edited June 2014 in Managing Side Effects of Breast Cancer and Its Treatment

By therapy I mean the talking kind.

I finished active treatment the end of October. Right now, I feel like I'm ready to explode. By "explode" I don't mean violent. I just mean anger, frustration. I've tried very hard not to take it out on anybody else. It's probably just impacting ME. And I don't think it's just the chemicals, the physical effects.

I went through some other things before cancer. It was just the icing on the cake. I actually feel very good for the first time in ages; now that I've made this decision. I'm a doer, and I like to feel like I'm working towards something. I'm going to take my time, find someone I feel comfortable with and who takes my insurance (VERY important.)

I would like to know if any of you ladies have had counseling after breast cancer.  Any advice? Was it helpful? 

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  • jancie
    jancie Member Posts: 2,631
    edited February 2011

    I finished treatment Sept 2009.  By March of 2010 I was in weekly therapy and still am.

    I have tried 3 different types of AD meds but nothing has worked other than Diazepam and Lorazepam for anxiety attacks.

    Luckily my therapist is also a BC survivor.  Although our treatments were so different, she gets the "cancer thing".  I have decreased my visits from 4x a month to 3x a month.  I am hoping in 6 months I can just go every other week.

    I have also been a member of a BC support group that meets twice monthly.

    I am so glad I am in therapy!

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  • memory
    memory Member Posts: 106
    edited February 2011

    I'm glad to hear someone else had a delayed reaction. I thought I was doing great, then all of a sudden, bang!

    I'd have to say it started in late October, then kept getting worse. I've always been the Lone Ranger type, guess I've got to give those ways up.

     Thanks for writing, Jancie!

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  • dlb823
    dlb823 Member Posts: 9,430
    edited February 2011

    memory, I think the emotional aftermath of a bc dx & tx is so under emphasized and so many women just suffer because they think they should be happy now and getting back to normal.  I didn't seek counseling, but both of the cancer centers where I was treated had psychologists available to talk to, and luckily, one of them had warned me that when we finish tx a lot of suppressed emotions would arise, along with adjustment challenges.  I also saw a flyer for a weekend seminar just for post-tx patients.  And even though I didn't go to it (I was still in tx), just knowing it was that big of an issue to devote an entire weekend to it helped me anticipate and deal with some of the emotions you're describing.

    I walk a lot, and I've found it's not only great exercise but an ideal way to think through the anger, frustration and other emotions.  And BCO has been my group therapy.  But by all means, look into counseling if you feel you could benefit from it.  As jancie suggested, just be sure that you find someone who has specific experience with breast cancer patients.  A psychologist @ UCLA warned me that you don't want to use someone to whom you have to explain bc lingo and tx experiences.  You want someone who intimately understands our path and our fears.   

    Good luck, and please let us know if you find someone and how it goes.  (((Hugs)))  Deanna

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  • memory
    memory Member Posts: 106
    edited February 2011

    Thank you for the warm words, Deanna. You and Jancie are right; I need to look for someone with knowledge of breast cancer issues.

    I just realized, there is a breast cancer support group at our local cancer resource center. I was never able to go, because of scheduling conflicts, but I think next month I'll check it out.

    Thanks again.

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  • momand2kids
    momand2kids Member Posts: 1,508
    edited February 2011

    yes,yes and more yes.  I had a therapist who I was seeing for some other family issues-- then bc hit and everything got wiped off the radar.  Turns out, she mostly saw women who had bc..... so she walked through the entire experience with me..... made such a difference-I was able to talk about all the things I was afraid of with someone who really understood it.  I saw her every other week while I was in treatment- and for quite a while afterwards--1 or 2 times per month.. haven't seen her for a while now--- probably over 6 months--but it really, really helped at the time...... I highly recommend it.

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited August 2012

    I don't know how anyone gets through this without it.  YES, YES, YES - it is so difficult when the biggest part of treatment ends - and that's when the real WORK of coping hits!  Please be gentle with yourself and find a well qualifed therapist to talk with.  Your hospital will have a social worker on staff, maybe she can suggest someone.

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  • mdg
    mdg Member Posts: 3,571
    edited February 2011

    I am still dealing with BC and plan to start counseling now.  I want to work through all of this so I can move on when my treatment is done.  I think it is a good idea.  We are all going through so much or have been through so much and many of the things we think and feel we can't always express to others. It's hard to go through something like this and just move on.  I think counseling would be helpful.  Good luck and I am glad you are done with treatment....I am jealous!  I still have a long way to go.  Best of luck to you! 

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  • jancie
    jancie Member Posts: 2,631
    edited February 2011

    Memory - sometimes the delayed reaction is that we so want to get back to the normal we were before BC and the realization hits that now we feel like we are 80 years old due to chemically induced menopause (for those that had to go through chemo and had not gone through menopause), add the weight gain and the Tamoxifen to get rid of those nasty hormones.  We don't think we will ever get to that place pre-cancer again and physically I am unable to so I have resigned myself to accept this although I have fought it every step of the way.

    Our families don't understand why we are different even though treatments have ended.  They don't understand the lasting physical and emotional effects of BC treatment.  We don't have the energy we had before, we have fears swimming through our heads, I could go on and on and on.

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  • Fearless_One
    Fearless_One Member Posts: 3,300
    edited February 2011

    I wanted to seek professional counseling, not sure why I didn't.   Just was overwhelmed, I guess.

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  • mrsnjband
    mrsnjband Member Posts: 1,409
    edited February 2011

    About a year & a half after diagnosis I hit the wall.  I was very angry & would explode over little things. With some couseling & the right meds for depression I am doing so much better now.  NJ 

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  • Fearless_One
    Fearless_One Member Posts: 3,300
    edited February 2011

    Mrsnjband, that is interesting - it's been exactly that long for me and lately I feel as if I am about to lose it.....

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  • karen333
    karen333 Member Posts: 3,697
    edited February 2011

    It is a year and a half for me also, I have a therapist and am on meds for depression and anxiety.  I don't know how I would have made it through the coping with the Dx and Tx without him.  Plus every day problems that come up in "normal" life.  Initially I had sessions once a week, now I see him every 3 weeks.  I also count the support I get from my sisters here.

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  • Fearless_One
    Fearless_One Member Posts: 3,300
    edited February 2011

    Maybe I should go on meds, too.   I was trying to avoid it, but seems to be getting worse.

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  • karen333
    karen333 Member Posts: 3,697
    edited February 2011

    Fearless_One, Your diagnosis date, stage are the same as mine.  Mine was not detected by mammo but by self-exam too, that is really ironic.  While the meds work, I think teamed with talk therapy they really work more potently.

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  • Fearless_One
    Fearless_One Member Posts: 3,300
    edited February 2011

    Karen, may I ask what meds?   The only thing I was ever on was prozac (the generic), but that was a long time ago.   Not sure how that would go with Arimidex......?   

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  • karen333
    karen333 Member Posts: 3,697
    edited February 2011

    Fearless-One, I sent you a PM, feelfree to Pm me,  Karen

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  • Tammy65
    Tammy65 Member Posts: 38
    edited February 2011

    I have been seeing a therapist for anxiety issues previous to my diagnosis,....then the BC happened ( i was diagnosed in dec 2010)...and I am planning on continuing to see her through out my treatment..she has been a tremendous support to me so far through all of this....

    it really has helped me a lot

    good luck...Tammy :) 

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  • memory
    memory Member Posts: 106
    edited February 2011

    Thank you so much, everyone who responded. I'm very humbled by your willingness to share.

     Those ladies who felt like they "hit the wall" about a year after diagnosis; my diagnosis was just under seventeen months ago. Interesting coincidence. You'd think they'd tell us these things . . . well, off I go, hopefully to find someone this week, if not next week.

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  • cocomoran
    cocomoran Member Posts: 5
    edited October 2011

    Hit the wall and still hanging seven years after treatment if you have any access to therapy get some and hopefully someone who has been through breast cancer much easier to relate

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  • Miles2Go
    Miles2Go Member Posts: 120
    edited October 2011

    Absolutely, Yes! ! ! We all need therapy for breast cancer is a significantly emotional event in our lives, and that of everyone we know.  Everybody is on their own individual roller coaster.  Talk and listen to people you trust (avoid those you do not trust).  A good licensed clinical social worker is worthwhile.  If your church has a Stephen Minister Program, apply for your very own Stephen Minister.  Understand living with a history of breast cancer is a process, not a destination (sorry for the cliche; it's true).  Nuture yourself, ask for what you need, and above all make up your mind to gather your courage and heal while remembering to breathe.  "You too have promises to keep and miles to go" (Robert Frost poem). 

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  • Shirlann
    Shirlann Member Posts: 3,302
    edited October 2011

    What we all need to know is that this whole experience is PTSD!!!!  Why we are not told this, or at least warned that having your life in the balance and then when treatment is over, there is no "you"ll be fine now", just, "good luck" is so devastating.  Get thee to a psychiatrist, and if needed, get on anti-depressants.

    I get mad at the apparent complete unconcern by any medical professional about the aftereffects of this ghastly diagnosis, really ticks me off.

    Gentle hugs, Shirlann 

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  • Morgan513
    Morgan513 Member Posts: 664
    edited October 2011

    Shirlann,

    I couldn't agree with you more!  

    Lorrie 

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  • lisaelder1972
    lisaelder1972 Member Posts: 171
    edited October 2011

    I held up pretty well through bilateral mastectomy,chemo,Herceptin but soon as I finished I had a breakdown and had to actually be at an inpatient psych hospital for 11 days.My oncologist said they see quite a bit of this since we fight so hard to get through and then when it's over we actually have time to think.I have had to be inpatient  3 more times since 2006.I can't get over the anger.I was only 33 years old and ended up 100% disabled on Social Security.I live with chronic pain every single day and I forget everything.Don't get me wrong I am glad that I'm still here with my family but sometimes the suffering just overwhelms me.

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