I was just diagnosed this morning

Mindy,

Your feelings are so normal. I worry about my 18 year old high functioning autistic boy on a daily basis and hope everything turns out ok.

Do yourself a favor, I learned this from a counsellor, as much as your mind wanders into the worst case scenarios, snap it back and think of positive things. I didn't think it possible but I am able to do it now.

Also, the best advice that I was give by my oncologist and breast surgeon is to not dig too deeply into the Internet on your condition and think the info you are getting is all correct. A lot of what's out there for you to read is old stats and there are a lot of treatments now that weren't available back then.

Dear Mindy:

Welcome! None of us want to be in this club but you have chosen well when posting on these forums.  The sistas here are the BEST!!! You will gain alot of knowledge from here that will be helpful in your journey, and yes, it is a journey.

First...breathe!!!

You have to wrap your head around this for it is all consuming in the beginning.  Once you have your official diagnosis and have a plan it will be easier.

My advice is to take your DH or someone with you to all appointments (or bring a tape recorder). Take notes, ask questions! Get a 2nd opinion.

We are all here for you and will offer all the support and encouragement you will need.

((((((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))))))))

Jan

Dear Mindy.  You will feel like that for a while but eventually you will come to terms with it.  This is a great site for support, information and courage.  It is funny how we seem to worry more about those around us than ourselves.  I too felt the same.  It's really helpful to talk about it and we're here for you.  Blessings to you!

 RegalBeagle

Mindy - I think everyone here would agree that those first few weeks after diagnosis are just about the worst part of the entire breast cancer journey. Once you meet with doctors and get a "game plan" in place, it really gets a lot better. 

I second what everyone has said about taking someone with you to all appointments to take notes as you get more information and weigh your options.  My husband and I would write down all the questions we had ahead of time - then during our visits he'd take notes on everything the doctors said, then before the visit was over, my husband would review the list of questions to make sure everyone of them had been answered at some point during the visit.  

It looks like Esther has given you some excellent resources about talking with your kids - I don't have kids so I didn't have to deal with that part of it.

Also, I would strongly urge you to get a consultation at your nearest NCI-desiginated cancer center, preferably one with a Breast Center.  A lot of the major university hospitals are NCI centers.  There is a world of difference between a general surgeon who might operate on a leg one day and a breast the next day and the doctors at a Breast Center who deal with nothing but breast cancer all day every day. Even if you don't get your actual treatment at a Cancer Center, getting a second opinion consultation at such a center will help you learn about your options and help you become an educated patient.  Here's a link to the Cancer Center search on the NCI site: http://www.cancer.gov/cancertopics/factsheet/NCI/cancer-centers   Most of these centers give expedited appointments to newly-diagnosed patients.

Good luck - it really does get better as you go along.  

Finally, take a deep breath.  While this all seems very urgent to you now, chances are that the cancer has been there for months if not years, so you have time to take a few weeks to do your research, get second and even third opinions, before making your treatment decisions.  Don't feel that you have to rush into any decisions before you're comfortable.  

Brooks6331: 

Sorry to hear you had to join us, but you have come to a haven that will supply you with all you need - educational as well as emotional.  This is the hardest time for you - right now, but it will get easier and somewhat less frightening.  You have a good prognosis, so I am sure, once everything has fallen into place, you will conquer this!  Keep us posted on your progress, we all care and are here for you too.

Linda

Mindy and Nancy:  My heart goes out to both of you and your families.  What a very difficult thing to have to tell loved ones. 

As the other ladies indicated above, we're here to help you deal with this, so feel free to vent and ask questions.

{{{HUGS}}}

Julie

brooks6331:  I'm sorry you were diagnosed with this.  Good luck with your appointment next week.

Julie