I Come to the Garden...

That's a real tough one Meece. Like they chose her over you. My family tried to keep in touch with my EX when we split and after a couple of years I put my foot down. I said if the kids are involved then he could be there, but not for just private dinners and stuff!

Wow Meece.  I applaud you.  You are so strong to put up with all of this.  I dread getting together with relatives for a Holiday gathering and you are going through this.  I should take lessons from you.  How do you deal with the hurt and pain of this?  Other then try to turn it over to God which is sometimes the only thing I think we can do. 

I think everything is super sensitive with me because of being in the middle of the fight with breast cancer and chemo right now but there has been real neglect and stupidity by people who I thought would have and they actually should have, been here for me.  My husband is upset about a lot of it too and we are trying to deal with so much with the breast cancer and his health issues and we can't understand people.  It turns a person bitter.  I am so proud of you for taking the high road with your in-laws Meece.  I don't think I could after this breast cancer experience.

I've got the Sounds Of The Season music channel on the TV and am getting ready to wrap presents.  I've been dragging my feet on this for a while now.  Not in the mood but it has to be done and when I get it done then it will be behind me.  It hurts my heart to love my Jesus so much but am hanging on until Dec. 26 when this "season" will all be over with for another year.  In-laws and extended family has caused so much hurt and pain for me that I just want it over with.  I think we will go to one of my sisters Christmas Day and that will be the one bright spot.  I know my blood relatives love me and hope for me to survive and never get cancer again.

I actually had a life long friend call yesterday (she hasn't called since I told her I had breast cancer 6 months ago) and she actually yelled at me over the phone because of my treatment plan and because I don't call her.  My husband says people are stupid to think it is my place to call them to tell them how I am when instead they should be calling me to see how I am and if I need anything.  She swore at me about how much chemo I'm having and she yelled at me how stupid it was for me to have 6 1/2 weeks of radiation and said they were taking advantage of me and it was stupid for me to let them do that much radiation.  I told her it was standard course of treatment for the surgical procedure I had.  I've explained it to her all in letters but she doesn't get it.  My husband hit the roof and said for me not to talk to her again.  This is only one example of the stress I've been dealing with for a long time now.  I just hope it isn't causing the cancer to get a new foothold before I even get this treatment over with.  I don't know how to shut it off short of never answering the phone or telling people to leave me alone.  Then when I do that and turn inward to try to preserve my health and mental health, my daughter in law criticizes me for "isolating" myself.            

{{{{{{{{ Juanita and Mecce }}}}}}}}}}}}

Meece,

My D-I-L has NEVER taken me out for a girls day out.  I've hinted at doing something together, but no, nothing happens other then she criticizes me for participating with my support groups and she tells me that those online groups can't give you a hug or take you out to lunch as a distraction???  She's never hugged me since the diagnosis in June or asked me out to any activity, let alone lunch.  I did tell her that no one had offered me a hug or asked me out to lunch!!  But it didn't register or something.  My DH said he felt her thoughts on it were someone should as long as she didn't have to be the one to do it.  Whatever.  I don't care anymore.  I'm almost to the point of not caring about anything.  If others don't care about me and my outcome in all of this then why should I??  She has said she loves me but there is no signs or followup that she does.  I didn't expect a lot of her time (hers is the grand daughter I kept for 2 1/2 years, 5 days a week) and now I don't expect any of it.  I DON'T CARE ANYMORE!!!!!  There is to much pain and hurt in caring and only God can help me now.  I have the surety of knowing without a doubt that God cares and God loves me. 

((((((((((((((Meece)))))))))))))))

{{{{{{{{{{{{{{Meece}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}

[[[[[[[[[[[[[[Meece]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]

That is every variation on a hug I can think of.

Sweet, dear woman, be very wary of all of this adding up.

Know that we are here, praying and caring about you in the midst of this tilt-o-whirl chapter.

Please, please, please take good care of yourself.

Do you have some sort of prescription for anti-anxiety? That would help shore me up in such a multi-facted time of multiple concerns.

Do breathe........ often, and repeatitively.

xx00xx00xx00xx00xx

I also like the bumper sticker, "I have resigned as general contractor of the Universe."

God will make all things work together for good. In the mean time, help him out, by taking good care of yourself. We need you around here -- in excellant shape.

((((((((((((Meece))))))))))) I was just reading your posts, prayers coming from Massachusetts.

Quick Recovery for Matt.

♥

(((Meece and Matt)))) You are both in my prayers tonight.

Praying for this situation.  The Pastor stayed until 2 am, but they wouldn't let him in the back as there were 3 of Matt's leadership there.  At 2 am they told the pastor they were going to hold him for 24 hours and the results were pending on the tests they ran.  Praise the Lord as Faith said, HE is in control and will work it all out!  Keep hanging on!!

Yes Meece he does.

What a relief you were able to talk to him and hear his voice.

God Bless The Children.

now you wait and see what needs to be done.

Matt (my nephew) is in good hands. I like the idea of being an Auntie.

Peace

♥