Starting Chemo April 2009
Comments
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Wow, I think this is the longest that I remember it being so quiet on this board. Hope evryone is ok, and just busy with work, life, and good things.
Judy - I felt about 80 yrs old after the walk - Ouch! My hips were the worst, but each day better - thankfully the walk is only once a year. I don't think I could do it more often than that!
Sending you all good thoughts....and Lena, let us know how things are going.
Geri
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Geri..but..that is a good pain isn't it? I like feeling the pain because it is due to something good for you...not like the pain from taxol..that made me feel like an old woman...I'm still surprised sometimes when I can get out of a car or my desk chair without pain...good feeling! I expect the pain but it just doesn't happen...WOW!
Judy..we had a great vacation..thanks for asking! Not much to say about a trip to the beach, we ate, slept, hung out at the beach..that's about it...I swear my DH is a little kid sometimes though...he put a crab on my leg (a dead one) to make me scream..then he brought some kind of bug over and made me scream..then when we took our stuff to the car when we were leaving I rode on the luggage cart...my DH is not a very good driver but it was fun...sometimes I don't think we act our age but who wants too anyway! Our kids weren't around to be embarrassed by their crazy parents!
Hope everyone is doing OK...we have all come so far....I'm proud of all of you!
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Yes, it has been quiet here. What does that mean? I had Zometa #3 this evening and so far I feel fine. I have to drink a lot of water to flush it out of my system so I'll probably have to get up several times during the night. The nurse who came to my house was very nice and she managed to get the IV going after only 1 poke. Hope everyone is doing well.
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Hi all, I have been coming to visit every day, but saw how quiet it was and there wasn't much going on with me so I didn't post anything. I really hope that we are all just so busy getting on with our lives that we just didn't get round to it - how far we have all come!
Geri - good to hear that each day is getting better. "good" tired and pain is always better than the alternative
Titan, just the thought of the Taxol pain makes me shiver. I swear that sometimes I still feel it in my jawbone (yuck!).Sounds like you had fun at the beach! I think that sometimes we need to let go and have a laugh. Of course, as you say, always preferable without the kids around, as they just want the ground to open up and swallow them. My husband is a real joker and it drives the kids crazy.
Helen - Hope you are doing ok. How many Zometas do you need to have? I hope you are ok with it and not suffering any side effects - I think we have had enough of those.
I have been doing ok this week. We had visitors from overseas and it was fun to catch up. All the kids disappeared downstairs and we ate, drank and generally had a good evening. I have still not started taking my bone meds, because I am so nervous about the acid reflux, but I know I need to start. I think Monday will be a good day - I take them once a week. I am feeling tired as ever, but the drop in temperature is making it a little easier to sleep at night. The hot flashes don't seem so bad at the moment. I am still not making any progress on my weight, those few pounds will not budge and I am trying not to become too obsessive about it.
Alaina - how are you doing? Are you back on your feet? Lena - let us know you are ok.
To Betsy, Amy and anyone else I may not have mentioned - hope all is well.
I am sending you all hugs and have a wonderful sunny weekend! Judy x
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Hi everyone. I'm doing fine following the Zometa. I guess I'm one of the lucky ones who doesn't seem to react to it. (not lucky with all the other bc stuff though). I've had 3 infusions so 3 more to go over the next 18 months. My bone density showed things are about the same as last year so I'll keep taking the calcium and vit D3. I'm exhausted by the end of the week. Lots of issues in my new schools, many of which are related to Special Ed or kids acting badly and even a few teachers acting badly ... LOL. Have a great weekend everyone.
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Helen - good to hear that you are doing ok on the Zometa. Hope you are taking some time to rest this weekend.
I am going to have my hair straightened shortly - I have washed it four times this morning with special shampoo the hairdresser gave me and I am both excited and nervous - I hope it looks ok. I will post a photo hopefully.
Hope you are all doing well today and enjoying the gorgeous fall weather!
Hugs to you all, Judy x
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Hi all, am back from the hairdresser! Have a good evening, Hugs, Judy x
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Hi all...my computer access has been down so I've been quiet these days.
Judy- I love your new avatar! Look at all that hair.
Titan (My favorite nut!) - We haven't had cable in over a year and so I only get to watch f.b. games that are broadcast on the network stations. It's too early in the season for me to get too excited about being #1. I couldn't believe the Buckeyes fell to #3 after losing one game. Everytime I see them, I root for them and think of you, unless of course we meet again in the finals, then it will be...GO Ducks!
This week I have my series of appointments. BS on Monday, onc on Thursday. I hope there will be absolutely nothing for me to report. I really like boring dr. appts these days. I know they are going to get mad at my weight gain. On the bad side, no weight loss, on the good side I've exercised 5 days a week for the past two weeks. I just need to keep it up.
Lately, I've been feeling twinges of bone pain, maybe it's the weather but I don't like it.
Have a great week everyone!
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Judy, love your hair!!!! WOW!!
Betsy, hope that bone pain is just arthritis -- I had a pain in my hip for a few weeks but it seems to be much better. I only get twinges now.
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Judy - Love, love, love your hair!
Betsy - hope the bone pain goes away quickly - mine is from the AI's and is not going anywhere. Some days better than others.
Helen - sorry to hear your students (and teachers) are being difficult. Just give 'em hell!
Hi Titan - between you and Betsy I am still confused over Ducks and Bucks!
Work is a real bitch at the moment..having an audit at work, and I am right in the middle of it. Hopefully will only last a few more weeks. Haven't been ale to do anything but work and sleep - so far behind in housework and socializing, I give up for now. And Kathy (Ikat), if you are reading this, I'm sorry I didn't ven get a chance to return your call - dinner as soon as this is over!
Have a good week everyon - Lena...where are you???
Geri
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Thank you all! I am still getting used to it, but am really happy with it so far! (has only been a few hours...).
Betsy - good luck with your appointments this week - pls let us know how it goes. I hope the bone pain goes away, will you speak to the doc about it?
Geri - take it easy and try and rest. I hope this week is an easier one at work.
Have a good night all, Judy x
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Hi everyone!
I had another friend diagnosed last week. She has IDC, about 1cm tumor. I am so sad for her. She has called me a lot and is in that awful time of trying to decide on a surgeon and a treatment plan (is she ER+, Her2+, etc). It all came flooding back to me. It's funny, during treatment, I knew it was tough, but I just kept moving to get through it and was lucky not to have any serious or unexpected side effects. But looking at what my friend is going to go through, I get so sad for her.
I wonder if it will always feel this fresh.
Aside from this sad news, it's beautiful here, I love the fall weather in the NorthEast. I started a fitness class for cancer survivors at the local YMCA, it's funded through the LiveStrong foundation. It should be good and I'm hopeful it will jumpstart my weight loss which has completely stalled. It's 2x/week for 12 weeks.
Things at home have settled down. My kids are doing fine in school (third grade), I'm still working a very flexible job while the kids are in school.
Hope all is well with you all!
Pam
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Hi Pam, good to hear from you! I am glad that things have settled down at home and your fitness class sounds great! Even if the weight does not come off as quickly as you would like, it is still good to get out and excercise and meet people.
I am so sorry to hear about your friend's diagnosis. It is always so hard and I am not sure it gets any easier. It just makes it all come rushing back to us. Like I once wrote here, I find it hard to be really upbeat and positive when I know how hard the coming months are going to be. I try to find a balance between being encouraging and honest. I know that some people find it quite manageable, but I found the whole surgery/treatment time, just a living nighmare. Of course, I try to be supportive of people, and they can see that I came out the other end, but I think it is the support and advice that they receive from us which can really help them with the realities of what they have to face and cope with. Maybe I am too harsh, but I think that the more informed we are the more we have the tools to deal with the whole process. My Onc offered me lots of advice and suggestions to help me through treatment, but in the end, I had to find my own way to get through it. I tried so many different things, and I found Acupuncture to be the most helpful.
Lena - how are you doing? Please come by with all your news! Alaina - I hope you are doing well.
Sending hugs as always to everyone, have a good day, Judy x
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I'm glad we have this thread to support each other. While I know we all need face-to-face in person support too, I know all of you understand and we can feel for each other.
Speaking of exercise, my onc has also referred me to an exercise program for bc women at the nearby rehab hospital. It's 2 x a week for 4 months. Yesterday I went for my assessment and fortunately I passed - so blood pressure, heart etc, seem to be ok. I have a ton of weight to lose so I'm also hoping this will jump start me. Unfortunately only one class a week is in the evening so I may only get there once a week. However, I had arranged a few holiday days and that coincides with the first class. So Friday morning I start.
Pam, we'll have to compare notes.
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Helen - that sounds great! Even once a week is a start. I used to do 3+ times a week before BC and I am only just about getting back to 3 now.
I have found this board so helpful over the past year and a half. Just being around people who can appreciate what I am going through.
I started my bone meds on Monday and to be honest, I have not felt great since. I have had flu like symptoms which is normal apparently and my legs are aching more than usual. I am going to give it another couple of doses and if there is no improvement, then I may have to consider an alternative. Me and SEs are not a good combination - if they are out there, I seem to have them
!Hope you are all having a good day! Sending you all hugs, Judy x
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Hi all,
This whole moving escapade has hit me on the head like a piano dropped from a 100 story building -- the physical and emotional exhaustion while my head just won’t stop spinning from all the change. I bit off WAY more than I could chew in that regard. I was screamingly busy for a few weeks there not just with the unpacking/setting up but serious computer problems (which are now resolved -- if the loss of the entire main backup system doesn’t count --NOT!-- but I’m too wrecked and fed up to troubleshoot it now) and then, getting down to only having a few things left to do, it all hit me at once.
I haven’t felt like writing, and still don’t (and am NOT in the mood to deal with those few things still left either, particularly straightening out the mess I discovered that the medical transition didn’t go anywhere near as smoothly as I was led to believe). Anyway, so here’s just a kick in the side so you know I’m not dead. I hope you’re all OK.
Dunno when I’ll be back to do any more than read/lurk but don’t worry about me.
~Lena.
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Lena, no matter what you say, we will worry about you. You are an important member of our group and we need everyone no matter how crappy any of us feel. We and you are entitled to feel crappy. Your move was huge. Such drastic change can cause even a normal healthy (do any exist?) to struggle. Change is difficult even when we cause it ourselves. So just read/lurk for now if you want but please do come back when you are ready. And Lena, just so you know, I feel crappy most of the time as well. I come here because I know you women understand. No one else in my life understands. And some people who used to be in my life have caused me to feel totally crappy. Seems I'm not getting over that.
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Lena - so pleased to hear from you! It is completely understandable that this whole move wiped you out. It was a huge thing to do! We look forward to hearing from you when you have the time and energy and will of course continue to worry about you and think about you : )
Helen - we are always here for you.
Hope all are doing well today. Hugs to you all, Judy x
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Just passing through to wish you all a good weekend!
Hugs, Judy x
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Lena..thanks for the kick in the side! Good to know you are OK..even though you are so tired! Heck..being tired is NORMAL...given all you have done the past few weeks!
Picked up my most wonderful son at school today..haven't seen him for 6 weeks..he is such a great kid...I love him! He is going to my DD's college tomorrow night for Halloween...I hope I don't get a call in the middle of the night!
Right now I have started his laundry and I can't tell you how much fun I'm having!
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Well, after 19 months, my body decided it didn't like menopause...now I'm having hot flashes AND cramps! REALLY?!?!?! Not fair, just SO not fair! *pffft*
In August, my gyn said that my ovaries were in premature ovarian failure and my blood counts indicated I was in menopause (FSH of 29.7). Apparently (according to my oncologist) I was "borderline" (NOW they tell me!)
Going to have a pelvic sonogram on the 11th to make sure my ovaries have actually awakened and its not the Tamoxifen jacking with me.
This disease is the the gift that keeps on giving.
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Alina, my only suggestion for hot flashes is to cool your core. It may sound silly but I would cool my stomach (cold air,ice cubes,what ever) and it would stop the flashes.
Hope this helps.
Geri: congrats on the walk, I hope work is getting easier.
kathy
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Hi all,
No bad news with my two onc appt's this week TG. My surgeon took me off the experimental drug, trental & Vit. E for radiation induced fibrosis. I'm happy, four less pills to take daily. My med onc did not have a problem with me postponing my transition to AI's. I total him I'm still not ready, he said we can defer our conversation to next year at this time. He said maybe the research will show different results in a year. He said if I don't do AI's now that it adds 5 years to my treatment plan. In my head I thought that is total BS. He said 5 years Tamox. and 5 years AI's, not going to happen. I already have roving bone pain from tamox., I know I am not going to even try AI's. Remember, I'm the one that has every SE that these damn tx plans indicate. It really makes me mad...but better mad at that than life.
Lena - I totally understand how exhausted you are. Hang in there, your energy will come back but don't push it.
Alaina - sorry to hear you are having hot flash problems. Ikat is right, think cool thoughts and staying cool it does help. I keep a hand fan at my desk at work and I have switch to much lighter clothes. I dress in layers and just shed them when needed. It seems to work.
Pam - sorry to hear about your friend.
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Alaina...my FSH was 72! My ovaries are pickled! I'm DONE! But Ikat was right..cool your core...keep a cold washcloth or towel next to the bed and when you wake up with a hot flash..stick that cloth right on your stomach...it's a little bit of a shock but you will cool down quickly!
Betsy..did your Ducks win?
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Titan, so nice to hear from you! And so pleased that you are enjoying your son! (and his laundry LOL).
Alaina - the menopause is just yuck! I started at 37 and it was horrid and still is. But if you can find ways to cool yourself, it does help. Sometimes a glass of cold water is good, or just running my wrists under cold water. I hope that you feel better soon. I do find it more manageable in the cooler weather though.
Betsy - good to hear that your Onc appts went ok.
I have a BS check up tomorrow morning, hopefully, it will go alright. I am a little nervous actually.
Lena - I hope you are resting up a bit and taking it easy.
Geri and Amy, hope you are both having a great weekend.
Hugs to you all, Judy xxx
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I cannot believe that I just signed out before I submitted this nice long post I wrote!!!! UGH
Since I simply cannot write it again, I will tell you all that I addressed each of you, wishing you well, and I will be back soon.
Geri (mutter, mutter, damn chemo brain!)
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Ok, so apparently I was being too delicate in my description of what is going on.
I was in menopause (happily, even with the hot flashes) for 19 months.
Last week, I GOT MY PERIOD BACK!!! *ugh*
And now I'm having hot flashes AND cramps!!! That's the unfairness!
Hotflashes, I can handle...my period can go away...for good!
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Hi Judy..yes I enjoyed my son...he is a great kid..I know I'm bragging but I can't help it. Both my kids are turning out pretty well and it makes me feel good...My kids handled the cancer thing pretty well..I still hate to think about that time when I told them I had breast cancer...that was so awful...what a nightmare..but you know what..that is life and it certainly isn't perfect..I consider myself lucky to still have my parents. My husband's dad died of lung cancer when he was only 18 years old. I never met him. I miss him and I didn't even know him. Life is so precious and breast cancer has taught me that..it sucks that it did and I'm certainly not going to thank cancer for it but I really do appreciate things so much more..
Ok..ladies..chemotherapy..most of us are now 19-20 months out.How are you all doing? Any se's still? My body aches are over but I still think I have some chemo brain left...I really can't remember things that well...like things in the past...some things are coming back but sometimes I can't remember things b-4 my cancer diagnosis...!
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Geri - so nice to hear from you! I completely get the Chemo brain thing, I still have it, although it is my short term memory which is more affected. We look forward to hearing from you when you have the time and energy to write.
Alaina - so sorry you are having a hard time. Are you going to see your doctor about it? I hope that you are feeling better as soon as possible. Are you fully recovered from your surgery?
Titan - I remember when we told the kids that I had BC. My youngest son, who was almost 6, did not join the conversation and we talked to him later on. My girls who were 12 and 10 at the time were very good about it considering how young they were. My eldest, actually guessed before we even told her (go figure!). But I think that it will stay with them forever and whenever I get sick, even with a cold, they worry. My eldest was adamant that she didn't need therapy, but my other daughter did and still goes to see someone. They are also thinking about the fact that I am BRCA 1 and they may have inherited that too. So, we try to focus on the fact that I am still here, and survived, but it still carries so much baggage.
Well, as for chemo SEs, as I said, the memory is not good, I cannot multi task anymore and the smallest jobs become huge challenges for me. I feel tired and my body aches too sometimes. I am on my second week of the bone meds, so we will see if I get the SEs from those tonight like I did last week.
This morning, I saw the BS and thankfully, everything is clear. We talked about possible reconstruction, but even though I know that I want to do it, I am not sure when I will be ready. Just the thought of the surgery and pain is too traumatic for me at the moment. I did ask her if she thought I had put on enough weight to take the tissue from my stomach and she said that she wasn't sure that I had enough, so that is very encouraging! Maybe I am not as big as I think I am. She asked me all about the SEs of chemo and if they are still hanging around and I filled her in on that. Then, when the appointment was over, I went to my car and sat and sobbed! I have no idea why. I had been nervous for this appointment, but I didn't expect it to have such an effect on me. Just going to the building and all the associations had quite an impact. After I had composed myself, I came to work, but still feel a little disfuntional today. You know, just when I think that I may be taking a step forwards, I realize that I am not near to putting this behind me.
I don't know what I would do if I didn't have all of you to come and talk to!
Hope you are all having a good day and I will come by again soon. Hugs to you all!
Judy x
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Judy...glad your appt. went well even through it was so emotional for you....I see my onc and bs this Thursday...don't even want to go there!
I have my first cold that I have had in years...I admit I'm freaking a little about it now..even though a cold is normal!
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