Doctors have feelings?

Options
gogo_xago
gogo_xago Member Posts: 131
edited June 2014 in Stage III Breast Cancer

Hi gals, today we had with my mother, an appointment with her onc. Everything is fine, all tests are perfect. But we left his office both, very sad, because of his behavior. He is one of the top onc. in Greece and we trust him. But when we met him for the first time, (after my mom's surgery), to see her and to define her chemo, the only thing he said to my mom was: "You know that you will loose your hair?" You can understand how she felt better than me... He always after then, is typical and doesn't speak a lot. But today his words were too hard. He checked all tests and said to my mom: "you are OK at the moment" #$%^#^@^%#^%$#%. And then, he said that he want to see my mom in 6 months. When I asked him why in 6 months, (we used to visit him every 3 months), he said: "All these checks and scans every 3 months, do not held in general survival". #$%^#^@^%#^%$#%. #$%^#^@^%#^%$#%. Why some docs can not think before they talk? Where are their feelings? We want to celebrate for good results and now we are both disappointed.

· Share on FacebookShare on Twitter

Comments

  • NancyD
    NancyD Member Posts: 3,562
    edited October 2010

    Sadly, some drs just never develop a good "bedside manner." I've heard, though, that some medical schools are starting to give classes on this kind of thing, but it's too late for your mother's onc unless he wants to take a remedial class, lol.

    I have a brother-in-law who is a retired surgeon. His bedside manner was lacking when I first met him 30 years ago. I thought, "He's so egotistical." Over the years, his manner has softened, and now that he's retired, he's really quite nice to deal with. He's been my "go to" person to answer my questions as I went through my breast cancer treatment. At times, I didn't want to hear the hard truth, but he's been able to tell when it was necessary for me to hear it and when he could refrain from giving me all the worst case scenarios.

    I'm sorry your mother's onc is such a bad communicator. It doesn't help her get through this emotionally...but then, that's probably what you can do for her better than anyone else. 

    · Share on FacebookShare on Twitter

Categories