Chemo Starting Sep 09
Comments
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Barbara - Love the super cute hair! I'm jealous of your no-more-curls do. I've sort of got my "curls" (more like kinky little waves...ugh) under control with daily flat ironing and Bumble&Bumble hair wax. But it would be so much easier to just cut them off!
RonnieK - Bummer on the eye cream allergy. I've had similar reactions to eye creams in the past, usually when I've been in for a facial so I haven't the foggiest clue as to ingredient what causes it...I just wake up with horrible swollen and baggy eyes.
My most noticeable lingering effects of chemo are an aversion to sugary sweets and salt. While I still look longingly at donuts, I know they will taste awful. And I used to salt everything (and I mean everything...potato chips, saltine crackers !). So I'm thinking chemo actually did me a tiny little favor. HA!
Have a happy weekend everyone!
Patty
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JANE - I hope you're doing OK and your hubbie too. So sorry you're still dealing with pain. I miss hearing from you.
BARBANNE - that is a cute haircut! I've actually had 2 haircuts now!! and it still isn't long enough!
CHINA and ANITA - so glad you're both NED... didn't know that term before, but I guess it's the best they can give us : ) But even though we're NED, it doesn't help the pain and other SEs we all seem to be suffering from.
RONNIEKAY - congrats on birth days and birthdays of grandbabies. Don't you just love gramma-hood?
NEECE - Don't you have a birthday soon? Or did I miss it?
KIM - That is a heartbreak not to be able to see your granddaughter. I hope her mother will come to see the benefit of the gramma relationship for her daughter. Did you get your surgeries scheduled?
CATHERINE - Waiting to hear about the sweet 16 party... and how are those nipples doing?
PATTY - Twiggy haircuts - yep. But I was thinking about that the other night - I'm wondering if it doesn't feel so "cute" these days because like someone said - it's the chemo connection. But I also tried to explain to my DH that I feel less feminine in general and so the short, masculine style just compounds that issue for me. Anyone else have that struggle - about femininity since surgery? Those of you who had reconstruction, I wonder if that makes a difference? I even went out and bought 3 tops that are obviously feminine hoping that might help.
PAMELA - If you're still checking in, we'd love to hear from you.
TO ALL: I would hate to lose contact with any of you. Does Jane have all our email addresses or home addresses? Would we be able to send them to you Jane? Or you can send them to me. There are some from the past I sure wish we could hear from!
Our plans have changed - once again. We had hoped to be at The Ranch by now, but DH got a new diagnosis and we need to stay near the dr. until he gets settled with these new meds. So we put that trip on hold for awhile. SIGH
Well - it's that time of year again - "Breast Cancer Awareness" - I want to say, "I'm very aware, thank you." Last year when at a grocery store we were asked if we wanted to contribute to Breast Cancer research and my DH said, "we already did". This year, however, when I saw Chevron was collecting to help local women pay for screening, I gladly donated.
Last month, a local prosthesis store which has a "Forever Woman Boutique" (just for mastectomy supplies) had a Saturday tea and presentation of a new prosthesis - if you haven't seen one, it's amazing. A mold is taken of the chest wall and this fits so securely that no adhesive is needed. Very interesting - but currently very expensive ($3000 and up) but supposedly works great. They also had new silicone breasts that allow more air movement and are lighter weight. So I ordered one and it is cooler. It's made by Naturalwear if you're interested.
Good to visit with you all!
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Happy Sunday afternoon
PATTY: I have some weird food goof-ups from chemo too. I find that salt tastes & smells (?) like pepper. I've never really craved salt but now I think everything needs more. I also have no desire for fruit, which I always loved. Breads, proteins, veggies & chocolate are great! I don't crave donuts or pastries either, just plain bread. I also have a hard time drinking h20...or anything for that matter. I know how important it is to hydrate, especially since I'm still getting zometa but I just don't feel like drinking anything. My onc said I need to see the nutritionist, as they have ways to trick the body into getting around little quirks! I need it...I know it's so important to eat well!
VICKILYNN: I agree...I would love to know that we'll never lose touch with each other. Some of our sisters have been away from this thread for a long while and I wonder how they are. I know that many of us add to other threads but...this is special, I think
Does anyone have a suggestion for a list of our physical & email addresses? Prayers for your hubby....you'll make it to the "Ranch"...you're needed I'm starting to get all the BC information too....October again....saw the NFL was wearing pink today. My friend started chemo on Thursday...Adriamycin x 4 & then Taxotere x 12. She asked me for info & I gave her so much that she said, ENOUGH! I so want to help her get through this but I think she wants to take it a step at a time, and I understand. I had a friend that went through it 6 months before me and I picked her brain for hours at a time. I wish she'd check in on bc.org but she's decided not to use the computer during treatment. Please say a prayer for Deb
Love to all!
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Vickilynn how sweet you are and what an amazing memory you have. My birthday is coming up soon, thank you. My party is next weekend (some days before the actual day) and I now have close to 60 RSVP's!! Am starting to worry I won't be able to feed / water / accommodate / entertain everyone. I never expected so many to make it, to be honest. But I am delighted and very excited they are. This will be the one and only "BIG" birthday bash I do, and I figure if you can't celebrate turning 50, especially after the year like we have all had, what can you celebrate?
i have been busy making a 'playlist' of music to play on the day (in between when my son is singing) and it has been such fun. It has songs I grew up with, those I grew to love later in life, and old classics. I have called it 'a musical journey' and it makes me realise what a big part music plays in our lives and how a song can instantly transport you back to the age of 15, or 20, or 35....
Ronnie Kay and BarbAnne I love your new photos. You are both very classy ladies!!!!
I did the big 'first haircut' last week - actually found it hard to bring myself to ask them to cut off even a tiny bit - each cm of hair felt so hard won! However my new curls were, sadly , starting to grow out and it was looking pretty weird. So I am now back to my pre-chemo length and style, with exception of bit of a wave that I never had before.
Vickilynn I really understand your point about not feeling 'feminine', especially after having spent months being bald. I think perhaps the reconstruction has helped me a little in that regard, although (while I am happy with my foobs) they can never replace the look, feel and response of natural breasts. This is something people don't seem to understand - they think that if you have had recon then all is back to how it was, if not better. While I do sometimes joke that the advantage is that my foobs are 'gravity proof' and I now go bra-less most of the time, they certainly don't feel like my natural ones, particularly in the femininity area.I am glad to read that there are now better prostheses being manufactured - and hope the price will come down considerably so that soon, those new styles become the standard for women post bc who don't have recon.
I hope Pamela is OK - I miss her posts and worry about her!!!!
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Hello SOSisters.... yes I'm still here. Sorry I haven't posted in a while. Work is major crazy and I have been packing, having garage sales, doing Craiglist ads trying to get ready for the move which is next Thursday! My wrists hurt like heck, go back to dr. next week. My heels are getting better tho!
Vickilynn - thank you so much for your warm thoughts about DH. I think preparing for the move has helped keep him focused on something other than his procedure, he's decided to go with the one time radiation seeds which will happen on the 21st. I so agree about the emails and keeping up with everyone, I have a few emails. If everyone will PM with their email I will consolidate and send anyone who wants the list, that way we can keep up with each other. I'm like the rest of you, really worrying about Pamelajo. I suspect all the rest of our sisters are just busy with everyday life.
BarbAnne - I love your haircut! Mine is so unruly and just goes every which way. I'm thinking of telling hairdresser to cut mine short too. How's the itching? I have heard of two more remedies, don't know if you want to try either one - cornstarch and toothpaste. I think my grandmother use to do the cornstarch. Read about toothpaste for itching in the paper.
ChinaBlue - congrats on the clear bone scan. I know you were relieved! I'm having all sorts of aches and pains, plus my wrists hurting. I just keep telling myself it's left over chemo and old age creeping up!
Patty - I love the headed to the freezer to cool off. I have been known to look at frozen items at the grocery store when what I'm really doing is cooling off. DD gave me a magnet for the freezer says "open in case of hot flash". Flat iron? DD recommended I blow dry and then flat iron my hair when it gets a little longer. That just sounds like so much work! I'm not sure what I will finally end up with but whatever will not take much work to do.
Catherine - so glad to hear all is going well for you. We've been missing you.
Ronnie Kay - I love your curly hair. If I had curls all over like you, I'd let mine go! I only have a few curls, some waves, some straight, one very thin spot and some very thick spots! Glad to hear that you are glad you downsized. You know how in the back of your head you have that little doubt - are we doing the right thing? I've given away/sold enough stuff to furnish a small apartment! Yes, it is BC month and we are raising money at work for the local cancer center. Because I don't have enough to do I took on that project!
Neece - Happy Birthday because I may not post on your special day. It sounds like you are going to have a wonderful celebration! I'm sure you will have plenty of food, room and music! I agree about music, funny how hearing a song can transport you to another time and place. I so agree with you and VickiLynn about the feminine issue. Between the estrogren depletion, the hair, the weight gain, the aches and pains I just feel like a blob! I have long since given up feeling the least bit attractive - more like a frumpy old lady. The sad part is lack of motivation on my part to lose any weight!
Well sisters, I will try not to be so long next time. Everyone take care and to our sisters reading but not posting, please let us know how you are doing!
Thoughts and prayers are with you!
Jane
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Thanks for all the compliments on my hair. I really love it. It is very freeing.
Patty and Ronnie... food. Me too! I have always been a cake and donut girl. now I have no interest. And occasionally when I eat one for "ole times sake" it still doesn't taste good. Same thing with sugar, and fruit, and even ketchup, and I use to be addicted to ketchup, put it on everything, now I never eat it. But salt, I love, never used to, now I can't get enough, warm and salty. I would just like to lose some weight but it isn't budgin, no matter what I do...
Jane so glad to hear from you. Yes, I think we are all worried about Pamela, hope she pops in at some point. I am glad you are doing ok, sorry about the wrists. I know I am less stiff, but if I push too hard I end up spending the whole evening shuffling around my house like I am 90. Mines all in my ankles. How did you do with all the rain in your area? I am sending good vibes for your hubby's procedure, your move, and you joints. Also thanks for the itch tips
Ronnie- what fan-tab-ulous new photo, you are gorgeous.I saw all the NFL with pink too, one game was being played with a pink ball, I found it all very funny for some reason..I am so sorry for your friend, I will keep her in my prayers.
Vicki-I am very sorry for your change in plans. I will pray for your hubby, sending you peaceful vibes.
Neece-a very happy birthday, early to you...I hope you have a super fun party. big birthday hugs to you.
Patty, If you get sick of it you could always cut it short, the girl at the salon said I was so brave to go so short, she was young with shoulder length hair, and I said Honey when you've been bald for months at a time, short is a piece of cake..
A couple of you mentioned cold..well we had a cold front come through and it was maybe 49 out, sunny but breezy and cold, I did a ton of yard work in shorts and a sweatshirt, happy as a clam at high tide, my hubbsters couldn't stand it, I was so happy to feel cold..
My itch is better, It seems if I am very cool and dry I am ok, get a little warm or sticky anywhere and I just want to itch, my legs are even a mess. but I think I am on the road to recovery. little by little.
Hope you all are well
Love, hugs and prayers
Barbara
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Gosh, such a busy board the last few days. I'm sorry to learn that many of you guys have the same changed taste buds I have...but I'm kind of happy to know I have company. Which I guess is the whole point of these boards, we always have company!
This NED thing. I peek at the Stage IV boards ocassionally and they use that alot. They talk about "dancing with NED" when things are going well. Cute!
RonnieK - Love your hair! I don't know what it looked like pre-chemo, but frankly you'd never know you were bald a few months ago. I'll definitely say a prayer for Deb. My heart goes out to people who are just starting their treatment. It is such a long haul. When I was first diagnosed I had all kinds of questions I posed to a friend who had finished treatment a few months before. She was encouraging, but very vague about things. I think she was trying to protect me! I figure if someone asks, they want real information. If they don't ask, they are probably happier not knowing what to expect.
Jane - I'm sure it is scarey, but I think you are absolutely doing the right thing in downsizing. I'm so anxious to do the same. But then I remember there are four more years of high school before the kid is even close to leaving home (and probably not so ready even then)...so no changes for me for a while. Good luck with the move!
Neece - Your birthday bash is shaping up to be BIG. Don't worry about the logistics, you'll have lots of help from the guests and they'll be having a good time no matter what.
Vicki - Sorry your trip got delayed. I hope the new meds take effect soon and you and your DH will be able to go. Thanks for the info on the new prothesis. I'll share it with my Mom who wears one. She's a child of the depression and seemingly genetically unable to spend money. (I didn't get those genes!) A few years ago I caught her wearing a prosthesis that she had put duct tape on to hold it in shape! Can you imagine? I checked with her insurance and she can get a new foob every couple of years at no cost...so now she's always got the latest and greatest.
Barbara - Hooray for cool weather, hopefully you'll have months of it to come and the itch will go away!
I certainly have not been feeling at my most attractive either. I feel like I've aged so in the past year and then have the too short hair on top of that. Here's a story I hope isn't too politically incorrect. Last evening I was at a restaurant with a friend (male) while our sons were in martial arts. I noticed a couple of women at a nearby table who had very short hair and were dressed in a manner that made it pretty clear they were of the more mannish-style gay persuasion. Throughout the meal I'd feel eyes on me and sure enough, they seemed to be taking turns staring at me. I think they were trying to decide if I shared their sexual orientation. So I guess I'm now attractive to gay women. Beats not being attractive to anybody...but still...not exactly an ego booster!
Patty
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Patty - love your story! Nice to have a chuckle so early in the am.
Hope everyone has a great day!
Jane
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Patty - love your story! Nice to have a chuckle so early in the am.
Hope everyone has a great day!
Jane
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Patty I love that story!! I must say we hired a new instructor, no big news there we hire a ton of new part-timers every fall, and the other secretary and I were sure this woman was a gay. We have a huge gay community in Ann Arbor so that is nothing new, but one day I was talking to her about something and she mentioned her husband..ba da dump....I told the other secretary who said "Barb I am so glad you had that conversation, cause my face would of given it away.." I guess we learned you can never tell!
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Hello my Sept. Sis! Sorry I haven't post in a while just been going to PT's! 2's x a week for the leg and 1 X a week for the arms! Leg is taking longer than I expected.I still can't walk up stairs land walk like I used too! Damn it!!!!
Neece, wow!!! no knock out for the nips!!! I get mine in Jan. You know, foobs are hard to get use too! But the implants sure do beat the TE's. I am should we all wish I could be there for your B-day! My Brother in law will be in Australia for a job around the 20th of Oct.
Wiil check back yall later
Wanda
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Thanks for checking in Wanda... what a pain - literally!
Hope all the rest of you are doing well. We must all be enjoying our weekend!?
RonnieKay - Great hair! honestly. I wish mine had that much volume! it is filling in a bit, but pretty thin.
Patty - I do know what you mean... I don't want to be called Spike!
Barbara - glad you're less itchy!
Jane - how's the move coming?
Neece - looking forward to birthday party stories!!!
Anita - hope you're doing well.
Dancing with NED - I love it!
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Hello SOSisters...just checking in for a quick post. Packing, packing and packing. We move on Thursday. Have dr's appt tomorrow, will be interesting to see how that goes with my Femara vacation, hurting wrists, bone pain and a multitude of hot flashes. And have I mentioned we move on Thursday!
Thanks to those who sent their true addresses and emails. I am compiling a list and will send to all who would like one. Glad everyone is doing well, will try to post a nice long message this weekend.
Take care. Thoughts and prayers are with you!
Jane
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Jane - Good luck with the move! Such a hateful job. I'll be e-mailing you shortly with my "real" world identity.
Barbara - Here's another "mistaken sexual-orientation" story for you: We have a very handsome very straight guy, Mario, who manages the crew for our bridal shows. One day he and I were walking the show floor when an exhibitor came running over, gushing "Mario, I have the most wonderful person I'd like to set you up with! He is handsome, funny, has a great job...I think you'll love him." Mario replied "That's great. But I'm not gay." You should have seen her face! After she floundered around trying to say something to make it better, we all just burst out laughing.
Neece - How was the party?
HUGE NEWS - I was getting my morning coffee at Starbucks and when the barrista guy handed me my drink he said "I love your hair." I checked behind me to make sure it was my hair he was referring to before saying thank you. Progress! Although a part of me wonders whether he was admiring it for his own head. HA!
Patty
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Patty great hair story! My DH thinks we are all obsessed by our hair! he is right! But with good reason don't you think?
Jane good luck with the move, it is a big thing to have to do.Are you moving far?
Well my birthday bash was just wonderful. There were over 50 people there, including my "oldest" friend from high school, who I have known since we were 13, and two of my college friends (since we were all 18), plus my family, and relatively new friends, and friends from work... the best thing was my son singing three songs and dedicating them to me, and being able to make a speech in which I was able to acknowledge and thank people for all their unique contributions to my life. I had the most wonderful time. Probably the only big birthday party I will ever have but it was worth it!!
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Wanda- so good to hear from you. Will keep you in my thoughts about the stairs.
Vicki- Hope you and the hubby are doing well-
Jane, let us know what the doc says. I already sent you my info but neglected to say I would like a list too. Hope the move is smooth.
Patty- that is Hysterical. Mistaken identity. I LOVE your hair story. omg that is what I would have done, look behind me. I am sure you are lovely.
Neece- so glad the party went well, I am not a party person, but I think if I was in Australia I would of liked to come!! Happy Birthday again!
We had a warm spell which seemed to kick my itch factor into overdrive. It is all weird. Now that it is cooler it seems to have settled down, but it is making me crazy. I have a one-year follow-up with my radiation oncologist at the end of October I am going to ask him about it too, since my regular doctor and onc didn't give me a solution.
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by the way I have a confession...I don't know if any of you read the book Dewey a Small Town Library Cat who Touched Millions, well I bought and read that book and it had a HUGE effect on me, so I wrote the author.
Well last year the authors contacted me and said they were writing a sequel of sorts and had chosen 7 letters from fans to write their stories. The book is called Dewey's Nine Lives, it is 9 total stories, two more about Dewey and the 7 of us. So the book came out yesterday. I am slightly apprehensive about it all, but frankly the cat is out of the bag now, no pun intended.
I wasn't going to say anything, except we tend to share all our highs and lows in here, so I thought I would share this too.
Have a great day sisters
Barbara
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OMG...glad I checked in...have been laughing since I logged in!!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY SWEET NEECE!!! So happy your party was a success & that you had a chance to speak from your heart....that's so important, especially now, I think!
OMG PATTY & BARBANNE...loved the "sexual identity" encounters! I felt like such a chunky pinhead that really, no group, male or female, either side of the fence, would've wanted to claim me
I just know that when we went to dinner at a little diner last Saturday night (wish I would've been at your party, NEECE, and BARB..I would've made you go with me!), everyone in there was at least 80 years old and we all had the same hair style! Thanks for the sweet comments about my hair, but I left there & made the decision to go back to fake blonde!!!! I went in yesterday and the stylists are stumped because the front is soooo white & the back is a weird salt & pepper. I told the gals about the "red" problem that some of you had & told them not to bother if they can't get it right! I'll let ya know what happens!BARB: YOU"RE FAMOUS!!!!! I'm going to the library tomorrow (was at story time today!) to get your book! I'm so proud of you.... can't wait to read it & THAT will be quite an accomplishment because my reading consists of PEOPLE magazine and anything with Bob the Builder or Fireman Sam!
I hope you enjoy your day tomorrow, JANE (at least parts of it!). It's the start of your new life & I think you'll breathe a little easier in your new, smaller digs....especially with an achy body! And PATTY....you're keeping young with that youngun in the house!!!! I was at the park with Hank, pushing him on the swing doing underdogs, when a teacher with middleschoolers on a field trip came up to me and said it was wonderful to see me having such a good time! I know I looked like a goofball but, it's nice to play young sometimes and you still get to do that daily
VICKILYNN: Let us know how hubby's doing!!! Sounds like you're still keeping busy, even if it's not in the mts with teenagers!!!
WANDA: I know you must be so frustrated with the time it's taking to heal...but you had trauma on top of trauma with your leg so........hang in there.....prayers for speedier healing
Seattle is a beautiful place to be today.....warm with a slight breeze, NO RAIN, leaves falling...I think I'm welcoming fall & winter a bit more than I did last year!
LOVE & HUGS!
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PS...got up Sunday morning, got ready to leave for the Making Strides walk, husband read info again, sign up closed at 9:00 a.m.....it was 9:20 a.m. Guess there's always next year!
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Hi All: I have been absent again and I really don't know why....Good to hear some funny stuff from you gals....
Ronnie Kay...I love the color of your hair...unfortunately my "natural" color was so dark that the gray that I did have could not cover it....went back to red at the request of my BF who said he didn't know if he would like me blonde or any other color!! I said to him, "What about the curly mess I have going on right now?" He said that he likes it. Go figure....I have never had curly hair and I have no idea what to do with it. We made the Making Strides walk on October 3rd...very moving. Doing Susan G. Komen on the 23rd.
BarbAnne...Great to hear about the book sequel....I will be watching for your stories in the bookstore.
Neece...Happy to hear about your birthday party and so glad for the great turnout.
msmpatty...I too got quite a few looks when my hair first started coming in especially when we went to the Tower District (a gay hangout) for a couple of beers. I just laughed....at least people weren't staring because I was bald and had no eyebrows/eyelashes!!!
Don't know if I mentioned having to put my 16 1/2 year old cat to sleep in July...very sad....but 2 weeks ago I responded to an ad on Craigslist and we have adopted a "rescued" kitten who is 4 months old and she is such a joy. The lady that I got her from rescues cats/kittens along with several of her friends....found this sweet little girl...a tortie calico/tabby and named her Mia Bella. She has been a great companion and is such a character.
I have a niece who is undergoing a bilateral mastectomy at the age of 39 with 2 girls still at home. I am constantly amazed at the young age that some women are diagnosed. I hate this damn disease and I hope that I have seen the last of it.
Good News....getting my "new girls" on November 9th...and then a couple of minor surgeries after that...I don't know about the rest of you, but I am so done with treatment, surgery, worry, medical bills and looking like a freak...that is my opinion of how I look...not the opinion of anyone who knows me. Just very hard to "embrace" (as my physical therapist says) the "new Kim".
Sorry for rambling....hope to hear from Pamelajo soon...she has been in my thoughts and prayers as well as you Vickilynn with your dear husband.
Kim
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Ronnie- Thank you, let me know what you think. You will know which story/chapter is mine immediately. Please let us know how the hair works out. I found brown is all that will work for me any more. I was really considering the Making Strides thing here too, but don't know if I can get it together by next Saturday, we'll see. Can't wait to hear about your hair.
Kim- I am so sorry about your kitty, what a heart breaker. Good for you for rescuing one. If you happen across the book, my story and its ties to cats will have quite an impact on you. I am sooo very sorry about your niece and will keep her in my prayers. I will also keep you in my thoughts and prayer November 9th too.
I hope we hear from Pamela too!
Jane I am thinking of you
Hugs
Barbara
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I hope everyone is doing well! I have a question for you all! Do you know anyone or have any information about getting Hardware rmove from femur bone?? I went to the Dr. and he said that since I am having pain with mine that he could take it out!?! That means another operation. I have already had 2 this year! Any information I would greatly love!
Hugs Wanda
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Wanda - I wish I had an answer for you. I hope someone else will. What a long road you've had!
Barbara - Very bad of you to keep this secret from your sista's, but you're forgiven immediately. I'm going to grab my Kindle and download the book right away. I was just reading that estrogen depletion can cause itching. This is not necessarily useful information given we PR/ER+'s are trying to get rid of estrogen...but maybe they have something just for the skin?
Kim - I'm so sorry about your kitty. Few things are harder than losing a pet. And I've found the only way to get over it is to adopt a new one. Mia Bella has found a great new mom! Hugs to your niece and best of luck on the new "girls".
Ronnie - Late to the race. Oh well. I'm so impressed by all the ladies on these boards who walk and run and do all manner of activities to raise money for BC. Me? I'm just trying to forget the whole ordeal. So I write checks when asked and hope for the best. Now...about hair dye. My hairdresser told me that she thinks the first growth we get is lacking the structure inside the hair that absorbs and holds the color. That's why we all get this surprising funky colors. There's nothing for it, just gotta wait for the good stuff. About 1 1/2" of my roots are looking really good...shiny and nice. The rest is dull and faded looking.
Neece - Your party sounds wonderful! I teared up just thinking about the speech you made and your son's songs. So lovely.
PamelaJo - You out there sweetie?
Patty
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Sorry I've been MIA. Life handed me another basket of lemons and I'm dealing with it.
I finished my chemo only to find I have another tumor in my right reconstructed boob which has invaded the dermal lymphatics. I still havent had radiation and everyone (doctors) are confident that the rads will knock it down. It's just this waiting game ya know? Thank God the tumor is in my boob and not somewhere else. my onc says for some reason we will never know but possibly because my tissue expander on that side was too tight, the chemo could not reach the tumor.......he says it is not a recurrence (which is good) but a progression of disease.
Sooooooo, after a long conversation with Dr. Hotty the plastic surgeon and my rads onc, Dr. Hottie paniced and wanted to cut off all my skin. My rads onc said nooooooooo, the spread was too diffuse and I'd lose too much skin and besides, there is 75% chance conservatively that radiation will get it all, so keep skin. It went back and forth and back and forth..........so I fired them both LOL
I've hired a new plastics man, who popped my TE out on that side on my first office visit (rather painful but thank God I can start rads sooner) and hired a new Rads Onc.
I was really terrified for about two weeks, but now I've sorta settled into the mode of search and destroy.
Please don't worry girls. I'm going to kick this things butt. I've had a co worker staying with me for the past 6 weeks who is a preacher. He has been an angel in my pocket. His prayer and kindness has gotten me through so much fear. I'm set up to go see a naturapathic doctor up north next Friday to get on some supplements to help the radiation work even better.......
On brighter notes, Dennis is finally in therapy and he seems to be better. Everyone, him, family, friends, doctors say I will get through this (for some reason all I think of is death and all I hear is negative, I think I have white coat syndrome). My thoughts go to the darkside for some reason even though I know full well that what is happening is not the worst thing to happen to a breast cancer patient. I've made the mistake of doing online reasearch and we all know how old those studies are and how grim......... however, I have to keep in mind that skin mets are not the worst as long as the primary tumor is in the chest wall or boob. They can be stopped.
So I'm sorry I had to show up with bad news about me yet again. I want to thank you all for worrying about me. I will try to keep you up to date, but when I come here, all I want to do is search for someone who has survived what I have and I can't seem to find them.........so I panic, even though I know they are out there.
Thank you so much Vicki for the wonderful card. I love you so much for sending it.
I pray each of you stay on the path of healing and health.
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aww Pamela I am sooo happy to hear from you, but sad about the news. I understand a little in that when i am on the site I have a need to go to all sorts of boards stage 4 etc...with grim stuff..don't know why I do it, but it is sooo hard to stop..I am glad to hear Dennis is in therapy, and you have a friend to help you find some peace in a life of chaos. I am here praying for you. Love ya girl. Big hugs
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Wanda- I wish I had some advice, hopefully someone does.
Patty- good tip on the hair. Let me know what you think of the story. I feel incredibly awkward about the whole thing, which is why I kept it to myself. But I have had some good feedback so far. Thanks for the Estrogen tip, I read a bit about it and it does seem to be an issue, and is worse for people with already itchy skin, which is me..we'll see I just take it hour by hour and try not to let it make me crazy.
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PamelaJo - I was so delighted to sign on and see that you had posted...then my happiness turned to dismay at your continued battle with this sneaky bastard of a disease. It just doesn't seem fair that every one of your tumors has been caught so early, and yet here you are, having to fight on. I'll be praying that the rads get in there and blast those cells to kingdom come. As for finding information, have you thought about starting a thread to find others on this site who have had a similar situation? I'm so glad your co-worker is with you and that Dennis is getting help. Hugs, hugs and more hugs.
Barbara - The story is wonderful! It is such a great tribute to your intrepid and complicated mother...and her beautiful daughter. I would love to meet Mr. Sir Bob Kittens aka Mr. Pumpkin Pants (love that!). He is the kindred spirit of my Tuxedo kitty who was of the opinion that humans are just giant cat toys and good humoredly terrorized every guest who came to my home for 14 years. I had to rescue grown men from the bathroom (where she would lie in wait to launch herself at them as they emerged) and extricate her from numerous heads after she snuck along the back of the sofa and made like a hat on anyone sitting there. I adored her. (Can't say the same for my friends and family.) I'm so glad your story made it into the book!
Patty
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Aww Patty thanks. I am very happy and relieved you liked it. Tuxedo Cat sounds wonderful and fun! Mister Kittens is a kindred spirit!
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Hello SOSisters... don't have time for a long post but wanted to let you know we are moved. Lots of boxes still to unpack but we really like the condo already so obviously right decision. DH goes for his isotope radiation seeds on Thursday, please keep him in your prayers. I had doctor's appt. before we closed on the condo last week. Onc doesn't like all my aches and pains and is sending me for a full body bone scan and CT scan on Nov. 5th. I'll be glowing! Also put me on Celebrex and I do think I feel somewhat better. No Famera until he gets to the cause of the bone pain. I'm blaming it on old age and sticking with it!
I don't have time to post individually this morning. To my sisters who have already sent me their personal information, I am compiling a list and will send it to you soon. I'm so glad we are doing this so that we can keep in touch with each other!
Pamelajo - my heart goes out to you. You know you are in my prayers warrior princess and all of your sisters are sending you positive vibes. Please don't wait so long to post again, we've all been so worried about you.
To all my other beautiful sisters I wish I had more time to respond to all your posts, will try to catch up with you later in the week. I love all of you - you don't know how much!
Thoughts and prayers are with you.
Jane
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We took a last-minute trip to Montana last Monday, and just got back today. I should have made my way to Seattle and visited with you RonnieKay! We had a great visit with old friends and loved the drive with lots of fall colors. We then drove to the Oregon coast and followed it down to California and across to our home (2 hours from Eureka, CA). Trying to comprehend all of your posts quickly before geting to bed... I am so tired!
Glad to hear from you Pamela - you'll continue in our prayers! Glad you're moved in Jane. Congrats on being included in a book BarbAnne. Sorry Wanda - no info from me. Kim - Glad to hear of your new Mia Bella and so sorry to hear about your niece. Neece - glad your party was a hit!
DH is doing so much better now he's on anti-depressants. It made the trip much more pleasant : )
More later.
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