Biopsy in a Few Hours - Feeling Scared and Alone

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aprilcotton
aprilcotton Member Posts: 8
edited June 2014 in IBC (Inflammatory Breast Cancer)

3 days ago I had my mammogram and ultrasound and they scheduled me for a biopsy for today.  I am feeling very VERY scared and alone.  The ultrasound was done by a doctor rather than a technician and she said my skin thickness was 9 (she said normal is 3???) and her voice and non-verbals gave me the impression that it is IBC.  A day later my pcp told me she got an "urgent" (that was her word) message about my situation.  I have every expectation that I will be diagnosed with IBC.  I know life is never fair but I feel like I have had more than my share of problems.  I've lived 19 yrs with type 1 diabetes, have kidney disease as a result, am confined to a wheelchair because of a spinal condition, am on 24 hr oxygen for lung problems (despite never smoking a day in my life), and am bipolar to name just a few issues I deal with on a daily basis.  I am just so scared.  I just turned 37 less than 3 weeks ago and have no family health history to go on because of being adopted (closed adoption).  I live with my husband, about 2,000 miles away from my family and am alone at home for the next 3 hours while I wait for him to come home and take me for my biopsy.  I've already exhausted a box of tissues.  And I have 2 questions that I can't seem to find answers to.  First, is skin thickness of 9 REALLY bad, slightly bad, or so bad that no one will even talk about it?  And my other question is how long it takes for a biopsy result to "come in".  Sorry for writing so much.  I just feel very alone and have no one I can even talk to.  My mom is at work and I don't think my dad wants to listen to a blithering daughter regarding undiagnosed breast cancer.  My sister told me she doesn't want me to tell her about any of my health problems EVER again and I don't want to tell my 85 yr old grandmother until/unless I know things for certain.  I tried telling my dogs and cat but they seem very disinterested.  I am also a devout Christian and my husband is an ordained minister.  I know I have God all around me and that He is the only one who can truly help me, through the hands of drs or His own hands, but I am still sooo scared.  Thanks for any help!!!

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  • bcincolorado
    bcincolorado Member Posts: 5,758
    edited April 2010

    Aprilcotton:

    You are NOT alone.  There are a LOT of women on here who are with you in spirit and thoughts and know what you are going through.

    I can't answer the question about "skin thickness" since no one ever mentioned it to me at all.  I know I have what I call "stupid boobs" (very dense tissues) which made my diagnosis more difficult and caused additional testing to be done.

    It does sound like you have been through a lot medically already and as our parents always told us "life isn't fair" sometimes it just is stinky!  We have a lot of medical issues in our household too.  My husband is type 1 diabetic and a transplant patient.  Sometimes I think we know way too much medical stuff to be people who never went to med school.

    At least you are not a person who never went to the doctor and might be afraid to ask questions.  The biopsy isn't fun, I won't lie.  I am a big baby about things and almost fainted 5 times during mine, even though I was lying down!  They allowed my husband to come in the room too and he stood at the foot of the table and just rubbed my feet to help keep me calm and "there" so I didn't faint.  If you want your husband there, just have him go with you and if they say something, ask if he can come too.  I wanted mine in there.  I have a friend who had a biopsy several years ago (it was a benign cyst for her) and she wanted to go in alone and he husband sat in the waiting area.  Everyone is different.

    At the time of my ultra-sound guided biopsy, they just scheduled me to come in a few days later to meet with the radiologist and breast nurse to review the results.  I think it took about 4 days for the results. I did mine at the end of the week and then had an appointment early the following week.  It could depend on where you are and if they can run all the tests locally or have to send them out too. 

    I was a little sore afterwards but not too terribly bad.  If you can take Tylenol, you might want to have some on-hand for after to help with soreness.  I was also given a tiny little ice pack to put inside my bra to help keep swelling down.  It worked well.  I was able to drive the next day and even went to a baby shower the next day.  I did mine without telling anyone in my family, other than my husband of course who drove me and supported me, because I was convinced it was nothing.

    I did receive an "urgent" call too to come back so it doesn't necessarily mean IBC.  I was DCIS AND IDC plus had 2 kinds of pre-cancer cells so after 2 lumpectomies and a uni-mx on my "bad" side, I am waiting exchange surgery from reconstruction now.

    You are NOT alone!  Don't forget that.  You will find many supportive women here.  If it is IBC, there are boards here for women who will know exactly what you are going through.  Some for every stage of surgery, therapies, etc.  Our spouses are great and supportive, but the women here can really understand what the emotional part is.

    Try to remain calm and think good thoughts! You can PM me if you would like too.  Please know other people care too and are thinking of you today.  {{{{{{{{hugs to you!}}}}}}}}}

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  • lexi4
    lexi4 Member Posts: 1,074
    edited April 2010

    No, you aren't alone. I am happy that your docs are scheduling your biopsy promptly. Being aggresive is what you want. I had the results of my biopsy in a day. Unfortunately, it did come back cancerous. There is a chance that yours will come back negative for bc.

    Bc in colorado has great advice on care after the biopsy. It's uncomfortable, but hopefully you will do okay. The compresses do help.

    Please know that you are in my thoughts and saying prayers for comfort.

    Lexi

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  • aprilcotton
    aprilcotton Member Posts: 8
    edited April 2010

    Thanks bc and lexi.  I am also a wimp and told the lady doing the biopsy that I don't do well with pain.  She was amazing.  I wish I could go back in time and have her do the tests for you both.  She explained everything before and as it happened.  I'm not sure if my test was the same as yours but mine was a punch test.  She allowed me to stay in my wheelchair and had 2 other ladies assisting her, one a med student.  I did feel the several seconds of pain from the numbing agent but that was all.  She finished and packed it with more gauze and tape and padding than they use for mummification!  It's been about 8 hours since then and I still don't feel any pain.  I have medicine at the ready in case it does start to hurt, but nothing.  Tomorrow morning I can take the packing off and at least feel a little more normal.  I didn't get a cold compress or anything.  They said I should get the results next week and if I haven't heard by Thurs to give them a call.  I was able to talk with my mom tonight and she was a rock.  Thank you both for being here for me earlier today.  That really meant the world to me.  Now I just have to play the "wait and see" game.

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  • marlegal
    marlegal Member Posts: 2,264
    edited April 2010

    april, i'll add you to my prayer list.   most importantly, whatever happens, you've found the right place to come for support, encouragement, occasional laughter ... whatever you need.  that's what this site is all about - getting each other through whatever it is we need to get through.  i hope your thickening was from some other cause, but if it is bc, we'll get you through it.

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  • aprilcotton
    aprilcotton Member Posts: 8
    edited April 2010

    Thanks Mary.  I appreciate all the prayer I can get.  I kinda think that if enough people bug God with the same request, He may grant the prayer just to shut us all up :-)  Just kidding.  I truly do appreciate it.

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  • lexi4
    lexi4 Member Posts: 1,074
    edited April 2010

    So very happy that the biopsy went well. I am hopeful that you will fall into the 80% benign category. We really don't want you to join our club.

    Hugs and Prayers,

    Lexi

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  • aprilcotton
    aprilcotton Member Posts: 8
    edited April 2010

    Thanks, Lexi.  As wonderful as you all are, I really don't want to join your club either.  It's sort of amazing how calm I feel today.  I don't know anything more or less than I did when I wrote the original post, but I feel a million times calmer.  It makes no sense to me.  I know sometimes I ask personal questions so always feel free to tell me to bug off, but I am really interested in knowing how you did back when you had your biopsy, was waiting for the results and everything that ensued after your test was positive.  I've heard about the levels of grief and all that.  I never went through that, not with the various health issues I've had in the past, not with the 10 different friends and relatives that passed away in 2009 (sadly, that is no exaggeration), not ever did I go through those stages (denial -> acceptance).  Did you?  Is that something that really happens or just something that the psych books say happens? Again if that's too personal to ask, I won't be offended if you tell me to go fly a kite :-)

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  • Chevyboy
    Chevyboy Member Posts: 10,786
    edited April 2010

    Morning April!  I am also in Denver!  Honey, we are all here for you!  Who are your Doctor's in Denver?  Maybe I can help you!   I went through the Breast Center at Lutheran, Exempla... And my surgeon was Dr. Elizabeth Brew, who was just great!  Then for Radiology I had Dr. Wendy Nekritz, & the radiation went through the MammoSite Device that I had....But this "team" I had was so easy to work with, & they answered all my questions! 

    I had a regular Mammogram the last of October, & I was so surprised  and afraid when they called me back to say I needed an Ultra-sound.  I went for THAT, |& I watched the Tech stop & keep measuring & marking a spot....I just knew.  Then she called in the Radiologist, & he did the same thing.....I had to ask...."So what does it look like?"  He said,   "Well, it looks like a small cancer, & what we will do, is just a Lumpectomy followed by Radiation, & that will take care of it!   I couldn't beLIEVE it!  (Yes, I could...)  I went in the other room to get dressed, banged my head on the wall a couple times, & just started a new part of my life from there! 

    And now it's over 5 months later, & I'm taking Tamoxifen for 5 years....I made it this far, & by golly I know the worst is over! 

    Just don't be afraid of what you don't know.   The waiting for results are the hardest!   No matter what, keep a positive attitude! 

    And Honey, you don't have to join our club....just come hang around here sometimes & we can all talk together!  Wink Jeannette

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  • bcincolorado
    bcincolorado Member Posts: 5,758
    edited April 2010

    Jeanette:

     You are so right!  Women can just encourage each other....no matter what!

    Paula

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  • aprilcotton
    aprilcotton Member Posts: 8
    edited April 2010

    I've seen a lot of people mentioning Tamoxifen but only that they take it or that it was recommended or about side effects.  What I haven't found is WHY people take it?  Is it to prevent the cancer from returning?  And if it can prevent it, why don't people take it like they take a flu shot so that people never get it?  Am I being way too simple about things?

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  • Chevyboy
    Chevyboy Member Posts: 10,786
    edited April 2010

    Hi Aprilcotton!  You know, that WOULD seem reasonable, to take Tamoxifen as a shot, Ha!  But it is an Estrogen/Hormone "blocker" which means that IF you have cancer & it tests as ER & PR positive, then you have the type of cancer that is "fed" by hormones...And Tamoxifen blocks that action....Also there are several others that work similar, but "recept" the hormones, instead of "blocking".....This is another "tool' that we have to keep cancer from coming back.  If you Google it, you can fine EVEYthing about it! Wink  So IF you have cancer, your "team" will suggest different ways to treat it.....But maybe someday, they WILL have a shot....with the pill, I think it makes more sense to evenly distribute the Tamoxifen every day.....for usually 5 years. 

    I guess I'll just answer your PM here, since I started this, Ha!  Your "life" sounds fun to me!  I mean always having to travel, & if YOU like it, that's all that's important!   You know, you asked about treatment, but that depends on your insurance.  I went to Lutheran.... My primary care Doctor recommende Dr. Elizabeth Brew as the surgeon, & she was teriffic!  Also for Radiation at Lutheran, I had Dr. Wendy Nekritz, & SHE & her team were the best!  I go back to the breast center for a Mammogram in May...Frown but that's how they found my cancer to begin with... So it's way to early to think about what to do....without hearing about your biopsy.

    I read your first post here...Are your Parents here in Denver also?  Are you close to them?  You know, SOMEtimes, they just don't want to hear any bad news about ourselves....Same with Husbands... And the less you can tangle them up with any problems, the better it is.  That is UNLESS they are so supportive that it HELPS you...But that's what friends are for!  

     It sounds like you have a "few" other health problems that are hanging on to you ..... So you DO have to have a Primary Care Doctor, that understands your other health issues, & can recommend a good "team" to treat any new ones.

    So let us know what the results are from your biopsy!  And these are warm hugs for you.... ((((((((((aprilcotton))))))))  xoxoxoxoxo Jeannette

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  • bcincolorado
    bcincolorado Member Posts: 5,758
    edited April 2010

    Aprilcotton:  I personally HATE needles so much I think I'd rather take tamox for 5 (or more) years than get one shot....unless they could do it while I was under anesthesia!

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  • aprilcotton
    aprilcotton Member Posts: 8
    edited April 2010

    I've heard/read several people who boast about their medical teams.  I am curious...has anyone ever heard anyone say they had a bad team or didn't like their team?  I can't help but wonder if everyone praises their team, so long as they are improving.  It's got to take a very special type of person to work in that field.  I know I could never do it.  I take too much personally and don't think I could separate myself from the situations that my patients would be dealing with.

    I have insurance through my husband's job and medicare as secondary.  Is breast cancer treatment pretty much always covered?  I've heard horror stories about insurance not covering expensive treatments.  They may have been just stories, can't remember, but it does worry me that one day I might need some exensive treatment, for whatever reason, and be denied coverage.

    No, when we decided that we wanted to go on the road fulltime, my husband applied for a job with a nationwide company.  There were 60 openings between 30 states.  He did not have an option which office he would be assigned to if hired, but he WAS asked to put the sites in order of preference.  Since we were living in Virginia and were born, raised in upstate NY (that's where all our families still are), his first preference was in Georgia.  I forget exactly what the order was for the next 28 locations, but the absolute LAST choice was Denver.  We left NY to get away from cold, snowy winters.  Going on what little knowledge we had of Colorado, the last thing we wanted to do was end up in a place that has even worse winters than NY.  Turned out the only office that offered him a position was Denver.  As most people know by now, the east coast got HAMMERED by old man winter, with our place in Virginia getting a total of like 80 inches of snow.  Colorado has had a very mild winter (imho)...who'd have guessed?  We just LOVE it out here.  If it weren't for family being so far away, we couldn't think of a downside to living out here.  So no, no family.  And as fulltime campers moving all the time (and with me being all but housebound due to health) it's been nearly impossible to really make any friends.  The internet is my connection to humanity.  My parents are pretty much exactly as you described in not wanting to hear any bad news, until this came up.  My dad has been pretty much silent (not meaning anything bad, just quiet), I've been talking mostly with my mom and she has been wonderful.  Very receptive and open as a listener and offering advice in a caring manner.

    Yes, it took forever but I did find a primary in Denver.  I really have liked him but the hard part has been getting in to see him.  He is one of those teaching drs so his office hours are sooo limited that I see other drs in his office more often than I see him.  A little over a week ago I couldn't get in to see ANY dr and ended up going to the ER instead because of how sick I was.  Ended up being bronchitis (which was sort of good because it gave me a 2nd round of antibiotics that also helped the breast center team know what the antibiotics did and didn't do).  I really would rather have a dr who I can get in to see and not have to spend 6 hrs in the ER and taking up beds that people with REALLY acute needs require, if that makes any sense.

    Thanks for the hugs Jeanette.  And I promise to post the results when I get them!!!

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  • aprilcotton
    aprilcotton Member Posts: 8
    edited April 2010

    Today is a geat big hallejulia-praise-the-Lord day.  About 5 minutes ago I got the call letting me know my biopsy is negative for cancer.  They said I have chronic lymphadema but want to see me in 6 weeks, not for another biopsy but just for a follow up exam.  Thank you ALL for your prayers, your support and just being here when I didn't have anyone else I could talk to.  Not to mention that it's easier to type while crying than talking on the phone while crying.  You ladies have been the rock I needed and I can't thank you enough.  If you ever wondered why your cancer had to happen to you, I don't know the exact reason, but I can tell you that if your situation hadn't happened, then I would have been very alone...LITERALLY!  Thanks a million and I pray for the best for all of you, I truly do!

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  • bcincolorado
    bcincolorado Member Posts: 5,758
    edited April 2010

    I am so thrilled for you!  Lympadema is treatable with therapy.  I wonder if the altitude has affected you in some way to cause it?  I hope you can relax and enjoy your time in Colorado Springs!

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  • aprilcotton
    aprilcotton Member Posts: 8
    edited April 2010

    Thanks so much.  That is a really good question regarding altitude.  I'm not sure if I mentioned it already but I had a similar thing (or so it seemed) happen to the other breast days before Christmas.  The difference was that within 2 days of it getting to the ultimate pain, it burst through a cyst and drained for 7 days straight.  The day it all culminated we were on Christmas vacation and driving through death valley, heading toward the Pacific.  That might support the altitude theory, that it crept up while at high altitude and burst when we came down to being BELOW sea level.  Really good question.  I'm going to try to remember to ask at my follow up appt.  And I know that having them burst is just asking for an infection but with this continuing since Mid January, I kinda wish it would burst like the other.  But there's no cyst anywhere nearby to facilitate a burst.  Is that good news or bad news???  If the doctors don't mention a treatment, I will definitely ask about that too.  I just assumed it was a "just deal with it" issue.  The good news keeps coming!!!

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  • Chevyboy
    Chevyboy Member Posts: 10,786
    edited April 2010

    Hi Aprilcotton!!!!!!  CONGRATULATIONS honey!  That news is the best!  I mean, about your biopsy!!!!  WOW!!!!!  Yes, write down all your questions & make sure you ask your Doctors everything you want to know.....Or else post them here, because you KNOW we will help you, Ha!  Thanks for your PM.....Sorry I haven't answered yet....but I loved reading about your traveling around, & being in the Springs!  I KNOW that area is full of wild-life!  We LOVE Manitou Springs!  We used to walk around there all the time, when we were visiting our Daughter & family in the Springs!

    Okay kiddo.....post again soon!  Love the great news about your negative biopsy! xoxoxoxo Jeannette

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