Dumbest thing my doctors have said or done
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Hear, Hear!
My favorite line from a health care provider (doc/nurse/technician/etc) is "I didn't think I needed to tell you that since you work in the healthcare field." WTF? I've never had cancer before, and I'm supposed to know everything and not need any teaching or support? Just because I work in healthcare? My standard response to that line now is "I hope you get treated the same way you treated me when you get cancer." Stops them cold and makes them think, especially the assumption that they will get cancer some day. One technician asked me how I know she would get cancer someday, I told her that since she works in the healthcare field she should already know all about that. She got my point.
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Native Maine,
Well said.
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Just found this board and the worst thing said to me by a medical professional - ok well several (LOL)
The oncologist started talking to me and when I said, "have you read my report" I have a copy of it right here. She stopped and asked me for my date of birth again. She looked at me, sorry, now let me look at what you have - are you kidding????
When I was in the hospital, the evening nurse told me, she did not think I needed to be in the hospital and I should be released. WOW - and when I told her I needed some pain medication she told me we do not push pain meds here. I said well if I wasn't in pain I would not be asking....
Olivia
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olivia--I hope you reported that evening nurse. What she said and did is totally inappropriate!
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I did not report her. I was just glad when she was off for the next three days. I was in the hospital for 6 days.
I guess I should have --
Olivia
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Adequate pain control is a patient right. It absolutely makes me crazy to hear about someone in pain and nurses and doctors not paying attention. I went through months of pain and couldn't get anyone to do anything or even believe me. It was horrible, and I just cringe to think of anyone else going through that. I hope the other nurses were more responsive to you.
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Since I was in the hospital during a blizzard the other nurses were so nice - they would come in my room just to chat and remind me to watch the clock because they wanted me walking and not in pain (smile) I had my own pajama's and I think they stopped by to see what I was wearing each day, so funny.
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Well, my PS is quite the character - he never seems to remember what I want, and goes by what HE wants - that is why I got 500 cc implants instead of the approx 375 cc I wanted.
Anyway - after my BMX with immediate reconstruction, about 2 weeks after - I kept telling him that my right breast felt very swollen and like "full" on the bottom and towards the armpit. He keeps saying "it's just swelling from the surgery, it will go down".4 weeks after the surgery, he starts debriding (all dressed in a nice pinstripe suit), and when he pulls on a piece of scab on my right breast, wooof!!! about a pint of yellowish liquid practically explodes in his face and on his nice pinstripe suit, drenching him. The whole bottom of the right breast was a huge seroma.
Dumb? You tell, lol
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I love this forum! My oncologist's nurse practitioner said to me 2 weeks before my mastectomy,
" Are you excited about the mastectomy, I bet you are looking forward to it!" When I let her have it, she repeated it! I reported her and she is not allowed near me. Unfortunately, she is allowed near others. My personal experience with a female surgeon has been incredibly positive!
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It has taken me a while to come to terms with the stupid, unhelpful things docs and nurses said when I had a clinical depression after diagnosis and during treatment. The nurse said to me, "why don't you bake a cake or something?" Like that was supposed to alleviate severe depression. A surgeon said to me, "If you were a horse, I'd bet on you" That was about my odds for recurrence.
When I was trying to decide about a double mastectomy, and was scheduled for a single mastectomy, the surgeon said, "Well, I don't know if I'll have enough time. I have a doctor's appointment at noon that I'm not going to miss." Gee, thanks for caring. She was an evil witch who I dumped after the surgery.
Then there was the doctor on call I to when I couldn't sleep for 6 nights-"How do you think the guys in Iraq feel?" Kind of like I was just supposed to buck up and straighten myself out.
I could go on and on. Under normal circumstances I think I could have stuck up for myself, and they wouldn't have pulled that $hit with me. The depression really threw me for a loop, and you would have thought they had no experience with it. They treated me like I was crazy and unreasonable.
Thanks for letting me vent...
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cathmg,
Can you change the doctors? What a bunch of narcissists.
As for the comment about our troops in Iraq, well they come home with severe post traumatic stress disorder. The suicide rate is for Iraq vets is the highest since records have been kept. Over 350,000 service men and women have diagnosed PTSD.
You are dealing traumatic stress and need appropriate help. Look for a support group in your area. Like so many other things, we need to take our care into our own hands.
Best wishes to you,
notself
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Thanks, notself, for your support! I switched surgeons for follow up, and got a new primary doc. My oncologist was great right from the start, thankfully. Strange how everyone was so floored by my depression-like they couldn't understand it. I only had my breasts amputated and had my mortality flashed before me. Oh yeah, and was poisoned and lost my hair. Geez.
All the best to you,
Catherine
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Reading this thread always makes me so thankful for my medical team, but Blarney - " Are you excited about the mastectomy, I bet you are looking forward to it!" I can't even begin to imagine what I would have replied to that flaming moron. Good for you for reporting her - we can only hope that somebody reamed her out good and she watches her mouth a little more closely now.
I have also had a very positive experience with a woman surgeon (also with a male plastic surgeon.)
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Cathmg----you had some horrible things said to you. Health Care professionals (or in your case the NON professionals) should have a counseling class before you can work with people dealing with a life threatening disease! Day from OKC, I think my PS might be the same as yours or at least related LOL! That is horrible and I am so sorry that happened to you, but secretly I am snickering that he found out the seriousness of your condition the way he did! Hopefully it was an Armani suit or something! Yesterday, I showed my PS a hard area where my tubes were---it actually feels like there is a lego in my right breast---and he got a bewildered look and said "I don't know what that is...lets recheck it in 3 weeks". Wow, I am really confident that he will figure it out! Of course, his response was better than the Medical assistant I usually see. She asked how soon I could see my oncologist....just what I needed to get my heart rate pumping. Luckily, she decided to have the PS see me and give me his (not so wise) opinion....anyone know any good PS in Tulsa?
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And why would anyone ask if you are excited about a mastectomy? Where do they get these people?
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In nursing school we stuff so much technical info into their heads that all the common sense gets squeezed out.
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I'm a medical social worker in the VA. Yes, I agree about our guys and women coming back with many problems, but they are getting quick excellent care. Can't say that about some of us with dumb docs. I spend a good part of my day undoing things said and done by some providers or just interpreting it for my vets. Many, many of them (providers) are great, but many many just have NO social skills. They missed that class while they were in medical school.
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Hi all Have been enjoying these threads for some time.
So yesterday I go to the hospital for pre-op testing (getting final recon Thurs). Mind you this is same hospital where biopsies and BMX were done as well as office of both BS and PS so ALL my info should be there. I get called in for my chest x-ray. Young girl tech asks me"so why are you doing this?" (meaning xray) I explain AGAIN (each person appearing to be looking at my file on their computer when they are asking me this) that having breast recon on Thurs. "oh" she chirps "so have you ever had any surgeries here before then" Yeees I had a BMX in August. "okay" she chirps again.
After she does xray she says in soft voice "did they do -um-something with your nipples when they did the surgery because I'm seeing something here" DUHHHH "yes" I reply "that must be the metal port you're seeing in the tissue expanders as I currently have no nipples!!" Oh okay that must be it then-have a nice day LOL!!! (not a doctor I know but thought it was good)
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Was she blonde? No offense to any blondes out there...I am also, but I am just saying.....LOL
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I have 2 stories. First not a doc but the head of cancer support department at the hospital. After diagnosis but before surgery in those weeks where I was having all kinds of tests, waiting for results, scared, etc., I went to the cancer support office because I wanted to belong to a support group or meet other women with bc. She wouldn't let me. She sat me down and acted very concerned about my diagnosis then told me about her 'scare' and said that she couldn't give me contact info of other bc women. I offered my contact info to her so she could give it to them and she said no. I can't put you in touch with any women until you know what kind of surgery you are going to have and have it done. I said "what??!! - I have breast cancer and need support." She said no, couldn't help me because I haven't had my surgery yet. I couldn't believe it and walked away in a numb daze.
2nd story: The day after my bi-lat mast w/recon, I still had that button to press for pain meds and was doing okay with it as I needed. For some reason one time, about a minute after I pressed it my chest inside all of a sudden got a really heavy and full feeling and I was having some breathing issues. I think it was one too many doses for my system, so the nurses were trying to help and gave me an EKG to be safe. It wore off after a while but it was scary. The next day my surgeon's PA came in to check on me clutching his clip board standing at the foot of my bed keeping a strange distance and asked how I was doing. I said "better" and he said "you know, you just had breast surgery so of course your chest is going to feel different."
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