Anyone Starting Chemo Jan. 2010?

VegasDiva · February 2010

Hi Ladies, well, this morning I had to go over to the hospital for my radiation simulation. No one told me that I would not be able to wear my wig during it. How embarassing, I took the dumb thing off and then had my Victoria Secret stocking hanging off my head. Not to mention the fact that I knew one of the cute male techs from my last round of radiation. I was humiliated. They told me I cannot wear a wig or even a cap during the treatment. lovely... I got 3 tatoos and will get 3 more when the actual treatment starts on 4/1. They made a mold of my upper body that I will lay in for each treatment. They advised against using aloe gel during the treatments. They suggest Aquaphor. I have used that before and it is great stuff.

Not to be a Debbie Downer but I agree with mslrg about them ever finding a cure for any kind of cancer. I remember when I was in college ages ago and having a pathology professor tell us that they will never find a cure for cancer because it is such a money maker. I totally believe that. Each shot of Neulasta costs over $7,000 and each of my TC treatments is close to $12,000. I can't even imagine what 33 radiation visits will cost! Thank goodness my out-of-pocket max will be reached by then.

I'm glad I'm finally in a good week here. Of course, that is because I had to go back to work! Hope many of you are having some good days now too.

friscosmom · February 2010

Thanks vegasdiva for some information on the radiation preparations. I won't be starting mine until July but good to sort of know what is coming.

I can't believe they don't even let you wear a cap over your head during rads. I mean, are you going to be butt-arse naked during rads? Seems you would have cotton covering you other places, like a gown or something, so why not your head?! I know, seems like a silly think to work myself up over so far in advance but I'm going in ready for a fight about keeping something on my head during rads, even if it's one of those hideous hair covers they give you during surgery. Aren't we degraded and humiliated enough during this whole process, I mean, what's the harm in a cotton head cap?! Were you given the option of tattoos? I've read up on that some too, many people insist on pen marks that get covered with tape so they aren't stuck with permanent tattoos? How big/noticable are the tattoos?

I hate to say it but I agree with you on the cure for cancer, there is no incentive for anyone to come up with a cure. The only ones that will benefit from a cure are those of us struck with the disease, for everyone else, cancer is their bread and butter, why would they want to cure it?!

faithfulc · February 2010

VegasDiva, I posted a thread on the Rads forum and it seems there are places that do not have a problem with wigs at all. Wondering if you could try to convince your treatment center otherwise. Good luck!

michelle_nj · February 2010

You Ladies are so funny; I have a good laugh reading your posts.

Ms LRG - You are a talented storyteller. And you have lots of energy, yoga class third day after treatment, that's impressive.
I'm confused about antioxidant foods too, even though my nutritionist told me to eat healthy foods, any, including tofu, and avoid just vitamins and supplements. I'm eating now some blueberries and thinking maybe I should just have an apple.
I still have too much hair (head and body) to wonder if that stray cancer cells are killed by this awful treatment.

Pagowens - I know what you mean by feeling an old lady. I feel the same plus I feel like I'm thinking and reacting slower. I too, can't wait for that heavy duty body/mind building.

Mom2Bnegativex3 - Congrats on your last AC. That's great! Hope you have no SE.
I had dmx, but I might need radiation (my radiologist appt is April 1) as my clear margin from the chest wall was .7mm. I'll try to avoid it, as I do this heavy duty chemo regimen to kill all that possible stray cancer cells. So why should I need radiation?

My ski trip was great on Sunday, sunny day with good snow. I'm ready now to face my last AC this Friday. I still have to decide if I should have Taxol X12 or X4? Anybody has more info about that?

Wish everybody a good day!

Issymom · February 2010

Sounds like several of us are having our last AC this week. YEAH!! I can't wait to be done with those drugs/poison. I have only had 3 days with no nausea (mild but still there). Sounds like that won't be an issue with Taxol. I am doing Tx4. I have wondered why/what the difference is. I asked the onc nurse last time and she said mostly convenience (less treatments). I think the SE will be worse with Tx4 but my onc says Taxol will be a cakewalk. I will be talking to her about Taxol tomorrow so if I get any more information I will let you all know.

Tamatar · February 2010

Good luck to all of you lucky girls getting your last AC this week!!!!! I have my 3rd this week and I am anxiously awaiting your Taxol Reports...keep me posted and congratulations on "graduating" from AC!!!! Cool

mslrg · February 2010

Hi Ladies, I had a slow start to the day, but my husband's cousin was showing up around noon to deliver tonight's dinner, so I figured I better get up and take a shower, put on some clean clothes and look presentable. Cheryl brought over a delicious Morrocan couscous stew, barbequed asparagus, ciabatta bread, and brownies for dessert. It was so delicious! We put all that in the fridge for later. So many people have said, ( as I'm sure theyhave to all of you,)"If there's anything I can do, just let me know." Trouble is, I don't feel comfortable asking for help, it just doesn't feel comfortable to me. But Cheryl just called up last night and said "I'm coming over tomorrow with your dinner" and we were all delighted. How have you ladies gone about asking for help? I just don't know how to do it. But if we could have meals brought over to us a couple of times a week, it would make such a huge difference and would be such a great help. We would even be glad to accept gift cards to restauants, it's just that cooking and cleaning up afterwards is such a chore when you're sick. I am going to make a big deal out of Cheryl's dinner tonight when I post on my CarePages for family and friends and hope they get the hint. That's what we need now more than anything.

After Cheryl left, I went for my Look Good-Feel Better Class. I remember how one of you on this forum had the experience of them canceling and not letting you know. Well, I thought that had happened to me because no one at the hospital had any idea about the class, and someone even told me it was last week. I walked all over the hospital and was almost in tears. I found the class 25 minutes after it had started. They got me caught up and I had a very good time. The information and free products were worth the trip. And being in a room full of bald women just like me was somewhat comforting. It's nice not to be the only cancer patient in a room. They are the only strangers I have ever revealed my baldness to, but in there, it felt safe--OK.

I came home and the family devoured Cheryl's dinner. It was nice not to have to fuss around in the kitchen--just heated the stuff up and everyone was fed before 5:30. What a G-dsend!

VegasDiva--so sorry about your humiliating experience. I would be right there wih you. They should warn you ahead of time about not having anything on your head, so you can mentally prepare. There's that 'human element" I was talking about again. For them, it's a just a job, for us, it's the worst kind of nightmare, with scary surprises and uncertainties, many of which strip our dignity and confidence to the core. A woman's head of hair is a really big deal--a much bigger deal for me now that I don't have hair. Anything we can be prepared for in advance helps.

Issymom--glad you're not having any nausea. Always a plus! Keep going and this chemo cap will behind us all finally.

Regarding medical research not encouraged to find a cure--I truly believe it too. There is way too much money being made on us. The pharmeceutical companies alone would fold overnight if they found a cure for cancer. They pump chemicals into us that they won't even touch unless they're gloved, gowned and masked, then they give us meds for the side-effects, then they give us meds for those side-effects, then they give us more meds for those side-effects, and we still feel like we've been run over by freight trains.What a racket!

Issymom · February 2010

Mslrg - This time around I only 3 days with NO nausea (11 days with it) but those days will end soon, hopefully. As for how to accept help from friends, meals have been the biggest help. My neighbor and good friend took it on herself to arrange meals. She coordinated with me as to when I wanted them. I get meals for the first 3 days of each chemo treatment. Even when I am feeling OK, it is nice not to have to spend the energy cooking. When people ask what they can do, many ask about food and I give them Carol's email address. That way I don't have to get involved in coordinating when or talking about what we like. That gets uncomfortable. I truly believe all the people bringing food love it. It gives them something to do to help. We all want to help people when they are in need. I feel guilty getting so much help. After this week, I will have had 21 meals provided by 19 different people. I am collecting the recipes from everyone and at the end, I am going to put together a cookbook to give back to them as thank you gifts.

It is hard for me to accept help and that is one of the lessons I am learning through this experience!

pagowens · February 2010

Hi All,

Wow - we are all nearing the end of the worst parts (I think) of these treatments. I hear HOPE in your written voices. How nice!

MSLRG - I was the one who showed up and the hospital had canceled the Feel Good program. I go again next Monday morning. Keeping fingers crossed for a different experience.

Taxol - I am signed up for 12 x Taxol, different from the first assigned regimen of 4 X Taxol. Mine changed for ONE reason, I am told. Because I am in a research clinical trial for Avastin and the Avastin dictated the 12 rather than 4 treatments. I was told I will simply get "less" Taxol each week. I wasn't provided any other reason. The Avastin trial is for studying non-recurrence in breast cancer; I don't know if the smaller bits over longer time makes any difference or not. Quite frankly, I feel two ways about it - darn that it will take a bit longer to complete, yea that maybe the SEs will be lessened as a result. I did figure out that it will cost a whole lot more doing the 12 weekly - here's why:

Each week I have to see the doctor on Tuesday afternoon. She only is in Mon and Tues. Each week I do Chemo on Wednesdays (because we started the week of MLK and the Avastin couldn't be delivered until Wed morning due to the no deliveries on Monday. The Wed protocol is strictly enforced now - can't change days). Then I go Thurs afternoon for Neulasta (don't know if I still do this with Taxol). So, rather than ONE office visit every other week so far, I incur THREE visits and have to pay my 3 co-pays. And, I am sure, the dr office charges my insurance for the three rather than the TWO that would have been if I wasn't in the research study. Now, rather than 4 taxol visits (or 8 charges) there will be 24 visits (or charges) (Tues afternoon see the doc; Wed get the treatment for 12 weeks) .

Now I know my onc didn't do this on purpose since everyone else in the place is on the one-day a week plan....but - HEY! Talk about making money! Thank goodness I have state health insurance and only a co-pay of $10.

That being said, last week when I arrived for my Neulasta shot, there was a gentlemen in front of me signing in. I realize HIPPA means no one should have been talking behind the counter but the one medical clerk said to the receptionist. "Hey, don't charge him; he's charity care." So, at the least I felt good that someone without insurance was getting good care. I stopped winging about my extra $10 payments. I hope the guy has a long and healthy life post-chemo!

I know nothing about radiation and can't even focus on it until all this stuff is done. I did read some of the postings in the "starting Radiation" in January thread and then decided to stop. Why worry about skin peeling when I'm still dealing with chemo SEs? My worry-meter is getting worn out, so I've been cutting myself a break and putting that stuff on the backburner.

RE Help. I have also had many offers for help. It is hard to say Yes - here's what I need you to do. Early on when I was recovering from surgery a co-worker decided she was going to bring me a meal. She arrived outside my driveway, signaled to turn in and got hit by a Strohmann Bread truck. Yes! I heard the crash, had to call 911. Thank goodness, no one hurt. But, quite frankly, I felt really bad. I haven't asked anyone else to bring me food. If she had been hurt or worse.....you could imagine the guilt factor in that! After that I asked my cook-son to come stay during MLK weekend and we cooked and vacuumed sealed and froze nearly 30 meals. I now turn down offers of meal-help saying I have plenty!

I have needed help regarding my grandson. Yesterday day care called around mid-morning and said he threw up and had diarrhea and to come get him. Brought him straight to the pediatrician and called my "sick care" help right away who came and took him as soon as I got home. He's gone now for a 3-day visit to Pop-Pops house. That's a big help and one I do call on. I don't want to wind up in the hospital with an infection. So, I guess we have to decide what kind of help helps us best during this. I'm grateful that my old ex retired in December and volunteered to be grandson back-up. Several other folks have volunteered to help with grandson on weekends....so, I do take them up on that.

I feel good today and am planning to actually get some stuff done around here. Yesterday I slept the entire afternoon and night away. Enough of that!

Pat

Anonymous · February 2010

I've been reading the posts but have not written in awhile.I feel so fortunate to be in a group with such wonderful, sharing, encouraging, honest, and supportive women. You have all touch my life more than you will ever know.

For the most part I feel great in between 3 week A/C sessions (with the exception of the 5 -6 days post chemo). I signed up to do the 3 day in November which really keeps be motivated to get out and walk everyday. I've read a couple of really good cancer books -The Anticancer Diet and Crazy Sexy Cancer. I recommend both. I also ordered a "F*ck cancer" hat from Jackiefarry.com. I'm not quite sure where it would be appropriate to wear the hat but what the heck.

MSLR

I too have a very difficult time asking for help. I'm with Issymom and delegated the coordination to others. I have one friend, one coworker and one family member each coordinating meals and/or groceries. I'm so humbled by the support my family and I have received from everyone. People I don't even know are bring over delicious dishes, flowers and hats. It is such a relief to not have to worry about major grocery shopping and making dinner every night. Our household tends to be pretty crazy with both parents working, 2 active teenagers and a new house that is still under construction. Sometimes I think the stress of building a new house is the cause of my flourishing and spreading cancer cells.

Issymom · February 2010

I just got back from LAST AC treatment. I started out feeling poorly (nausea) and thus still am. My onc suggested I take Prilosec each day for the 14 days or so of SE. She said that the nausea is not the same as the first 5 days of nausea and it is something to do with the lining of the esophagus or something like that. Anyway, I am thrilled to have something that might stop this yucky feeling.

As for Taxol, I will be taking 4 DD treatments. She said that it really is a personal choice as to 4 vs 12 treatments. The total amount of Taxol will be the same in the end, its just how much you get each time. One advantage I have heard is that many women on the 12 times treatment see hair growth start during that time. For me, I am happy only going 4 more times and that I will be done at the end of April!!

Pagowens - I will not be having Neulasta with Taxol as it does hit your counts nearly as bad as AC maybe you will only need to go twice a week.

gramoflexus · February 2010

Hi Ladies , finished up last AC treatment , now on to 4 treatments of Taxol . I have several questions . anyone have their first treatment of Taxol . Were the SE better than AC . also has anyone lost their eyebrows and lashes yet , Mind are thinning but still there , Yippee . Another question when anyone of you were diagnoise did anyone have the PET scan . I know you have to do things in steps , Is this something that will come later like after radiation . I have to be real and I know that 9 nides were involved I feel that I will be blessed and the chemo . radiation will get anything , but it is still the piece of mind knowing that the cancer is no where else . Does anyone have these concerns ?

wren22 · February 2010

lssymom and gramoflexus: Congrats to both of you for finishing the AC!! One more step of the journey behind you now. My final treatment of TC is March 11 and I actually find myself looking forward to it! But between now and then my oldest daughter will turn 17 and my youngest daughter (who is 9) has a piece in an art show in Columbus, Ohio that we will be going to. I am simply thankful that I will feel well enough to celebrate with them!

youngmomof3 · February 2010

Hi ladies,

Well I have been reading everyday but finally have enough energy to post. Had TCH #2 last Thursday and have been very tired, weak and emotionally exhausted! this was a rough week for me. Hair was falling out and by Sat I was a mess. Sunday I decided that enough was enough and my sister-in-law came over and shaved my head. My DH and kids were with me althought the boys seemed unfazed that mommy was sitting in the kitchen having all of her hair shaved off. my 16 month old daughter kept looking at me like she wasn't sure who I was but the I would smile at her and thankfully she smiled back. DH was amazing as always. kept smiling at me with his reassuring eyes. Cannot begin to imagine what all of this is like for him. My boys said I looked beautiful in my wig but it all feels so weird to me. Want to hide my head but also feel it is quite a pain in the butt to do so. I am feeling incredibly vulnerable right now. No security blanket(ie hair) to hide behind. Went back to work today and was sporting my new wig and couldn't wait to get in the car and rip it off and put on a nice scarf.some good news, onc said he couldn't feel lump #2 and lump #1 has shrunk from the chemo:) whoo hoo!!!

mslrg: so sorry to hear about your last infusion appt. you really are quite the trooper but it is a shame that you and other people have to deal with that. so glad that at least you got your Emend as a "party favor". that is some good news. Also have a very hard time asking for help and have felt uncomfortable when people ask me what they can do. just wish they would dowhatever they want or are comfortable with so that I don't feel like a charity case. it is so strange to be on the receiving end of things. I'm with nkrun, having meals made makes life so much easier. every mon & tues teachers in my building sign up to bring in a meal and on chemo day a woman whom I know but am not really friends with drops off dinner. I have to admit we have been spoiled over here with people's thoughtfulness. DH's best friend had a cleaning service come last weekend which was awesome. and I just love coming home to a card or small gift from someone.B/c of all of this I know that I need to make sure to do the little things for people in need b/c they truly make such a difference esp in one's spirit.

issymom: love the cookbook idea and may need to borrow it myself.

michelle_nj: I am also in NJ, what part are you from?

Paxton: I hope your benefit went well. I am with you on feeling like other people need to take care of your baby(which by the way is too cute!). on chemo weeks I need a babysitter(aka mom-in-law)to babysit my kids while I am here and I hate it! It sucks there is no doubt about that but I have to tell myself that next week or a few days from now I will feel better and be able to be the best mommy I can in those moments. I wish you the best with your scans and will be sending prayers your way.

So happy for all of you that are finishing AC soon and hoping Taxol treats you much better. Preparing for another possible snowstorm here in the northeast and am sooo ready for spring. Can't take another freakin flake!!! Also looking forward to a girls night on sat down the shore with all my girlfriends from high school. have to check with onc to see if I am allowed a glass of wine.

Happy Wednesday:)

mslrg · February 2010

Hi Ladies--a rough day for me today. I have had rectal bleeding since 3rd TC on Friday and they finally decided to have me come in today, even though I've been calling since Saturday. had a CBC, with a promise someone would call me back with results, but they didn't and it's now past 7:00pm. Stmach cramps and just plain miserable from the chemo. This too shall pass!

gramoflexus and issymom--glad you're past one part of this! Any milestone of progress in this journey is something tobe glad about.

Thanks to all on suggestions for getting help. I made a big deal of Cheryl's dinner on carepages last night, but the only responses from those who would love to bring dinner over, but can't, are those who who live out of state or country. I'll be a patient patient and see what gives For tonight's dinner, I was able to drag a pre-seasoned chicken dish I made last week, from the freezer and bake it. Thank goodness for that!

michelle_nj · February 2010

Hello Sisters,

Thank you all for the Taxol info, I might as well try to get the x4 dose to finish it sooner. Even though it is coming, for me, with Neulasta, compared with X12 that doesn't. I was scared that a triple dose( x4) will increase the side effects, and make me unable to walk. But if you all can take it, I can give it a try.
Pagowens - Congrats for your last AC. Half chemo done. Yeah!!!.
Thanks for the tx info. How was your Sancuso patch? Worth trying?
Nkrun - Great books suggestions, I just ordered it too. I like to read everything that might help me win this battle.
Issymom - Congrats on your last AC too, Yeah!!!! Sorry for the nausea. I know how bad it feels. I thought I'm the only one getting it that bad. Did Prilosec help you with your nausea?
Gramoflexus - Gongrats to you too on your AC. Yeahh!!!
I didn't loose my eyebrows and lashes. I don't want to disappoint you, but I read somewhere a post, on this site, where somebody complained of loosing eyebrows and lashes a few months after finishing chemo. Cry So I try to keep my optimism low on this. About PET, I had the same concerns as you and I didn't know you have to things in steps. So after I was diagnosed, I did do all the tests, including PET. The results were not very helpful for me. And now, after the operations I can say I am a bit disappointed with all this tests. I mean, my annual mammogram and ultrasound, done on the end of September 2009, were normal. Because of a very slightly nipple inversion, I insisted to see a breast surgeon, that did a biopsy on the spot and found cancer, ILC. I did after that all the tests. MRI predicted a 6.5 cm tumor. PET saw a very slight increased activity in the right breast plus same increased activity in the left and right axilla. Final pathology report, after right mastectomy with false negative SLN, followed by left mastectomy and right ALND : left breast benign , right breast multiple tumors, ILC and LCIS, the biggest 3cm; from 22 nodes just the right SLN positive.

Youngmomof3 - Whoo hoo on your shrinking tumors!!! Have a great girls night out on Sat. The nutritionist told me no alcohol, but I tried a sip of wine a few weeks ago, on a party and it tasted like a metallic soda.
I moved from Central Jersey to Jersey City a few months ago. What about you?

MsLRG - I hope the bleeding stopped and you feel better today. Take care!

I read yesterday about radiation therapy and I got a bit scared reading this newspaper article
http://www.nytimes.com/2010/01/27/us/27radiation.html?pagewanted=1

Wish everybody a good day!

11tyBillion · February 2010

Hi ladies!

I finally caught up reading all of the posts again! I feel so blessed to have all of you strong, supportive ladies to come to when I feel down, or unsure. I am so tired of feeling scared or worried or sad that some days I jsut do not know what to do. Then I happen to catch a glimpse of myself in the mirror, and it is all I can take.

I have a question for the ladies out there who have a port. For the past few days, it seems as though the whole port area has been nagging at me. Not pain or anything, just nagging -- like my body KNOWS it is there, and DOES not like it one bit. Soemtimes the creepy feeling is onthe side of my neck, sometimes it is where the port is ... It is like a creepy crawly feeling. There is no pain or anything (thank goodness) but I am so apprehensive to call my Dr. about this becaue I do NOT feel like having my husband take yet ANOTHER day off work so I can go in, and have my Oncologist look at me like I am freak worrier woman. Does anyone else constantly feel their port and the tubing ... or is it jsut me and there is something wrong? I have been wondering if the nerves are healing in my chest from teh mastectomy, and perhaps I am having weird sensations from that? I would get a weird pinching feeling for a few seconds every other day or two under my collar bone, but I dont think there is any port tubing way up there ... ugh ... i jsut fell like every ache and pain is making me a basket case.

I am going to ask my Oncologist about the pros and cons of Taxol x 4, because I was not even given the choice ... I am supposed to be doing the T x 12. Thank you all so much for your input, and posts.

stlcardsfan · February 2010

Hi all - just had #3 of TCH today. So this is the 1/2 half point for me on this round.

my lump is now down to the size of a small acorn as the doctor put it. So it has shrunk at least another cm if not more. Lumpectomy looking like a real option for me, as at this rate, the damn thing will be gone by the time I get to #6

This time, I was given a private room. It is completely luck of the draw what pod or room you get. Depends on when you sign in, and when something becomes available. The good news is is that I have the same Chemo nurse as before. So the rotate too amoung the pods and private rooms.

Port worked like a charm for the blood draw, so glad I have it. I can actually feel my ports tubing, it goes above the collar board, and into the large vein in my neck. But never had a creepy crawly feeling.

The only thing that has been bothering me since the last chemo is my neck muscles. I asked the Dr about it today, and he told me not worry. It appears that this is the area of my body that is seeing the most white blood cells regenerate from the Neulasta shot. Some people have the sore spots on the back of there head, some there spine, me - it is my neck.

mslrg · February 2010

Ittybillion--yes, my port feels just like you say. It really creeps me out sometimes! I amalways aware of it. Ick! Know how you feel about this being all too much sometimes--I'm in that place myself right now and it sucks! Cancer is not for sissies, that's for sure! I have new respect for every cancer patient I ever knew!

Stilcardsfan--glad you have this halfway behind you and that--and it's good news that your tumor is shrinking. Well done

riverview817 · February 2010

Hi Ladies

I've been a little absent this week, but with good reason. I felt great and was busy getting caught up at work and playing with my kids all weekend! I saw my onco before my chemo on Friday and he took out one of the premeds in my order that the nurse was giving me that he said he didn't order. It was for anti-nausea (I think). He said with weekly Taxol you don't really need it. Well, without that drug I didn't get so constipated (sooooo much nicer to have your digestive system working!) and my headaches lessened quite a bit. So, I felt like I had almost no side effects this last treatment. ...hoping this Friday goes as great!

My hair starting shedding about 12 days ago, not bald yet...getting closer though. I had it cut super short, but not shaved yet. My scalp hurts sometimes...hot and burning. I put an ice pack on my head at work on Tuesday for awhile...ahhh felt so good!

I started working out again. It felt great to get moving! Nothing too crazy, but good.

My friends started a team for the Relay for Life coming up. We are called "Team Peace", we are participating in the Grand Rapids, MI event. It is great to see how many donations are coming in, people can be very giving even when times are tough.

Hope everyone is having a great Wednesday Keep all the good info, I've used a lot of tidbits from this discussion group! 5 more months to go! 2 months of Taxol and 3 months of FAC.

wren22 · February 2010

I, too, have the funky feeling from the port--especially right after I have chemo. Truly a creepy, crawly feeling that it is just THERE. Although I am so glad that I have it and it makes chemo so much easier, I will be thrilled to get rid of it! Glad I'm not the only one who sometimes feels like I'm losing my sanity.

mslrg · February 2010

riverview--enjoy those good days with your kids--and minimal side-effects are always a plus! Cheers for you. I can be a little less jaded when someone isn't suffering from this so severely. Light at the end of a long and dark tunnel!

I am still bleeding. And onc nurse says it's just another side-effect of chemo--intestinal cells are very vulnerable to chemo and blah,blah, blah!" Easy for her to say! I feel like I'm burning from the inside out! I have been in contact with Cancer Treatment Centers of America--I want a 2nd opinion. It's just too difficult for me to wrap my head around this "treatment" being good for me when I feel like it's killing me! I IM'd with one of their reps and have been given some links--If I find anything interesting, I'll share. The rep highly-recommended nutritional support and supplements, so I will be calling to speak to their cancer patient nutritionist tomorrow for sure. I know I'm doing lots of good stuff for nutrition, but maybe there's some stuff I can tweak. My mouth tastes like I'm going to vomit up mercury right now! Disgusting! Hope he rest of you are faring better.

wren22 · February 2010

Just wanted to share an uplifting story tonight. I sent my oldest daughter (she will be 17 next week) to the grocery store this evening. The youngest went with her--so nice when they get along. Anyway, she said there was an older lady in the parking lot who was struggling to keep her cart from getting away while putting her groceries in the car. (of course, we are getting more snow here in ohio) My daughter went over, helped the women hold the cart and get her groceries in the car. She told me, "Mom, this lady said the nicest thing to me. She said that she hoped God will bless me in a special way and it made me feel so good." I was so incredibly proud of her!!! She has been great throughout everything, always telling me that I look good and offering to help. I know that this can't be easy for her either. But it really made me feel like I am doing something right raising my kids--these really are the best kind of days no matter how crappy I feel.

mslrg · February 2010

Renee-- you should be proud. Kids don't get kind and thoughtful by themslelves--they have to be taught by example. Well done and be proud! I hope the lady's blessing comes to fruition--and that the blessing will be that her mom will enjoy a full recovery!

Just-Sher · February 2010

Wren- awesome Mom moment!! Definitely had to give you that warm and fuzzy feeling inside!

Ladies - I've mentioned before that I have made my journey VERY public and that has made a huge difference. People are willing and want to help, which is a very humbling thing to say the least. But here are some links that have been helpful... you may already know of them, but thought that I would post just in case you don't.

www.caringbridge.org this site lets you keep family and friends updated about your medical journey. You can determine who has access by looking at the author services sections. We decided that this was the best way to make sure that everyone has same information about my journey.

www.foodtidings.com A friend set up this site so that people could sign up to bring meals. We had meals everyday for a month during my surgery and recovery! It was so helpful with a husband who works a ton, and two very busy kids (ages 5 and 8). We've now started it again, so that we will receive meals for a few days during chemo weeks. You get to determine the days that you would like help. It lets you know who is bringing the meals, when and you can even include if you have any dislikes or dietary restrictions.

Just a side note with the meals. We've left a cooler outside our door, so that people are able to drop off the meals, for us to cook later. That way they won't interupt me if I am napping!

www.cleaningforareason.com This one allows you to get up to 4 free cleaning sessions while you are undergoing cancer treatment. The site says that you need to sign up daily. However, I found that by signing up once and then getting a letter from my onc, sent it, the process was put into place. It does take a bit for them to find cleaners in your area, but it it well worth it.

www.lookgoodfeelbetter.org I know some of you have already gone through this one, and again, I can't say how nice it was to be able to learn how to put makeup on again!

I've also found www.networkofstrength.org to be yet another helpful resource. They can connect you with a breast cancer survivor! Yea! Survivors!!

Okay, just needed to share today, hopefully, you will find something helpful!

Have a pocket full of sunshine day!

~Sher

mom2Bnegativex3 · February 2010

WOO HOO Youngmom. What is your next step? I did my four a/c and now willgo in fora bilatmx then willhave my 4 taxol.

ahh how great for you, Wrenn, that is how I feel. My girls have not even fourght they are nice and helpful. The see that I have limitations but we all go a long as best as we can.

Oh Ms Lrg you have had such a rough time. I hope everything is better for you(()).

Riverview. How great for you. I am just in the process of getting a team together for relay for life. I want to do the 3daynext year, (got to pay them doc bills first). Any tips that you can give me would be great. So you are on Taxol now? And loosing your hair? What other SE do you have?

PauldingMom · February 2010

Just popping in to say Great Job Ladies!!! Ya all sound so AWESOME!!!

I started the Topic on Starting Chemo in July. If you go to that topic you will find a list of Freebies for people going through Chemo. due to B.C.

You're all very brave women and you WILL get through this. Hind site 20/20 I know.

mslrg · February 2010

You've all been so wonderful and encouraging, and I appreciate all you. Thank you so much! You just don't know how much your comments and suggestions help! I still feel quite ill--like I could vomit mercury and sweat lead! Wish I could be more clearly descriptive, but I just can't find the words--this is a really nasty, toxic feeling--and I have nothing else to compare it to! I've had a couple of hangovers before, but that doesn't even come close. I imagine Chernobyl nuclear fallout victims must have felt somewhat the same as I feel now--a definite sense of having been badly-poisoned. Every part of my being, every pore seeps chemo ick, and it is the most vile, disgusting, debilitating feeling. My insides feel like they have been subjected to a chemical burn. I am weak, and my stomach probably won't forgive me for this, ever! Yes, I'm riding the storm, and yes I will probably get past this, but I am digging more deeply for inner 'j'ne sais quoi' than I have ever dug before! But what a bloody effort!

My DH is still very ill and decided to stay off work again today and tomorrow. If you know DH, you know he must be feeling pretty bad to be missing work! I can't remember the last time I saw him so sick. I think my illness takes its toll on everyone in the household and that thought wears me down. My 9-year old's teacher contacted us to say that he's been very 'needy' at school. He seems to want a lot more of her attention and time. Given the fact that the teacher's about as nurturing as a slab of concrete, even on a good day, I worry about him. I see the concern for me in his face and in in my older son's, and feel guilty that my children are also having to suffer because I have cancer. They don't deserve this.

But I am also very blessed. I have never walked 60 miles in 3 days before, and thought it would be a good idea to find a local team to join for my Susan G.Komen walk in San Francisco--people with whom I could train when I get better. 60 miles in 3 days is something I will have to work up to, even if I hadn't been treated for cancer. I found a Sacramento 3-Day/60 Mile team called, "One Step Closer". The team's leader, Judy, is a mover and shaker of a woman, who has done this before, and someone I have never met. She walked last year for a 10 year old girl, named Hannah, who was a breast cancer patient. Yes, 10-years old! The youngest known person ever with breast cancer. This little girl is now 11 and in full remission, but she lived through a year of hell last year, much like we are living now. If a 10-year old can endure, then... ? I emailed Judy on the day I had my 2nd chemo, but didn't hear back--somehow, the email disappeared into cyberspace. Last Friday, when I was getting my 3rd infusion, Judy contacted me again, and we exchanged a few emails, I officially joined her team, and we spoke on the phone a couple of times. Judy was willing to accept me as a team member, with open arms, even though I'm on doctor's orders not to walk far or fast until my heart palptations get under control, which won't hapen until my red blood count is restored to a normal level, which will take at least 3 months after chemo is over and done with. I told her that my friend, Lori, in Idaho was also a registered walker and she urged me to invite Lori to join. I shared her info with Lori yesterday, or the day before. Between our conversation on the phone on Monday, and this afternoon, Judy had been in contact with Lori, and the two of them had planned for Judy to bring dinner to my house. A complete stranger helping me! How cool is that? I think that's pretty darn amazing! Lori lives in Idaho, and Judy has never even met me before in person, yet, they pulled off this remarkable feat! I am so humbled! My entire family is humbled! Wow!

Ezscriiibe · February 2010

Ms.LRG, hugs to you. Plus, you know you don't HAVE to walk the entire distance. No doubt set it as your goal, but keep in mind, that ANY distance you complete is a personal win.

Tamatar · February 2010

Hi Everyone,

11tybillion - I have a power port and the surgeon that put it in placed it amost near my armpit. The nurses all know that when they see me that this is the doctor that put in the port...he is known for this placement. The reason he does this is for patient comfort. It is places so that my bra, seatbelt, arm movements do not irritate the area. I have not felt anything strange other than the taset in my mouth when they flush it.

mslrg - So sorry that you are having a hard time! I have don't know about Cancer Treatment Centers but it is always a great idea to get a second (or third) opinion if you are not happy with your treatment.

I had my third AC (of 4) today and am feeling pretty good. They give me Aloxi, Dex, and Emend before they start chemo and then I take Emend, Zofran, and Dex for days 2 and 3. I have compazine as a "back up" but really haven's used it. I have been very fortunate to just feel tired rather than "sick". I did have an issue with constipation, but I am taking a senocot once each day and eating Activia Yogurt and things seem to have straightened out. Before that the constipation caused me to get hemorrhoids (that I haven't had since I was pregnant 10 years ago). I found that the preparation H was horrible an burned...so I sook a few hot baths ans switched to plain old vaseline and that really cleared it up. I know too much information, but if I knew about the baths and the vaseline, I would have started it sooner!

I wish you all a great weekend...I am SO TIRED OF SNOW here in the Chicago suburbs that any sunny day is welcome! And the good news is that the days are getting longer! Come soon spring!

Take care everyone,

Tammy

Anyone Starting Chemo Jan. 2010?

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