Seventeen years with stage 4 today

24567

Comments

  • lukejessesmom
    lukejessesmom Posts: 598
    edited January 2010

    Tears are dripping on my keyboard as I read your post.  By far, this has been the most inspirational one for me.  The fact that you have managed to hold on to hope after all this time reminds others that without hope, we have nothing.  I have found joy this year by continuing to be an active, participating mother to my sons, 12 & 14, who lost their Dad in April 2008, just months before I was diagnosed stage IV at first diagnosis.  They are very active in sports, and last year, as I watched them play, I would sit in the stands with my balding head, wondering if I would be in the crowd cheering them on in 2010.  And, by the grace of God, I am.  I know I am blessed, and my quality of life is probably better than a lot of people who are not dealing with cancer.  I have hope, and I have faith.  And in fighting this disease, you are lost without these two things.  May you continue to be blessed.  Thank you for sharing your story.  

    · Share on Facebook
  • 33skidoo
    33skidoo Posts: 1,029
    edited January 2010

    This is SUPER-DUPER Good News!  Thanks for pumping up my supply of hope.  I was feeling pretty surly yesterday.
    Claire

    · Share on Facebook
  • candie1971
    candie1971 Posts: 4,820
    edited January 2010

    congrats!!! always love to hear GOOD news!!!

    · Share on Facebook
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Posts: 1,376
    edited January 2010

    Kathy, that is just awsome news.  It really does give hope to us all.  I am hitting my 2nd cancerversary in February.  It's weird that time goes by so quickly for everything else in our life and yet we wonder how many more years will we get.  I don't want time to fly by as there is so much living to do and yet I feel two years has dragged by. It feels like it's been a lot longer.  Anyways, Congratulations and here's to the next 17 +. 

    · Share on Facebook
  • Godsgal
    Godsgal Posts: 203
    edited January 2010

    Kathy, thank you for the hope you just gave me. I Hope and pray to GOD that I am blessed in this manner. Jan 8th 2008 was when I was diagnosed with mets... May GOD continue to bless you my dear sister..

    Hattie 

    · Share on Facebook
  • mason204
    mason204 Posts: 570
    edited January 2010

    Congrats, Kathy! 

    Very well put.

    You asked where we've found joy over the past year, let's see:

    **Seeing my oldest daughter become a teenager.  She was 7 when I was diagnosed and I didn't think I'd live to see the day.
    **Also seeing that same daughter grow to 5'9" tall and becoming taller than me
    **Watching my youngest daughter make the Select baseball team last summer - beating out 30 other boys who tried out (you go girl!)
    **Seeing my youngest get her Brown belt in karate
    **Getting my doggie
    **Hearing my husband play organ at a major downtown church
    **Travelling
    **Joining a gym and working out like everyone else (yes, bone mets and all)

    I keep a list of "goals" and things I've done and seen in my journal to read during those "dark days".  It is amazing how one forgets the good things in times of darkness.

    Keep in mind I've been in chemo during most of those accomplishments.  It doesn't come easy but there's still joy there.

    Hey, I'm only a year and a half past my Stage IV "expiry date".  Six years with cancer - I'm still a "newbie" compared to you!

    Cheryl.

    · Share on Facebook
  • konakat
    konakat Posts: 6,085
    edited January 2010

    Thank-you Kathy!!!!!  What a wonderful post.  Shouting yippee from Ottawa!

    · Share on Facebook
  • jeanne46
    jeanne46 Posts: 1,941
    edited January 2010

    Thanks Kathy for your inspiring personal story of HOPE and of LIFE.  Yes, cancer can really get in the way, cause lapses into that darkness to which you refer, and sometimes render us physically wiped out. But to know that it's possible to bounce back, to continue onward, to keep LIVING is a wonderful gift.  You go girl.

    This past year I had the opportunity to travel to Israel (number #1 on my bucket list) to spend some wonderful days with my DH and adult kids by the Pacific seaside, to drive through New England at prime leaf peeping week, to spend a pajama party night with my oldest friend talking through the night in matching pajamas about old times and laughing at our memory lapses, and to come in second place at a duplicate bridge tournament. Most of it during active chemo.  I need to remember those good days, as you suggest. Thanks again for your post.

    · Share on Facebook
  • Yazmin
    Yazmin Posts: 840
    edited January 2010

    Kathy36: Someone else already wrote what I was planning to write about you: You are a beautiful, generous person to be sharing this information, which is bringing so much hope to so many people. Congratulations to you and many, many, many happy returns.

    · Share on Facebook
  • joaniji
    joaniji Posts: 733
    edited January 2010

    I am shouting loud and clear for you!!  Having grown up in "staid" Boston I get your point, but now as a Midwestern, I can jump up and down for you.  I am so glad to hear that you have continued to live your life with productivity, joy and adventure.  You asked what made us happy, well YOUR post made me happy.  Thanks for sharing.  Many wishes for many more years of "relative" good health.  Thank you once again.

    · Share on Facebook
  • claygirl
    claygirl Posts: 356
    edited January 2010

    Hi Kathy,  

    You asked what have we done in the last year that has brought us joy.  So many things:  reunion with 2 best buds from high school, a week in the Berkshires eating seaweed and brown rice at a lodge that was somewhat reminiscent of the hotel in "The Shining" with sister Barb, Christmas with my wonderful daughters and their terrific husbands. And, because I want to make even more memories, I recently purchased a vintage airstream trailer on ebay so that my husband and I could travel the U.S. (I have to admit, I might have been under the influence of pain killers when I did this and am truly hoping I haven't just bought a rolling nightmare.)

    Thank you for sharing your story and giving us a chance to share our happier moments.

    Jackie 

    · Share on Facebook
  • donnabee
    donnabee Posts: 580
    edited January 2010

    Praise the Lord! Thanks to Ganesha, and all the minor gods & saints I've collected along the way for your glorious revelation.

    I am just now going out on disability, just a year out from dx. And looking forward to being able to be healthy enough to enjoy my free time. I am looking at it as a blessing. Who knows, I could have never gotten cancer, worked until i was 68, and broken a hip or something and never had a retirement with any sort of QOL.  So Bring It On. I'm ready to be still posting here  when i'm 70!! --donna

    · Share on Facebook
  • whippetmom
    whippetmom Posts: 6,920
    edited January 2010

    Bless you for posting this thread!  I shout with joy right along with you!  Cancer changed my life - and for me - it was for the better!  I do have more joy in my life now....

    Congratulations on beating this disease for seventeen years AND COUNTING!!!!

    · Share on Facebook
  • AuroraL
    AuroraL Posts: 33
    edited January 2010

    Thank you for a beautiful post. 

    (For those interested in her books, a simple search on Amazon.com will find them for you...)

    · Share on Facebook
  • mindfulness
    mindfulness Posts: 111
    edited January 2010

    Congrats and many thanks for posting your inspiring life story. I am in the middle of a vaccine trial, 3,000 miles away from my family, exhausted from all the daily poking and tests and along came your story..... again THANK YOU, THANK YOU for your words of inspiration.

    · Share on Facebook
  • Fidelia
    Fidelia Posts: 397
    edited January 2010

    mindfullness - 3000 miles from home and in a vaccine trial - that is tough here's hoping kathy's story will be yours 17 years from now :)

    Fidelia

    · Share on Facebook
  • nbare1952
    nbare1952 Posts: 247
    edited January 2010

    Congratulations.  You have no idea how much I needed to read a post like yours.  I get tremendous joy from my husband, children and incredible grandsons.  One of them turned two on Thursday and I was able to spend the day with him.  Thank you for sharing your good news.

    Nancy

    · Share on Facebook
  • chainsawz
    chainsawz Posts: 3,473
    edited January 2010

    Thank you so much for sharing your story so I know what is possible for us.  My family and friends have brought me great joy this year and they are why I want to fight for 30 more! 

    · Share on Facebook
  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Posts: 1,376
    edited January 2010

    Just goes to show ya that no doctor can put an expiration date (got that from the commercial for that cancer hospital...LOL) on anyone.  I say....never ask the doctor how much time's left...NEVER!

    You are an inspiration.  I have a huge smile on my face.

    · Share on Facebook
  • vickib
    vickib Posts: 1,184
    edited January 2010

    CONGRATS!!!

    · Share on Facebook
  • Kathy36
    Kathy36 Posts: 85
    edited January 2010

    These posts are like gifts. Everyone's good wishes and kindness mean so much. I wish people back the same thing you're wishing me--extravagant amounts of time, more time than you can know what to do with. 

     And I so love hearing the ways people have managed to seize joy: beginning a law practice, staying at the Shining Hotel 2, time spent with grandkids, being there as a daughter became a teenager. And the Ebay Airstream (!), and the pajama party with old friends, and going to the gym: damn the bone mets. I love these memories nearly as much as if they were my own: they're such good reminders of something I always need reminding of: this life can be okay. Keep those posts coming!

    Some answers to questions: I did go to India (for a year) and did indeed eat truckloads of tumeric, though the Indians believe that it's basil that fights cancer. So I ate a lot of that too.

    How I handled the cancer: My oncologist said I could only go over if I hooked up with an Indian oncologist immediately, for tumor markers and monitoring. Then I got there and discovered there wasn't an oncologist within hundreds of miles of the town where I'd landed. So I had to work out this relay system: once a month I went to have blood draw at a pathologist whose office was decorated with jars of fetuses and statues of Hindu gods. Lots of incense but no Bandaids, so I'd end up dripping on the floor. The pathologist would then airlift the blood to Bombay, where some lab would run the markers then mail him the results.

    All year, my poor oncologist had to figure out how to answer emails like: "I'm having pain in my right hip. Do you think that's from cancer, or from riding in rickshaws?" I will love him forever for working with me so I could go.  

    Fidelia and Alienroc: I say go to Nigeria or India or anywhere that's beckoning, if you can. You'll work out the medical details. If your instincts are prodding you, then do it. I had no real idea when I decided to go to India (and for a weird reason no less: I really wanted to try and learn the language) why I was so hellbent to go. Midway through, I saw exactly why I was there, and it had a lot to do with the cancer. It was the exact right thing to do, for reasons too complicated to go  into, but for the longest time, only my instincts knew that. My friends, for sure, thought I was crazy. Follow your instincts, if you don't already. They'll help keep you alive.

    Whoever wrote "survival doesn't have to be perfect"--thanks. I'm embroidering that one.   

    Fidelia and whoever else asked: The book I wrote about India came out in July. It's called "Dreaming in Hindi." 

    Mindfulness and Bmac: good luck with the scan wait and with the vaccine. I hope they both have great outcomes and Bmac, that it's not lonely being away from home

    Every single poster: THANK YOU so very much. 

    xoxo Kathy 

      

      

    · Share on Facebook
  • YamaMama
    YamaMama Posts: 179
    edited January 2010

    Kathy.... Thank you so much for this post!

     I'm not quite a year into my Stage IV diagnosis and I can honestly say there have been a lot of time full of joy since May.  I was able to see the births of two new grandsons. I was able to dance for hours at the weddings of two of my children also!  But this week I've fallen into that "black hole" and had a bit of difficulty climbing out.  I really needed to read your post. May you be blessed with many more years full of joyful moments! May we ALL see many years of those joyful moments.

    · Share on Facebook
  • LisaSDCA
    LisaSDCA Posts: 2,230
    edited January 2010

    Kathy, I saw your piece in a recent issue of Real Simple.  NO mention of the red devil or breast cancer in it at all!  I thought when I read your byline "You just keep on living your life, girl, and writing what you've learned about it."

    What an inspiring life you're leading. Me, I'd rather spend my year in Italy, learning to dream in Italian!

    Lisa

    · Share on Facebook
  • Kathy36
    Kathy36 Posts: 85
    edited January 2010

    Lisa,

    Andale!!! (Or however you say it in Italian...)

    Kathy 

    · Share on Facebook
  • KellyC
    KellyC Posts: 834
    edited January 2010

    Rock on ((((((((Kathy)))))))!  Yes!!! xoxoxo

    · Share on Facebook
  • heatherpalmerton
    heatherpalmerton Posts: 2,247
    edited January 2010

    Kathy, I have been feeling a little blue, It's been two years since the dx, but they think it had been there for a long while. It is great to hear 17 years. "SHOUTING OUT VERY LOUD""!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thank you for posting.  Heather

    · Share on Facebook
  • tania_s
    tania_s Posts: 80
    edited January 2010

    thank you, thank you, sometimes I get so scared of the near future, but if you have survived 17years already, you will continue to survive as so many new drugs and advancements have been made in that time.  You are great and I hope I can follow in your footsteps. Congratulations - you are marvelous.

    · Share on Facebook
  • faithandfifty
    faithandfifty Posts: 10,007
    edited January 2010

    Kathy. I read your post last night, upon returning home from my double mastectomy, drains filled to the brim and throbbing -- itching at every possible spot of skin.....

    Dark?

    I have named this chapter, "Cancer, The Sequel."

    This year has been an amazingly wonderful one for me...... and I have no idea, not even the slightest about living with Stage IV, I've just merely lost my breasts. While in grief today, I know that momentarily I'll regain my footing and dash off into my future.

    This year has brought us a sixth grandchild, the wedding of our youngest daughter (ask anyone I was stunning in my MOB dress-- mother of the bride) and the publication of my second picture book, a contract for a new project with a big educational publishing firm, and the invitation to embark on an exciting project for connecting BC women to one another.

    But as I think back over this year and my national travels in the midst of my second BC diagnosis, I am most grateful for having had a mini-week, to host a Stage IV sister and her family at our lake-side heaven. The happiest memories of silly nonsense together and sharing the flatbed of our pick-up truck rank right near the top of the high-light reel.

    Be bold in splashing your hope around.

    Be bold and brazen in your example.

    Be bold and brazen and brash in your shining encouragement into the darkness.

    And thank you from the bottom of my heart for reminding me that I will discover my 'newest normal' and walk confidently toward tomorrow.

    xx00xx00xx00xx00xx

    · Share on Facebook
  • spawn
    spawn Posts: 2
    edited January 2010

    Hi Kathy,

    I just started signing-up on t his website to look for comfort for my mother who has stage 3breast cancer. And when i bump into your blog and finish reading it, i couldnt believe it! You really gave us hope and inspiration here. And i wanna congratulate you for fighting against all odds. U must have suffered a lot i can imagine and u conquered! I will print this one and show it to my mother..

    God Bless you always...

    · Share on Facebook
  • Denny123
    Denny123 Posts: 1,886
    edited January 2010

    WOOHOO Kathy!

     7 1/2 year survivor here with liver mets.  5 1/2 year remission.

    You are my she-ro!

    Denise

    · Share on Facebook

Categories