If you have just been diagnosed....

Deanna,

Many, many thanks to you and your words of encouragement. You've been here. You know the torment and anguish. I've been staying strong and positive, but it's rough. I am deeply grateful to my doctors for being so damn persistent with me through the years. If I hadn't been monitored as closely as I have been then who knows how long it would have taken to find this thing. I am quite certain that once something is actually being done to fight (and fight I will) this I will feel much better. Waiting and waiting and waiting has been awful and I'm truly looking forward to my bilateral mastectomy/recon and whatever treatment follows. I won't be happy with chemo if I should need it, but I'm more mentally prepared for it. I'm the type of person who needs to think my way through it and convince myself that I can deal with anything. I can and I will. Of course I'm afraid, but who wouldn't be?

I will keep posting and reading. God bless all of you. We will all get through this. Fight on.

Hello ladies, Sorry you have to join us...but Welcome!!! Sounds like your both in good hands. Chemo really is not all that bad and if you're like me, maybe you will not loose all your hair. They told me within 10 - 14 days I would start loosing it. I am now on week # 8 ( 56 days ) and still have my hair. It finally started coming out 2 weeks ago, but just a little at a time. I still have 1/2 my volume. I had very thick hair to begin with. I may not even need to get a wig, maybe you will not either. If so, for either of us, I guess that's just one of the lovely side effects we get to deal with. When life throws you lemons......make marguerita's and invite me over....Take care ladies. God Bless

sharriad ~  I'm so sorry about your Mother's diagnosis.  I see that you've already posted on the Stage IV forum, which is exactly what you needed to do to get your questions answered by women with first hand experience similar to your Mother's.  On first glance, it sounds like she's gotten excellent advice to start on hormonal therapy, but you will get much more complex answers and information on the Stage IV forum.

The only thing I can add is, it's always a good idea to get a second opinion about any step of bc treatment. You and your Mother will find that not all oncologists or surgeons or radiation oncologists think alike about which treatment to use, and it's often wise, if only for reassurance purposes, to get a second opinion, as well as to read as much as you can to be able to make the most informed decisions.  It's also a good idea to be sure the oncologist she's using specializes in breast cancer, such as one at a major breast cancer center.  They are up on the very latest and will have access to trials that other oncologists may not.  If one isn't close to you, you can sometimes do a phone consultation.  And you can always take that information back to a more local oncologist for actual treatment.

I'm so sorry that you and your Mother have the need to be here, but I'm very glad you've found BCO.  Please tell your Mother that I will be praying for wisdom for her doctors and strength for the journey; and for you, too.   Deanna

To bf2009. I wanted to give you a bit of reassurance with your diagnosis and treatment. I have a very dear friend who was diagnosed with triple negative/fast growing BC 7 years ago. She could detect quick changes in growth as you did. She underwent surgery and chemo and let me tell you, she is doing wonderfully. She has been cancer free this entire time. She did what she needed to do, as you're doing. Yes, it was rough. It's never easy. But my gorgeous friend has more energy and more life than many people combined. It can be beaten. Have faith.

I hope that you are tolerating your first dose of chemo. My thoughts and best wishes are with you and the rest of the wonderful women on this site. God bless!

Kelly

Help,  I was diagnosed, 4 HOURS ago, with Infiltrating ductile cancer.  I'm 36.  I'm petrified.  I haven't even spoken with a surgeon yet.  The radiologist said the size appears to be .3 and it looks to be grade 1.  "Do you have any questions" she asks...  I have no idea, I just learned I have breast cancer!!!  I'm 36 and I'm scared.  I need to hear survivor stories!  I'm scared...  Did I tell you I'm scared.  Please help, I can't stop crying!  Oh god I'm scared!

Dear scubadiver73, I'm a newbie too.  Order Dr. Susan Love's Breast Book, she's the guru of breasts and like the other ladies here have told me, breathe, breathe, breathe.  Read everything you can and try to be as informed as you can be.  The more educated and informed you are, then you'll  have the knowlege to ask questions.  That I have learned in the last 3 weeks. 

Hello ladies, It is very scary at first. I've found the more you know the better off you are. Ask tons and tons of questions. When I was first diagnosed, I was like you numb, and didn't know what to ask. I was told by my BS to get a small notebook, and every time I thought of a question, write it down. Which I did religiously. I carried it in my pocket. Then take it with you on your next appointment. That way you don't get there and go, I had questions and now I don't remember a single one, that happened to me. I would be at work and think of something, so I would write it down right then and there or I would forget in 5 minutes. Or I would be looking stuff up on the net and go, yea, I want to know that. Welcome one and all. God Bless and God Speed.

Just diagnosed late November.  Stage I and with good prognosis.  I had my lumpectomy and sentinal node biopsy on Friday (Dec 4).  The initial prelims with the node were good and I am just waiting on the path reports now.  I am amazed at how much this consumes my thoughts even though I feel positive about my diagnoses.  I am so thankful for a place like this to come and express my thoughts and feelings.  I am 38 and also have extremely bad endometriosis and since my cancer is hormone + I can no longer take my LoEstrin which was keeping the endo somewhat in check.  I have only been off the hormones about two weeks and am already experiencing pelvic pain. Now I am having to consider a hysterectomy and am really scared and don't know what to do.  I have no children and don't really think I want to.  I really want to do what is best for me but it is so hard to know.  Anyone else been in the same boat with the endometriosis?

i was just told on friday the 5th of december. it was over the phone,and the way she said it and how was like she was signing my death certificate. it was harrd. i have had cancer before,had my thyroid removed 21 years ago. then while gettin ready for work i felt a pain,the only time and there was a lump. after mamogram ans ultra sound,they said it was a cyst,but on that cyst was something else. and now i am scared to death. i don't know if i am strong enough to go through this. i have 5 kids. 22 20 19 17 and 6. my 17 year old lost her dad at age 7 and is scared to lose mom. i have the ductal carsanoma. will visit with surgeon on thursday. anyone have any positive thoughts to help keep me positive.

I was there the week of Thanksgiving.  I had no idea something was wrong.  I agree cry now and when you least expect it, you will cry some more.  I think I didn't feel a sigh of relief until after I knew everything and now I have had one chemo treatment.  Still cry my eyes out when least expected but I am making it so far.  I see the oncologist finally this coming Monday.  I have met him and had all my test done but I have not seen the results yet other than what I was told.

You can do it and yes having a child makes it harder.  I have a almost 7 year old.

(((((HUGS)))))

Good luck sullykm, I understand totally.  I was just diagnosed and told I have to have a mastectomy and chemo, that I will see the oncologist on Monday to figure out what I have to have done and at what stages.  My problem is that I have been ill for many years with a connective tissue disease and arthritis, taking three injections a day and other medicines so that I can walk and drive.  Will they say I must stop that medication, but if I do, I'm bed ridden with in-home care.  So what to do.  Let the cancer spread because the doctors say it's invasive and the changes are happening rapidly from first mammogram to biopsy.  They are doing an ultrasound of liver and the complete body MRI.  How to choose quality of life vs. quantity.  I'm a single mom with teenagers, stopping my other medication for chemo and surgery means quality of life will go way down, and am I even strong enough to go through all this?  My immune system has been stripped down to nothing from the medication I am now on, what will chemo do which the doctors say I will need.  I will meet with a surgeon, oncologist along with so many other tests on Monday.  I wonder can I make such a decision without a considerable amount of thought and planning?  Everyone says you are such a fighter and so strong all the time, but this time I don't feel so strong.  Doctors called me six times today, I just didn't want to talk to anyone I asked them to allow me to figure out with my immunologist if I have to change my whole current medical plan, they said to me no one mentioned that you were taking such high doses of Enbrel and other immune suppressant medication.  So I'm confused and worried, and just tired already.  

I want to be singing Christmas Carols all day, my youngest daughter laughed and said "mom, I'm sorry to say cancer will not make you a better singer...",   I had to laugh and remember that there is something to learn from all this and try to look at the lighter side of life.

May all of you have a Happy and Healthier Holiday Season and a New Year filled with love, laughter and cancer free. 

I was diagnosed with DCIS a week before Thanksgiving and I have met with a breast surgeon. She suggested a mastecomy because the cancer cells where found in three ares of one quadrant near the perimeter. Last Thursday I met with the plastic surgeon that the breast surgeon recommended to me. He recommended inplant. I was not a candidate for any of the flap reconstruction because of prior surgeries to the abdomen (C-section and appy) and because if weight issues. So now I'm in the process of getting a second opinion for a breast surgeon and plastic surgeon. The breast surgeon I saw was Dr. Ericka Brinkmann from Holy Name Hospital and Dr. Tvzi Small in Paramus. Dr. Debra Small and Dr. Steve Dudick have been recommended to me and they both have priviledges at Monmouth Medical Cener in Long Branch. If anyone has experience with Dr. Camal and Dr. Dudick, I would like to know what you thought of them. Thanks in advance.

toni

Hi ladies I have just been diagnosed with beast cancer. I am going and see the specialist on Friday. I am afraid  to go . What do they do on  the first visit and  Should I take someone with me?

I went  for my first visit  to the doctor  on Friday and  Now i have to decide if i am having the lump removed  or  the all breast  taken off  . I have  my tell the doctor .what i want done  on Dec  31  for they want to do sugary  around the 7 of Jan

cargiver ~ Which type of surgery you choose depends a lot on your individual bc stats -- type of bc, size of lesion, hormone receptors, etc., as well as your degree of comfort level with each type of surgery.  Many women will do anything to keep their breast.  Others choose to have the more radical surgery.  It's a very individual decision, but if you want to share any of your thoughts here or in a Private Message (PM), we might be able to help you think it through. 

I started out with a lumpectomy.  When I later found out I absolutely needed a dreaded mastectomy (long story, explained a bit on my bio page), the one thing that got me more comfortable with the situation was seeing pictures of reconstructed breasts.  Unless you specifically choose no reconstruction, which some women do, if you need or want a mastectomy, reconstruction techniques are very advanced these days.  I had a Diep flap, where they rebuild your brease with tummy tissue, and my breast is very natural looking.  Again, I'd be happy to chat with you about it, and there are also several threads here that pose the "which should I do" question with some great answers that might help you with your decision.     Deanna