So Now What???

Hi Shanagirl,

I STILL feel like this and it's been 9 months since my last treatment. I've been seen every 3 months and I'll tell ya,..I do good for about a month and half after an onc appt,..the other month and a half,.I'm very nervous,.anticipating my next appt. Will it be good news or bad?,.ugh. This whole "experience" blows! I am getting better though,.I feel great,.wake up every day and thank God I'm still here. I plan on being here till I'm old and wrinkley,..well,.old at least! lol. ' )

((Hugs))

Oh ya. A book that I read that helped so much.....Picking Up the Pieces, by Sherri MacGee. A book for cancer survivors and all the feelings of being dignosed,treatment and then moving forward.

I highly recommend!

Weesa - you just said exactly what I was going to say!

Shana - The most important part of your treatment is just beginning. You will be fighting this every day your take your Arimidex. I say a little "take that cancer" to myself every night when I take mine.

Again, don't expect yourself to be feeling any other than you are.  What you feel is exactly right for you, they are your feelings and it is OK to feel a bit deflated.

You know, I think we all have that magical finish line in sight through all of out treatments, it is the date we have been aiming for for months and months, through all our tough times. And then, finally you are there, and you don't feel like you thought you would.

Give yourself some time to relax and find your footing again.  Everything has changed, it will take a while to feel OK again. But you will!

i'll just congratulations again..

i thought it a wonderful milestone.. not having to go to the doctor all the time.

dear shana

i want to "ditto" what everyone else had said.  especially, give your self some time to get your "feet on the ground"  and allow your body to heal from chemo and rads.  the arimidex will work for you....you are still in treatment as you take your little pill.  i always felt secure while i was on the arimidex...thinking..wow...another good treatment for my cancer that lasts for 5 years..or longer.  in another 5 years they will have more information on these treatments...which is a good thing for us.

something else i did after i finished the rads and chemo.  i took "stock" in my life prior to being diagnosed and realized that there were a few things for me to "think" about and maybe change.  yes, i was different from going through all of this cancer business.  so, while i was healing...i decided to think about any changes i wanted to make in "how i was doing my life" prior to cancer diagnoses.

a few things i realized:  1. i was working way too much and not nurturing my personal relationships. 2. i wasn't as emphathic to others as i could be. 3. i didn't exactly take 'excellent" care of myself all the time. 4. i took a lot for "granted" in my life...and 5. i seemed to always be in a hurry. 

so, i set some goals for myself...not to be realized all at once but to begin working on . i won;t go into all my goals i set because it is too lengthy...but now, after 7 and half years...i have actually changed things...and i think have become a different person in how i do life and how i am in life.

i think "now what" is such a good question you have raised.  i find myself still asking myself "now what" as i continue to move forward. i think it is a good thing.

you will follow up with your doctor...there will be days where you will still feel that "cancer" anxiety..you can always go in and see your doctor..and will figure our your own way of dealing with this.  you have done great and your postings and questions are just so great to read....and gives me....and all of us things to think about. 

 let your body heal.  i finished my rads back in oct 2002.  i was growing hair...and allowing my body to heal over the Holidays...just like you.  i let people know..who were my "peeps"  that i was healing....and would be for awhile.  i educated my peeps. lol  i was happy to have  my tastebuds working for me...and that i wasn't spending my days at the rad place or getting a 'white blood cell" shot. 

so, hang in there. one day at at time. that is one thing i have gotten really good at; i have slowed down and have learned to "focus" on one day at a time...and just "being" and enjoying each day.

hang in there./ Hugs

diana50

 I know when I reach the point where you are (which is soon) I'll be having the same feelings - as they are starting to creep up now as I near my completion date. 

Glad you're feeling better today - a good walk on the beach with your "little" baby I'm sure will be just the thing to bring continued smiles........................