please help
Comments
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Best wishes to all!
Judie - there is a peace and calm in your post, I am so thankful for that...hugs and hoping you enjoy he houseful of family!
Lisa - so nice to see you back, glad the trip was good and really relaxing.
Cathi - hugs, hugs, hugs. You are in my thoughts and prayers, hoping all works out alright. Hold onto Ed, and take a breath You are such a strong woman and you'll get thru all this.
Sheila, Karen, Geebug and everyone - very best wishes for whatever is going on.
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Best wishes to all!
Judie - there is a peace and calm in your post, I am so thankful for that...hugs and hoping you enjoy he houseful of family!
Lisa - so nice to see you back, glad the trip was good and really relaxing.
Cathi - hugs, hugs, hugs. You are in my thoughts and prayers, hoping all works out alright. Hold onto Ed, and take a breath You are such a strong woman and you'll get thru all this.
Sheila, Karen, Geebug and everyone - very best wishes for whatever is going on.
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This is a little late and I can't remember if I said it before but Happy Thanksgiving to all my wonderful sisters in the US! xoxoxoxxo
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Ha - Meg - we must have posted almost at the same time!
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Hi Guys
Hope you all had a great Thanksgiving day.
Sorry I havent been on for a while, but started rads last week and it is so time consuming! It takes an hour to get to the centre and another hour to get back, longer if we hit rush hour. And at at 90 minutes waiting! I'm exhausted by the time I get home. and I have got his till the beginning of next year. Off Friday as the equipment is being serviced, so I can take my wonderful family for lunch to a fabulous Tapas restaurant called Cafe Andeluz, and get all the business things I need to get done in the morning.
Rads seem ok thus far - though I am already feeling a bit hot in the boob already. I am very, very white skinned. I was a bit freaked out when they told me to cream my back as the rays can pass through the body at the collerbone. Brought it home that it is a risky old process!
So lovely to read about your life and times. I am still very tired and pretty sore today, very achey and sometimes think this will never be over and the fact that you have all got on with your lives fills me with hope, it's great sharing experiences; hopes and fears.
I am very worrried about Cathi though, what you have been through this year!! What were your scan results? Like everyone else, I am praying for Amanda and baby Ella (I had a wonderful auntie called Ella, so she is named after one of the most wonderful ladies I have even known) How is Jacklyn? And NEED some more pics of uber cutie Margo. And your beautiful grandkids. They really are beautiful and the camera just loves them.
Lisa, I love your attitude!!! I wish I was more like you. Play the field and don't let any of them play with your feelings!! Remember that they are nothing more than a sub species with a few uses. Anyway, enjoy your life to the absolute full.
Normal service in the old waste disposal department slowly returning to normal, but I still need the banding op done when all the rads are out of the way. Can't believe how feeble I still am. Now that TAX is finished, I am developing the swollen ankles, the hair came out last weekand the nails are going to fall off. They are VERY painful now and coming up "bruised" Looks like I have caught them in a car door. Weird or what? And the achyness? I bounced back so quickly after FEC!!! TAX just about did me in, to be honest. I'm proud that I persevered. It was soooooo hard, but I thought I would be getting better by now ....... Been over a months since last chemo.
Anyway, moan over. Christmas is coming - got all my presents online, some bargains too, so that's taken care of. Thank God for QVC!!!
Signing off for now - wish me luck for the rest of me being fried!
Love, love and more of it
Nettie xxxxx
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Dropping by to wish you all well, post holiday meal or not, and of course to say a special wish for the continued uneventful recovery of you Sue. May your leg bones be re-approximating nicely and your pain level low and/or controlled.
Will you be out of the wheel chair soon and on crutches?
My best to you all,
Tender
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Sheila, So it took so long to respond - I have permanent implants and I still don't like the way the left breast looks - it was the one with the radiation. It didn't shape p very well.
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I think I am finally caught p on all the posts.
Mel, you are such a coll. You are a naturer, supporter, encourager, and an awesome mom and friend all rolled up into one. I don't think you ever forget anyone or anything and are always thoughtful.
Thanksgiving was great here. The kids and grandkids came and went as they pleased. I went Christmas shopping all by myself on Friday which I haven't done in many years. I went by my son's house and his fiance wanted to go shopping again so we did. We went back to his house and her mom wanted to go shopping so we did. I shopped 12 hours and the only time I sate down was in the car but it was truly great. I am trying to loose weight and really feel down on myself (due to my size and looks). Kim, my son's fiance's mom, took me to Victoria's Secret and made me buy something for me and no one else. She said , "sometimes you have to do things for yourself and accept yourself the way you are at this time whether anyone else does or not and once you do it is amazing but the weight starts dropping. I'm waiting because by the time I left the store I had spent $100.71 on myself which hasn't been done in years and it was great. I even thought of taking it all back but I haven't yet. LOL. I really need prayers and support in this area of loosing weight because it is affecting my outlook on life a little. I need to loose about 60 pounds.
Cathi, I am praying for you, Amanda and baby Ella. Lisa, I'm glad you are having a wonderful time.
Don and I are to go to Florida for the two oldest grandkids trip to Disney World. I'm not sure if I am going because I have too much work to do and because I have goten so big it gets hard to walk and not swell bigger. I am still having a hard time with my right arm and went to see another doctor for the pain. The new doctor decided it wasn't tendonitis but something with the nerves and wants to have my PCP send me to a specialist. THere are times that I wish I could just cut it off but that won't happen.
I hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving weekend. I'm a little tired from the shopping on Friday. LOL
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Hello All -
A quick pop in for me - hope all my fellow Americans had a great Thanksgiving!
UB & I are doing well, although he is still suffering from a bit of fatigue - we all know how that is.
Special shout out to Cathi & Nettie & our Sue - holding you all close.
Love you all,
AE
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Nettie, you have every right to be proud of yourself. You have had such a dreadfully hard time through all of this and your lovely spirit is still bursting out, even though you are exhausted and sore and sick of the whole process. I'm praying that you continue to have the strenght to endure and that the busy lead up to Christmas and the holdiday season will pass quickly and you will be done with radiation. I'm sure it's probably very normal to be still feeling pretty horrible only a month after chemo has finished. Gentle (((((((hugs))))))) to you.
Dink - good for you - buying yourself some pretty underthingies! Please continue to show yourself love and care. I believe in nurturing yourself when you have negative feelings. Have you ever read any of SARK's books or visited her website? I've always found her writings very encouraging and uplifting. She makes you feel good about yourself and that in itself is motivating. I'm praying that things will get easier for you and that you will have some small triumphs. Are you sure you don't have LE in your arm? I hope you can get some beneficial treatment for it soon.
Sue - I know you are extremely frustrated at having to lie around. Have you had the staples out yet? I hope it didn't hurt too much. May your bones knit together with great strength and speed!
Val - so good to see you post! Glad to hear you and UB are doing well. Hopefully, Bill's fatigue will lessen soon.
Tender, Lisa, Karen, Sheila, Meg, Shirlann, Elaine, Judie, Wren, Cathi and everyone - hugs and love to you all.
Jane xoxoxo
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Happy December 1st! the start of the craziness of Christmas.
I wish that more people would remember the reason for the season - The celebration of the Birth of Jesus Christ our Savior. don't get caught up in the 'presents' but feel the 'presence' of the Lord during this season and every day of every season!
Love, Sheila
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Shelia you are so right. While I truly enjoy the whole SANTA thing for the little ones, the wonder and excitement, we really have forgotten (as adults) the true reason for Christmas.
Just wanted to give a quick Ella update from Amanda's DR visit Monday, Ella has gained some weight - YEAH, aminionic fluid levels staying stable - YEAH, and looks as though as of now she will be arriving Dec 17th. Amanda has an Umbilical Doppler US on Friday @ 8AM, then back on 12/15 to see DR to firm things up, we are all just praying so hard this little angel will be born Healthy - this will be our true CHRISTMAS BLESSING for sure, and Shelia for us it is no doubt restoring the TRUE MEANING - XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO
Love you all - Karen stop worrying about me, God is very close at hand these days, he has taken the Helm and given me all the strength and direction I need at this time - LOVE YOU!!!!
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Cathi - you know that there is no way we will stop being concerned and worrying about you. Thanks for the good news about Ella - stable and weight gain are good things. My prayers are with all of you!
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Cathi, I'm so glad that God is at the helm!
Keep us posted, it's great to hear the good news... -
THANK YOU. I have finally realized after all these years of being a "WHAT IF PERSON" that I can't change WHAT IS, hell I proably can't even change WHAT WILL BE , so I am just going to now focus on the NOW and TODAY, Thats all I am guaranteed of having, Now don't get me wrong I haven't lost complete perspective and sanity
- IT STILL SUCKS, and I know in ample time I will need to do some $h _ T I am really dreading, but from now till then. I am following the Yellow Brick Road that is before me. One Brick at a time, first Brick getting Ella here. ,
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Cathi - I'm so glad you got some good news re Ella. Am praying hard for her and all of you.
Sheila - I agree! It's a crazy time of the year with huge pressure to buy, buy, buy and eat, eat, eat!
Love to all xoxox
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My my wonderful Friends across the pond.
Thank you for all your kindest of words - you are truly the best! I know all of this too will pass, and I am beginning to feel better, little by little every day. Ijust get impatient with myself. Expectation a bit unrealistic I expect. But my tastebuds are recovering, bowels are working (excuse me, but you ALL know what I mean, and the acheyness just left. Think it might have been a bug. thank you all. Almost at Oz, and just a bit tired because it has been a tiring wee journey.
Cathi, the best news! But, my dear, reading between the lines, you are holding back news about yourself and I can't help but worry. Love and hugs to you and your family, sincerely from Glasgow. Praying for you all.
Off to bed now, rads is bloody tiring isn't it. And the journey and waiting!!!! I was at one hospital o yesterday for Herceptrin and another 15 miles away for rads!! I was asleep in the car coming back!
Love and best wishes to each and every one of you and have a great time in the run up to Christmas. I love this time! Will be a lot quieter this year, and have had to miss a lot of lunches/booze up because of rads (boo hoo) but will enjoy myself nonetheless.
Take care all you women warriors!!
Nettie xxx
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Cathi, We did the 'santa' thing at christmas when I was growing up and again for my son. I don't know if I told this story before but we had a Santa in the local dept store who walked around the store wearing real sleigh bells across his chest, we would listen for the bells when we went to the store. He told the Christmas story and at times during the story he would jump slightly and make the bells jingle (suddenly the angels appeared). After we found him he would ask us if we listened to our parents and teachers and if we were good and if we helped others, my mom would ask him how Mrs Claus and the elves were doing and we would get miniature candy canes out of his red bag. When I was in the third grade we moved to another town about 15 miles away and I thought that MY SANTA wouldn't find me. That Christmas we went into the local 5 & 10 store and there was MY SANTA telling the Christmas story as always. Boy was I happy! We were raised to believe that Santa is the spirit of giving of ourselves to help others. Later years I found out that MY SANTA actually lived in the farm next to my grandparents and Mom really did know Mrs Claus and the elves
. One thing I regret is we never did get any photos of us with MY SANTA. Sheila
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Great story Shelia, I know I had pictures taken with Santa, but where they got to I just don't know, never did find any when my mom passed away and I did her house. We have a great one of Ed when he was about 3 hanging on the wall, such wonder in his eyes, Alexcis still finds it hard to believe thats PA-PA as a little boy -
Ah Nettie, I pray things get better and better for each day. Your a smart lady reading between the lines, as I suppose several of you have. All I can say is to utter some words right now is just not possible for me, perhaps selfish in a way to not be totally honest with my family and friends, but I know the moment I speak, things will change, it has taken 3 years + for the "how are you doing " questions and the looks/worries of people around me to stop for the most part, I am a year post MX and finally it seems as though NORMAL has returned, even with you all, it is so hard, I don't want to see worry and fear in the eyes of those I care about, because of BC.org I am able to keep my self in check and realize that my life is not crashing down and ready to end in the next few weeks , but right now I don't have the ability or strength to hold others up. I don't know if this makes sence or not. The right day, moment and time will come and I will confess my sins. Right now with so much happening in my family Ella, Amanda, even Jaclyn has her 3/mo follow up next week for her cervical issues, I need/want my focus on them, I love Ed so very much, but I know his protective side, he trys already to limit my holding, and lifting and playing with the kids because he knows how much I hurt afterwards. Once Ella is here, sqafe and healthy, I will begin Zometa, I guess thats Onco's plan, he has been throwing a few options at me, we shall see.
I LOVE YOU ALL. THANK YOU FOR UNDERSTANDING.
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You're right, Cathi. I'm sure several, if not all of us, have been reading between the lines. I know you'll spill details when you're ready. Let's get Ella here all safe, sound, and HEALTHY first. We understand how overwhelming all this must be for you. ((((((((Cathi))))))))
We LOVE you!!!
Hugs,
Karen
PS You want ME not to worry? I'm a born worrier! All I can promise is that I'll try to keep it in check!
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Cathi, you have to understand, we are all survivors and we read between the lines very well. But I agree that when you are good and ready we will be here for you.
Sheila
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Cathi, we're already here for you when you're ready to let go.....leap and the net will appear.
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XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO
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Yes, Cathi, your between-the-lines has been very clear. Feeling the lack of strength or ability to hold others up is a place we have all been. Some of us re-visit it frequently. It's your turn to sit back and accept support from others. That's how it works around here. It really isn't necessary to protect us, though. I for one am not afraid. You will do what you must in your own time. You had the strength to hear strong opinions and still trust your own heart. The Yellow Brick Road has many twists and turns and sometimes takes us in surprising directions. We walk with you no matter what.
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Cathi,
I echo the sentiments of the ladies that have already spoken. Your extended family will be here for you when you need us.
I wanted to know if I could get all your addresses. I would like to send Christmas cards out. Please PM me your address if you would like to be included.
HUGS to you all
mouse
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Awww Cathi, you know we're always here. Do what you have to do to get through the next few weeks, then you can come here and let it all out.
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(((Cathi)))
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Cathi,
What a loving soul you are to care so much about your family and friends... I'm thinking of you and sending warm wishes and healing white light your way.
Sue,
Hope you are healing up and feeling better too...
I'm thinking of you all and wishing you all a peaceful, happy holiday season.
Hugs!
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just know that we are here to hold you up, give strength, love and friendship ... no questions asked, but always concerned.
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Right back at you Meg!
edited to add an angel for those who need her
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