Help. So scared!

Merry-- this is the worst part that you are going through-- BELIEVE me, once you see your oncologist and get a treatment plan you will feel stronger. Chemo is awful BUT totally doable and the chances are extremely good that it will kick your cancer's butt. There are many of us on this board who had lots of lymph involvement and are doing just fine now. There is plenty of hope!

Christine 

Merry,

Wow, you have been through so much the last couple of years!  I know this just feels like too much, because we all have been there.  But many women do get cured of Stage III breast cancer-why can't you be one of them?  Surround yourself with good friends, build up your support team, and work with your oncologist on your treatment plan.  You can get through this.  Try not to read too much on these boards and don't look at the statistics.  Whatever gives you joy and inspiration-try to spend a little time on that too.  We are here for you!

Hugs

Bobbie

Merry - just want to add my welcome too. This really is the hardest part right now. I know how shocking it all seems. And the prospect of chemo is overwhelming. Try not to think too far ahead of yourself, just take it day by day. It seems that at the beginning there is so much ahead of you. I was right where you are this time last year, but, I got through it, and so will you!

It will get better. There are so many Stage 3 women doing so well, many, many years out from Diagnosis. I have great hope for all of us - this is absolutely NOT a death sentence.

Hang in there!

Merry - Sorry you are going through this, but I echo what was said above you will find a lot of support here. Take it one day at a time and remember this is all doable.

Hi Merry.

I am so glad you found us. There is a wealth of accurate and up to date information , plus lots of stage III ladies doing great here

I was were you are over four yrs ago.  I had  a very aggresive tumor, 12 positive nodes, no clear surgical margins, vascular involvment, blah, blah blah. It rocked me to the very core. Facing a mastectomy, moving to Florida for chemo , surgeries, rads, ( and having to leave behind my " life and husband) I was beyond a basket case. You will get through this. it is a hard journey, but doable. Take one day at a time, do not search the web( lots of mis information and old irrelevant stats) Surround yourself ONLY  with positive people. Take good care of yourself.  Come here often for support. We've all been there. If you feel anxious, get on some Xanax. If you have trouble sleeping, getsome Rx for that too. You need sleep ,rest, and lots of TLC.

You will also feel better once you have a tx plan and get started.

I am back home , healthy, " reconstructed" ,have hair,  started my own company, and look forward to spending lots and lots of happy  days with my family and friends and baby grand daughter . My dark days are now a memory.

You will get there too.

God Bless,

Dear Merry, I have read so many postings and talked to different people, they are so many survivors living beautiful life.  There is no reason that you won't be in the same group, search knowledge to be your power and God will guild you on the right path, he will give you the strength and peace.  Hugs, karen

Hi Merry,  I just am adding my voice to the many encouraging voices here.  You are among people who have been there and understand.  That feeling you mentioned, about it seeming like a bad dream, kind of unreal, is very common.  Hold on to hope.  It's not false hope, either.  Listen to the wonderful women, here, they know! 

Just celebrating my sixth anniversary this month! Multifocal cancer, 5 out of 13 nodes with extra capsular extension and perineural invasion. I feel FABULOUS! My onc told me "we are going for a cure--you are fit and strong." I was 65 and there were times during treatment when I felt I might not be as strong and fit as he thought I was. I made it through TAC--6 treatments 3 weeks apart, 30 rads and 5 years of Arimidex. The first 6 months were horrible, the next 3 were O.K., the last 5 years have been the best of my life. Hunker down, do whatever it takes and enjoy the rest of your life which will probably be a long one.

I have this forum under my favorites.  I don't visit the other sites very often because I have learned to really protect myself from what I read.  Don't wallow in statistics...they just don't matter because you are not a statistic.  I think the women that post here are an amazing group and please feel free to post all your feelings and fears.  I'm willing to bet you will be hard pressed to have a unique experience because we have all been through the same fears.

One thing I heard and that makes a lot of sense...we stage IIIer's get the kitchen sink thrown at us.  My oncology nurse actually said that once the cancer has been surgically removed and we have been found cancer free we are all in the same boat regardless of stage. 

Statistics stink so don't let your node count matter as much as the fact that they have been removed along with the cancer!

Merry

Welcome to the club that nobody wants to join!  It is tough, very tough in the beginning.  Getting your d/x, surgery, chemo, rads, etc.  It is tough, feels like a bomb was thrown at you.

You are at the hardest part of this whole thing right now.  Waiting is the worst when it comes to finding out your treatment plan.  Once you pathology comes back with your hormone status, you will feel better.  When your onc gives you the date as to when you are starting chemo, you will then find yourself in the fighting mode.

I was d/x this past January.  Like you, I have lots of nodes positive - 14.  I was scared out of my mind when my doctor gave me the news.  It's scary - no doubt about it.  I came to these boards for support and for answers but I got more than that.  I got to meet women from all over the world who I consider my friends.  Your "sistahs" will be here for you when you needs us.  Don't be afraid to ask any questions or to vent. 

You will get throught this Merry.  One foot in front of the other.  It is a hard road to go down on, but in the end, it is worth it.

Hang tight!

(((HUGS)))

Merry, I see you have "met" many of us stage 3'ers in the past couple of days. Many of us are further along on the long scary journey you have just started. and we can offer you some real hope. My own diagnosis was over seven years ago, and I bet your pathology will turn out to be very similar to mine. Stick with us, we are a knowledgeable, hopeful bunch of women. You might find your oncologist is not very optimistic--many of us have found that to be the case--but we are, and we are living proof it pays to be optimistic. As Kerry Mac once wrote, "Yep, nobody ever dropped dead from breast cancer."

Looking forward to seeing your journey evolve and seeing you in a far better place than you are right now. (I remember those times well...)

Merry ~ I'm going to "bump" (move to the top of the first page) a thread called "Success Stories". When I have those downer days I always read this. We all need reminders that many have survived and thrived for years and SO CAN WE!

Wishing you the very best.

Nico

Merry - don't feel you need to "be positive" either. I hated people telling me that when i was first diagnosed - you just can't be yet. But, keep moving forward, and the hope will come.

Merry - Sometimes being positive is the last thing you want or want to hear from someone, it's okay to be angry, confused, upset and sad.  It's easier for other people if they see us being positive - but you need to work through these emotions.  As you may have seen from reading different post there are days that some of the women, myself included are feeling on top of the world and days when it's hard to see past the gloom, but getting support from these boards, church or a support group with people who understand will help.

You CAN do this - you will be walking along the beach next year thinking this wasn't as hard as you thought......................