Chemo Starting Sep 09

Vickilynn, thank you for welcoming meI. I am definitely with you at the cabin! Today is one of those days that I ask myself, "Why am I doing this?" But I know one of these days, we will all look back at this period in time and it will be a distant memory and we will be healthy and thriving.

Let me know how you do with Taxol on Tuesday. I am praying that all goes well with you. Take care, everyone.

Holly

Hey Vicki and Sisters....

Yea...I 'm sick of cancer...sick of being sick....sick of talking about it....sick of water....sick of heartburn....sick, sick sick....geez.... I just am tired of it too..... Cabin sounds nice....a nice hike through the trees to a beautiful creek..... lot's of energy....run down a grassy hill.....eat Mexican food....really spicy and sushi.....have a really hopsy cold beer or a glass of really tasty red wine.... get back to the cabin....and ponder our finds of our little jaunt....like cool insects...waterfalls, pretty wild mushrooms and fungus....birds and animals... have a good girl talk time...then just kick back and fall asleep and sleep all nite long til 10 in the morning...get up have tea and cookies and chat some more.....and just live.....feeling great.....feeling safe.....looking forward to tomorrow.....

I want that life back! I feel a good cry coming.....

Melinda  

Hello SOSisters... I"m so sorry that everyone is feeling down today, however, if you don't mind I will certainly be happy to join you!  #3 is kicking butt, I am trying so hard to be positive and upbeat but my body is so tired.  So I'm with you all, sick and tired of being sick & tired!  I did get another response from a possible donor - it was a no but that's okay, at least they are responding and someone is going to say YES.

Mari - loved your blog.  We raise money each year where I work for Alex's Lemonade Stand and St. Jude's, and we raised $1100.00 which we presented this past Friday the Breast Cancer Center. You enjoy your week with hubby - hope you are feeling good!

Vickilynn - I so want to join you and all the rest of our sisters somewhere.  I'm working on it.  I don't really care as long as we can relax, eat, have a good time and get away from BC!  Just think when we do get to meet we will have energy, taste buds and maybe some hair!

Susan - snow melting yet?  I was doing Weight Watchers too and hope to get back to it soon.  Of course, on the bad chemo week I don't need WW - already lost 5 lbs since last Thursday!

Catherine - so glad #3 went better for you!  How are you doing?  

BarbAnne41 - welcome to the Bald & Beautiful.  Good for you, how does it feel?  Sorry #3 is getting you, me too....  Just hang in there, we will get better!

Barbt0323- what wonderful news that your tumor is shrinking!  Hope you are feeling better today!

DomeGal- glad you joined us.  We do share and we do help each other.  Hope the mouse is gone and you are feeling good.

Holly - welcome!  Good luck on your txt on Thursday, there are several of us who sit in the chair on Thursdays and send positive vibes to each other.  They help ALOT!

Melinda - I could have written your post.  Seems to be a trend here with all of us.  We will get through this and be so much stronger than we were before.  Hang in there - we all can relate!  I did have a cry this am, sometimes it helps just as much as anything else!

Neece - I sure hope you have gotten some sleep!  Glad you had a good time with your parents.  So now we all want to come to the beach, somehow I don't think I will find a sponsor for that!  Maybe for those of us who keep having stubble we will grow our new hair in quicker (I'm going for positive here).

To everyone who hasn't had a chance to post, we are thinking of you and hoping you are having good days and no side effects.  Missing you though so post when you can.  Thoughts and prayers are with you!

Jane

Neece,

My onc prescribed Restoril for the insomnia related to the steriods. It works for me.    I hope you find what works for you soon.

Amy

I'm so upset....just typed a bunch & lost it!  It makes me crazy when that happens!  Anyways.....

I need to let you all know that I have stolen your sleep gene!  Seriously, since day 1 there has not been a time that I haven't been able to just zonk out, with the exception of the 3 days that I'm on Decadron with each tx, and I somewhat welcome those evenings because it's the only time I get anything done!  I have had a hard time dealing with not being productive, but I guess I need to get over that and enjoy being able to sleep....wish I could share with you!

It's a beautiful & chilly morning in Seattle but oooohhhhh, what I would do for summer in Syndney...in January! NEECE: It sounds like it'll be a marvelous vacation & a good time with the family!  We also are being very vigilant about germs at our house (and everywhere else!).  I think I've become somewhat of a germaphobe...using tissues to open doors, etc.  And NEECE, you said you had a mx in 2002...did I miss that you've gone through this before?  Oh...I do hope that your fill up was very tolerable...I can understand your being anxious..it seems so much is  unpredictable while going through this...I just hope it went well!

MARI: So happy you get whole-family time in Barcelona. I'd be glad to join you and babysit-maybe be the nanny!!!...really can't imagine how you are doing this on your own...you are amazing! 

MARILOU:  Is your blood ok??  Don't know if I missed a current update but I can't go back and lose my post again so, thinking of you & wishing you oodles of happy white blood cells!

BARBANNE: A beautiful SOS!!!! Yeah YOU!  My hair, like others', is growing!!  It looks like the little strands are headed to the right...which is the way I part my hair so they have good little memories!

BARBT:  Hooray...a shrinking mass....wonderful!!!  Good to know this poison is doing exactly what it's supposed to do!!

VICKILYNN: CONGRATS ON BUYING SMALLER PANTS!!!!  That's awesome!  Seriously, I think the tastebud ordeal is almost worse than being bald!  We went to the Wurst and Kraut feed in our hometown last weekend and I ate everything....all homemade yummies. The most delicious thing was the sauerkraut...couldn't really taste the sausage, noodles, desserts, but ate them anyway..which only caused a bit of heartburn!  I have finally decided, in hopes of smaller pants, not to eat what doesn't taste good!  You've inspired me!

MELINDA:  Thanks for the awesome trip...it was amazing...I want to go to the land of happy again!!  I'll keep reading that.  AND, I forgot to tell you that the blog is BEAUTIFUL...I, as well, cried OUT LOUD!!!  DH was sitting by me while the music played and he had no idea what it was until he peaked over and saw it was "our blog!"  Tears just ran down my face.  It was from the very beginning....and that seems so long ago.  What we have shared, some people don't share in a lifetime.  Thank you so much.

DOMEGAL:  Please give your son a very tight hug and kiss from me...and tell him that I will be forever thankful that he represented our country in a very difficult time and place in history. I'm hoping he will be able to stay home...but if not, God be with him always.  Lots of prayers for all of you hoping the taxol train...you, Vickilynn, Holly????

JANE:  I think you're right!  One day we're all going to jump for joy because someone will be touched by our story!   That will be a day to celebrate...along with all of the other celebrations we'll be having...healthy lives at the top of the list!  You are having 6 tx...I have 4...so strange how many different protocols, isn't it!  I'm going out on a limb and saying the next ones will be the easiest!!!

OK MOUSKETEERS:  Our family always kept a few hungry cats around....tis the season for those pesky little mammals (are they mammals?) to find cozy places to hang out

CATHERINE: Hope you're feeling good!  My #3 was my easiest treatment & so looking forward to Friday...and the last hooray!!!

HOLLY:  Worried about your fever....it's been a few days since I saw your post so I do hope you're feeling chipper and they figured out what was wrong!

FLACRACKER:  I'm with you....# 3 brought the tireds and worsening pesky tastebuds!  Going to go for cranberry juice now because I'm so tired of every other kind of juice...gatorade, vitamin water, even my beloved ginger ale!  How many more txs do you have?

OK...it's countdown to kickoff for me.  Friday will be my last day of treatment.  Aside from herceptin every third week until 9/10 (sorry, I know I've said this thousands of times), my kick-butt treatments are done.  I am compiling a list (thanks to advice by my SOS) for my onc, so I can ask about the BRCA test, PET scans, Mammos...etc., all the stuff I need and want to do so that I can live my life without a cloud hanging over me.  Every time I read an obit...and I read them alot (peoples' lives are so amazing!), and I see that someone passed from cancer, I freak out.  I've never been a glass half empty type of person and it scares me that I'm scared. 

LOVE TO ALL OF YOU!!!!

I started with weekly Taxol and Herceptin and have never been nauseated. They give me Aloxi IVP before my treatment along with Benedryl, Zantac, and Decadron but thats it. My onc asked me before I started my treatments if I ever had morning sickness with pregnancy, etc. I said "no." She said I shouldn't have any problem then. She was right.

Maybe you will not have any

Thanks to all for welcoming me: Barbara, Neece, Susan, Jane, RonnieKay.  Sorry if I missed anyone. My memory isn't as good as it used to be. Today I went into the office for the first time in a week. I was going stir crazy staying at home due to my fever. I kept my office door closed and told people to stay away if they were even remotely feeling sick. I disinfected everything in my office and used hand sanitizer like crazy. 

Talked with the doc. yesterday since I was still having a low-grade fever and she called in a prescription for antibiotics as a precautionary measure. Since my blood counts are within normal range and all the tests they ran was negative, they are not sure why I continue to have a low-grade fever. Since I have been on the antibiotics for a couple of days, the highest my temperature has been is around 99.4 so I am hoping I will say bye-bye to the fever. Yea.

I start on Taxol (DD 4) Thursday and I am nervous. I have heard about neuropathy being one of the SEs and that scares me. Can anyone shed some light on this? Also, is anyone taking Ambien for sleep issue? My friend swears by it, but wanted to hear if anyone had any strange SEs with it.

Sending out best wishes to everyone and positive vibes for those who will be sitting in the chair with me on Thursday.

Holly

Dear Holly,

I also get fever all the time. It goes up around 6th day and goes down to normal around 11th day. My oncologist says it is because of Neulasta. She told me unless the fever goes over 100.4 or does not subside with tylenol I should not worry. Your mileage may vary and of course you and your doc know best what's right for you.

I'd recommend you don't take Ambien on your own. Ask your onco first. They may prescribe something else that might be better during chemo.

Regarding neuropathy, yes Taxanes can cause it in approx 20% patients. At first signs, tell your doctor. Depending upon the severity they may adjust the dose. In a few cases, neuropathy takes years to go away and in some rare cases, it never goes away so please be vigilant about it. I have heard Glutamine is good for preventing it.

Love,

Dear Holly,



I also get fever all the time. It goes up around 6th day and goes down to normal around 11th day. My oncologist says it is because of Neulasta. She told me unless the fever goes over 100.4 or does not subside with tylenol I should not worry. Your mileage may vary and of course you and your doc know best what's right for you.



I'd recommend you don't take Ambien on your own. Ask your onco first. They may prescribe something else that might be better during chemo.



Love,

Re:  Taxol ?'s, Like Amy, I've had no nausea, gettng Aloxi, Benedryl, and Tagamet iv w/tx. - And although many say that the side effects are cumulative, I only have 4 more treatments (out of 12) and I think I feel better now that the first couple weeks I got it....I do have se under control though.

As far as sleep, I fought that for many weeks, don't really like to take meds - I take advil pm (just one) every night now along with my prilosec -- I so wish I'd started the Prilosec right away on the AC.  I also take a lasix one to two days a week, sometimes 3 - I think the herceptin is causing the bloat, water retention, swelling, etc.  Anyway, I'm careful with the diuretic, but I feel so much more normal with my side effects managed -  

Hope that helps!  

Hugs

Di Di 

Hiya Ladies!

Tastebuds.....  I am officially out of treatment for 5 weeks, and things taste amazing!  This is after ALL the skin and tastebuds sloughed off my tongue one week after TX #2.  My tongue feels young....lmao, I can't explain it, but it feels softer and smoother and it's bright pink!  I'm calling it my 2009 model.

You all have been on my mind alot.  Get off, my neck is getting tired.

Seriously, I wish we all had just Tigger days.  But think of what you'd miss!  Eeyore days can be rough, but you can grow from them.  I don't cry often....it makes my big ears red and my nose look like I have a drinking problem.....but when I do, I reflect.  I remember how things were, how they are now, and how they will be.  No, none of us will ever be what we were before, but that doesn't have to be a bad thing!  For example......before our son was killed, I was a good mom.  When he died, I thought I would die.  I wanted to die.....but slowly I made my way through the grief, and reflected.  I thought how I hadn't been a good mom, how I'd scolded him, or how we didn't get him braces when he wanted.  After a year or so, I realized while in the middle of a good cry, that I was a terrific mom and I reflected about how great of a son he was.  I came to the realization that even though I would never ever be the same, I would go on......and eventually, I would be better, simply because his death taught me not to put things off anymore, and to enjoy each day to the fullest.  I do that now.

If you havent had anything like this go on in your life before now, you will realize just exactly what it has taught you once it's over.  It isn't all going to be bad!  You will come out on the other side of this better.  Don't ever forget that, and don't ever lose the memory of now, the hope for tomorrow, or the desire for the future!

LOVE YOU ALL!!!!

Dear Vicki,

Oh dear, I'm watching you closely .....

Hope you feel better real soon.

Hi Sisters

I'm back!! I will say it just the same as many of you have said it # 3 kick my BUTT. I was totally down for 3 days. I couldn't get off the couch. My bowels didn't stop running and now they won't start. I don't know if I'm coming or going. I read all the post but my mind just isn't retaining any of it.  Back at work today for a few hours than back to the couch. Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day. Thinking of all of you but can't do the indiviual thing

THINK POSITIVE

chat with you soon

Catherine

Hello all of you dear, dear ladies,

Pamela, you are so right!  Thank you for the perspective. 

I must admit that tx#3 has KICKED MY BUTT!!!!  I am not pulling off the energizer bunny thing at all.  And my husband invited his sister over for dinner, and he isn't even going to be there.  Oh my gosh!  I will be better on the other side.  I know that this is true, and I know that I will be good again.  But, today I miss my hair!  I miss that in my old life I got compliments on my hair almost every day, and I just miss my hair.  I know it will grow back, and I will be good again, it is just today I miss it.

You are the only people in my life that get this right now, and I thank you for being there, and being my sanity.  I am at work right now, and I am not going to stick it out much longer.  I need a nap, especially if I have to cook dinner for my sister-in-law.  I love her, but seriously...

 Love you all so much,

Susan