Question about my Grandmother - she's 96.

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Hermione
Hermione Member Posts: 2
edited June 2014 in Caring for Someone with Breast cancer

Hi,

 My grandmother is 96 - will be 97 in December. She takes no medicine for anything and can walk well (for someone her age), wash the dishes, run the sweeper, and play the piano.  Her biggest downfall is that she doesn't drive a car anymore!  Oh her cholesterol is a bit elevated but nothing major.

 A recent mamagram showed something fishy so they checked it out. It is a small stage one breat tumor. This was told to them on July, 16 - yesterday. My mother told me that my grandmother is scheduled to go to the HOSPITAL to have a lumpectomy. 

 Here are my concerns and questions:

If I were 96, I would not want to have a mamagram. At that age, why would I want to know if anything was amiss. I would try to enjoy myself as much as I could. I'm really upset that my mother even took my grandmother for a mamagram. I think it was a really stupid move.  it's like why LOOK for something wrong at age 96?

Is it worth it to put my grandmother through a sugerical operation? I'm worried about all of the bacteria and so forth that are running rampant in hospitals such as Staph, Psuedonomas, etc..When my Grandfather had to be rushed to the hospital at age 84, he got a staph infection and he died. 

2. Can  96 year old take being put under anthesesia?

3. Also, do you think the pain involved after sugery is something that a 96 year old should have to go through?

IF my grandmother goes to that hospital and gets an infection that screws her up or kills her I will GO BALISTIC!!!!!

 I'm thinking she's not 25 so keep her out of the hospital. But my perspective is a bit uniformed which is why I am asking about this.

Please offer any thoughts.

Thank you so much for answering,

Hermione
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Comments

  • roseg
    roseg Member Posts: 3,133
    edited July 2009

    I agree that a mammogram on a 96 y/o seems like a waste of time.

    The problem is that now you know something is there.

    If she wants to have something done and can pass the pre-op testing I suppose she could have surgery and stop right there.

    But I'd also consider not doing anything. People that age can be sidelined by small things so why take a risk? It's probably small and not so aggressive.

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  • Alaina
    Alaina Member Posts: 461
    edited July 2009

    I think ultimately the decision to get a mammo should have been left up to your grandmother.  It seems she has all her mental faculties and is still semi-active and in pretty good health.  When was her last mammo?  Is she the type to be vigilant about her health, getting regular tests and visiting the doctor annually, etc?  If so, then maybe a mammo at her age is not so unusual.

    I do think your fear/distrust of hospitals given your grandfather's unfortunate circumstance may be feeding your reaction to this.  You have a natural and understandable fear.  But this does not mean your grandmother will have a negative experience or result. 

    If it is an early stage cancer (but let's hope it's benign!), by finding it and removing it, maybe a few more years will be added to her natural life-span.  More importantly, even if it doesn't expand her life greatly, it may save her from a death that could be painful and incredibly uncomfortable for her.  I know you didn't mean it this way, but using advanced age as a reason NOT to get tested for certain diseases seems a little fatalistic and uncaring.  "She's old, let her die of whatever's going to kill her..."  *shrug*

    It seems your grandmother has a nice quality of life right now.  Please allow her to make decisions for herself as much as is practicle, and inform your mother of your fears.  But don't let those fears override doing what is medically right and appropriate.  Grandma may have many more years left in her life.  They deserve to be cancer-free!

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  • idaho
    idaho Member Posts: 1,187
    edited July 2009

    I agree with the hospital observation - why ask for an infection?  If she does go ahead with surgery (and it is questionable if she can withstand the anesthesia)- I just want to tell you that a lumpectomy is not a painful surgery.... If it were me that is all I would do if even that......Tami

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