Take it lite, sisters!

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Anonymous
Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
edited June 2014 in Life After Breast Cancer

Well, it's time for me to saddle up and prepare to ride off into the sunset, my friends! The negativity on the boards has gotten too out of hand as of late (hard to believe it is really a support board at times), since I have enough drama in my REAL life and don't need it in my virtual one, LOL...

I just wanted to thank all the wonderful folks like Denny, BethyNY, JDash, Pepper, Amy (both Pink Ribbon and Amy G.), TammyLou Jorf, KBeth, Fitchick.Ladurby and a whole host of others who patiently answered every question I had - no matter how ridiculous. You  are absolutely awesome! And thanks to women like Journey, and so many others onthe reconstruction thread who listen to my answers - even when they didn't ask me anything..

I also thank Traci for starting the "Bitch" thread and giving a gal a place to go and vent. Thanks for the laughs!

I truly hope the moderators will somehow be able to regain control of some of the uglier sides of the board - I really do. Nobody newly diagnosed should have to find the name-calling and personal attacks that have been flying like mad lately. 

I'll leave you with this "recipie" a friend sent me a few days ago. For my agnostic and atheist sisters, just substitute the words that may be problematic:

1. Take a 10-30 minute walk every day. And while you walk, smile. It is the ultimate anti-depressant.

  2. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day. Talk to God about what is going on in your life. Buy a lock if you have to.

  3. When you wake up in the morning complete the following statement, 'My purpose is to __________ today. I am thankful for ______________'.

4. Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.

  5. Drink green tea and plenty of water. Eat blueberries, wild Alaskan salmon, broccoli, almonds & walnuts.

  6. Try to make at least three people smile each day.

  7. Don't waste your precious energy on gossip, energy vampires, issues of the past, negative thoughts or things you cannot c ontrol. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.

  8. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a College kid with a maxed out charge card.

  9. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.

10. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.

11. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

12. You are not so important that you have to win every argument. agree to disagree.

13. Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present.

14. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

15. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.

16. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: 'In five years, will this matter?'

17. Forgive everyone for everything.

18. What other people think of you is none of your business.

19. GOD heals everything - but you have to ask Him.

20. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.

21. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch!!!

22. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.

23. Each night before you go to bed complete the following statements: I am thankful for __________. Today I accomplished _________.

24. Remember that you are too blessed to be stressed.

25. When you are feeling down, start listing your many blessings. you'll be smiling be fore you know it.

Be well,

Felicia 

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Comments

  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited January 2009

    Felicia

    Im sorry to see you go but totally understand why you are making that choice...

    There has been lots and lots of snipping going on in some of the threads here....

    Im not new here anymore but let me tell you if I had seen those threads when I first came here I would never have stayed...

    I find it very sad that some cant ignore a comment and let the board, threads and ladies/men here use this for what it is suppose to be....

    Again, Im sorry to see you go as I have always enjoyed your words.

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  • cmb35
    cmb35 Member Posts: 1,106
    edited January 2009

    Whoops! Just saw this one... I get it, I really do.

    Sorry to see you go, hope to see you around again, and take good care of yourself.

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  • nosurrender
    nosurrender Member Posts: 2,019
    edited January 2009

    Dear Felicia,

    I don't know what is going on, but I am really going to miss you. 

    Please keep in touch with me. You have my email. I will PM it to you again.

    I just read you can't come on Sunday - I AM SO BUMMED! I was so excited to meet you finally!!!

    God bless you, girl. I am not going to say good bye- just see ya later.....

    Love,

    g

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  • dreamwriter
    dreamwriter Member Posts: 3,255
    edited January 2009

    Felicia - I loved your avitar right from the start.  I instinctively thought of you as cute, perky, smart and ready to kick a$$.  I am sorry to see you go.  I must be slow because I never actually saw something until just now.  All I saw was deleted posts.   I hate losing a friend (even if you never said you wanted to be my friend).  I just hoped that it was automatic.  I am standing in the middle of this with my mouth hanging open and tears dripping down.  Hope to hear from you - dreamwriter@sympatico.ca and hey, thanks for putting up with my whining

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  • Member_of_the_Club
    Member_of_the_Club Member Posts: 3,646
    edited January 2009

    Wow, I had no idea this was even going on.  My rule of thumb is that I avoid the off topic threads and as a result I have avoided all of the negativity.  When I've broken this rule, I;ve regretted it.  Reconsider, Felicia, you really are loved here.  

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  • Isabella4
    Isabella4 Member Posts: 2,166
    edited January 2009

    Felicia.... you will be greatly missed for your forthright way, your eloquent words, and just all the laughs you have given us.

    I know you're having a bit of trouble at home at the moment...is that putting it mildly??!!..and was hoping to keep up with how you deal with it..just look after yourself girl...it has been nice to have known you thru these boards. I gotta agree with you , its becoming a very dreary place to be now, once you could actually GET support, and give it back, now it all seems to have gone clique-y and nasty. Whatever the newbies must think I do not know. We were once a very caring group of like minded girls, all in the same boat....how things have changed.

    Reconsider ?????? please ?????

    Isabella.

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  • badboob67
    badboob67 Member Posts: 2,780
    edited January 2009

    Felicia,

    I'm going to miss you! I completely understand how you feel. There has been so much negativity here lately. The mods' "response" to the concerns is ridiculous...either they are just not "getting" it or they have their own agenda.  BLAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

    I love ya, girl....will ya visit sometimes?

    (((((HUGS)))
    Diane

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  • Estepp
    Estepp Member Posts: 6,416
    edited January 2009

    Oh, this is sad. I have been one of those readers that liked your answers...:(

    I have not been on any threads that have been yukky...:(

    What a bummer... to loose someone with the "time in" to teach others...

    I am sorry to see you leave.  I have only been here a short time, but you have helped me just by my reading... Thank you.

    Laura

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  • yellowrose
    yellowrose Member Posts: 886
    edited January 2009

    Sad to see you go.  I haven't "spoken" to you much but have always enjoyed reading your posts.  Take care.

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  • Traci-----TripNeg
    Traci-----TripNeg Member Posts: 2,298
    edited January 2009

    This sucks.

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  • lexi4
    lexi4 Member Posts: 1,074
    edited January 2009

    Ah Felicia, please don't stay away long. Your wisdom and guidance is truly needed here and appreciated by many. Take care of you first, then maybe reconsider coming back. Until then, be well sweet girl.

    Hugs and Prayers,

    Lexi

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  • mzmiller99
    mzmiller99 Member Posts: 894
    edited January 2009

    Yeah, crap.  I enjoyed your posts and 'tude.  I've only been here since last fall, so I feel like a newbie and don't know some of the history behind the negative posts, but we need your input on this crappy disease,  I hope you reconsider.  If you don't, know that I am copying your list and will try very hard to make it me. So, you wii make a lasting impression on many people in my life, along with all of your bc.org family.

    Susan

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  • Belinda44
    Belinda44 Member Posts: 718
    edited March 2011

    Delete

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  • bluedahlia
    bluedahlia Member Posts: 6,944
    edited January 2009

    I totally understand.  I post less and less.  The problems on this forum will never be addressed.  Good luck Felicia.  You're one of the good guys.

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  • sccruiser
    sccruiser Member Posts: 1,119
    edited January 2009

    I am with you Felicia.

    I too am going to stay away from here. As others have said, the negativity and cliqueness is intolerable. I'll try to find other ways to help my fellow bc sisters and LE sisters. We need each other. See you around and won't say goodbye to you!

    grace 

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  • Estepp
    Estepp Member Posts: 6,416
    edited January 2009

    What threads are you gals in that are so mean and negative? Why won't BCO people stop it?

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  • mke
    mke Member Posts: 584
    edited January 2009

    Well, Felicia - go out there and kick butt at whatever you do. (not that you need my encouragement)  Good rules, 5 and 6 particularly.  I think I can do those.

    Live long and prosper

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  • iodine
    iodine Member Posts: 4,289
    edited January 2009

    Blessings, we will all miss you.  Hope you ck in from time to time. 

    Perhaps those awful threads, which I don't read either, will finally get worn out and leave.

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited January 2009

    Good luck felicia.....

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  • AnnNYC
    AnnNYC Member Posts: 4,484
    edited January 2009

    Felicia!!!  You can't make it to the party???

    I'm sorry I've been so absent from the boards -- I feel like I owe a lot of apologies -- "drama in real life" kind of describes it -- working all the time, totally broke (so much so I couldn't even mail a Xmas package to a sister here...)

    -- anyway, sorry to hijack with my own story --

    If I head up the Hudson, which I do sometimes, I will give you a call.

    Hugs, much love, you're the BEST!!!

    Ann

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  • jader
    jader Member Posts: 223
    edited January 2009

    best wishes

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited January 2009

    Felicia:  I am beyond upset that you won't be coming around anymore.  You have been an inspiration and strength to many here.  You will be missed by many.  I'm so glad we were able to meet and will always treasure your friendship.

    Someone mentioned your avatar and I have to tell you I love it too.  Says it all girlfriend.

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  • ladurbi
    ladurbi Member Posts: 40
    edited January 2009

    God bless Felicia.  I wish you the very best...

    Larry

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  • abbadoodles
    abbadoodles Member Posts: 2,618
    edited January 2009

    Well, isn't that a pip?  I am not up on the negative stuff as I don't visit many threads anymore, just a couple.  I'm sorry to hear things are in that state.

    Good luck, Felicia.  I wish you the best for your continuing health and happiness. 

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  • ADK
    ADK Member Posts: 2,259
    edited January 2009

    Awwwww, Felicia,

     I get it, but you know how needed you are here?  I so appreciate you and your attitude and you have been so helpful to newbies.  I said a couple of years ago that I wasn't going to come back and I certainly post less now, but I still check things out.  Please know you are loved Felicia!!!

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  • saint
    saint Member Posts: 1,877
    edited January 2009

    Hugs Felicia--I understand totally, but you not being here makes one less contributor for the support, laughter & love you so willingly share. We need all the good witches to keep the bad ones in check..........

    Until we see you again - Be well & stay strong

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  • BethNY
    BethNY Member Posts: 2,710
    edited January 2009

    Hey my felicity...

    Thanks for that post. Not about the part where you're leaving-- although, I've been spending less and less time here myself (unless it's in the makeup or fashion thread where everything is safe except poor fashion choices) but I truly believe the majority of sisters here have beautiful hearts and I'm proud to call a lot of them friends.

    Please join facebook!!! There are a ton of us veterans from BCO on there, and its a fun easy way to keep up with one another.

    I really need to re-read those simple rules you posted. I especially loved #11, 12 and 15.

    I love you. Always have Always will. So as long as we're in touch somewhere out there, then I'm okay with it.

    xoxo

    b

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  • KLynn
    KLynn Member Posts: 1,407
    edited January 2009

    Hey there Felicia,

    Not really sure about what is going on here, I guess I stay away from those posts.I hate to see you leave..There are so many wonderful ladies here, that love and care about you...I was really hoping to meet you at the party Sat..I hope to meet you in the future sometime..I am plannning on having one of the next get togethers in the summer (down the Jersey Shore) so I hope you will check in from time to time..I will make sure the ladies at the party know your email...You have truly been an inspiration here, and I have always enjoyed your posts..Stay healthy with your" kicking"  cancer butt...Hugs xoxo KLynn

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  • PSK07
    PSK07 Member Posts: 781
    edited January 2009

    Be well, Felicia, be well. Best to you and your son and the H2B.

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  • Anonymous
    Anonymous Member Posts: 1,376
    edited January 2009
    Makes me sad.Frown 
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