I need a mentor

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  • EWB
    EWB Member Posts: 2,927
    edited November 2008

    my people, women I have never met and yet from whom I find enormous strength, faith and life ...I am overwhelmed and humbled at the thought. 

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  • moodyk13
    moodyk13 Member Posts: 1,180
    edited November 2008
    EWB  did you find a bible????  if so which one did you get??? 
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  • EWB
    EWB Member Posts: 2,927
    edited November 2008

    No- started out to do 2 errands- got half way thru the first and decided it was time to go home.  I am very tired last few days... I plan to go later today after my nap. Let you know what I find.

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  • saint
    saint Member Posts: 1,877
    edited November 2008

    I am so glad that ppl here feel confident enough in their faith/spirituality to share it.  Since we got deeply into Christianity lately I hope everyone who reads here knows that ALL are welcome!

    There are MANY kinds of spirituality-F&F & I discussed this at length instead of sleeping Tues nite!! LOL Other faiths are not bastardizations of the bible, but original, separate & respectable. I think study of other faiths is fascinating. MOST faiths are based on the same principles for living a good life pleasing to God & supporting community. I just want to say straight out that EVERYONE has something to offer that cam benefit someone else reading here! I, personally have been helped by surprising perspectives outside my own "culture"......So feel free to share from YOUR strength--Torah, Book of Mormon, teaching of Mohammed & all others--all are respected here & welcome!

    F&F! THAT is one of the best pix I have ever seen! It's cuz we were so happy!! Send me a copy! HUGS all---be well & stay strong! 

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  • PinkyLee
    PinkyLee Member Posts: 648
    edited November 2008

    Barbe

    I have had the expanders since september 23rd.  My first diag was 4 years ago, I had recurrence this year.

    I too have had a hysterectomy manyyears ago and maybe my issue is image at this point.  when I had the hysterectomy, I was happy until the hot flash and nightsweat which are even worst now, but in time I delt with it.  I was then 37.  When I was diagnosed in 2004, I dealt with the lumpectomy and radiation and the burned skin, but this time I am having trouble dealing with it and I am not ashamed to be having problems dealing with it. 

    I do now have hair on my lip that I must get waxed.  Many things have changed since I lost all my female organs and my image my be one of them.  In time I will deal with that too.

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  • Held
    Held Member Posts: 506
    edited November 2008

    PinkyLee,

    Close you eyes, take a deep breath and imagine my arms wrapped around you, hugging you as tight as you can stand, and as tight as you need.  I am so sorry for you pain. 

    I am glad you are not ashamed you are having problems dealing with all this crap. You have a right to every single one of your feelings.  I admire your courage. I have not had a hysterectomy, so I can not even being to understand how you must feeling having been thru all you have. I have had a bilat mastectomy and I know all too well those feelings of sadness and frustration.  The whole thing really sucks, doesn't it?

    I wish I had some wonderful words of wisdom for you, but I am not all that wise.  I can however let you know that I am thinking of you and praying for you. 

    How many expansions have you had?

    F&F/Saint - you ladies are BEAUTIFUL -  inside and out!  Thanks for sharing the photo.  I am glad you had a good time.

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  • moodyk13
    moodyk13 Member Posts: 1,180
    edited November 2008

    Hi everyone!  I wanted to let you know that I have started a new thread in this forum called "Bible Study for the Biblically Challenged Anyone?".  Thanks to Held and your desire for spiritual guidance, I have seen that there is a desire for people here to know the Bible and all the answers God's word has for us.

    Between this thread and the one I started (and hope will have interest) we can all have such a better understanding of what God is doing in our lives and where He wants us to go.  My prayer is that these two threads can work together.

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  • EWB
    EWB Member Posts: 2,927
    edited November 2008

     PinkyLee- my heart aches for you and with you.  Sounds like there has been lots going on over past few years.  I imagine it would be hard to keep taking things away and NOT struggle about it some days (or many days).  Please know you are in my prayers tonight.

     Well- got myself out and got to bookstore-  Had wanted to start with religous store but just wasn't going to happen today.  As I wondered- realized I have a bible that I like very much (was given to at my confirmation many yrs ago)..what I need is a guide to understanding.  Not only is there Bible for Dummies, there is The Idiots Gude to the Bible.  I now own both.  They appear to be very basic in understanding the basics of the bible, easy to read etc.  I'll let you know.

    Gentle hugs and kick ass prayers to all in need tonight...Elaine

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  • saint
    saint Member Posts: 1,877
    edited November 2008

    Thanx Elaine- I especially appreciate kick as prayers! LMAO HUGS

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  • faithandfifty
    faithandfifty Member Posts: 10,007
    edited November 2008
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  • EWB
    EWB Member Posts: 2,927
    edited November 2008

    how beautiful!

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  • PinkyLee
    PinkyLee Member Posts: 648
    edited November 2008

    Thank you all for being here and allowing me to vent when I need it.  I try very hard to keep my spirits up and keep the faith that I have always had, but somedays I find it hard. 

    This site has been a blessing since I joined.  If it weren't for the words and prayers of all of you I don't know how I would have made it during the worst of my days.  Cancer is a very difficult disease.  Once you have it, it feels like you are always on the lookout for it to come back and when it has come back once, I feel like I will always be on edge. 

    Sometimes I wish I had a spiritual confident near that I could pour my heart out to and voice all my fears and concerns, but I don't.  I am lucky to have all you women who don't judge, but listen; who understand because you have been there and understand the fears and stress that is associated with healing from surgery that is this major.

    Keep me in your prayers and I will do the same for you.  Today has been better and I hope to get to church this weekend.

    PinkyLee

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  • faithandfifty
    faithandfifty Member Posts: 10,007
    edited November 2008

    ((((((((((((((((((((((((((PinkyLee)))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

    xx00xx00xx00xx00xx00xx00xx00xx00xx00xx00xx

    Words are so inadequate -- especially when merely typed on a screen. Perhaps the image of all of us wrapping our arms around you will offer some encouragement. I'm so glad that you've had a bit of a better day. Will continue to pray for you specifically, since you've shared your concerns and everyone here who gathers for encouragement and support.

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  • saint
    saint Member Posts: 1,877
    edited November 2008

    BTW--just to clarify--I did very little at F&F's conferences. I think she gave me jobs to make me feel like I was needed! She IS a consummate professional who has been doing this VERY well without "people" long b4 I showed up!! Her energy is boundless-if we could only bottle it & give it to ppl in tx!!!

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  • Granny71
    Granny71 Member Posts: 58
    edited November 2008

    Good morning, "my people," Granny checking in the day after surgery (sentinal, dissection,  lumpectomy). The first thing I noticed on the thread this morning was that fantastic picture of Faith and Saint! It's nice to see some faces to match the tremendous hearts and warmth flowing through this thread. Pulse rate was a scary issue before surgery (103 bpm), but I remembered the exercise that was shared during some of our insomnia discussions. I started at 1,000, subtracting threes, planning to work my way down to 103 and start visualizing a lower rate ... the next thing I knew, a nurse was saying, the surgery is over, you are in the recovery room ... WOW!  I'm flying high, with praise to God, and gratitude to all my church people, including you ladies, who have supported me on this journey.  Have not had time to share in the recent discussions, but I agree that we are indeed a church family.  In my worship tradition, the Apostles Creed is introduced by the service leader with these words, "Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is the one true Church..." So, that definitely qualifies us as part of the Church -- without walls, not only structurally, but without walls of judgmentalism and some of the other stuff that sometimes makes religion hazardous to our spiritual health. Love and hugs, Granny.

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  • Held
    Held Member Posts: 506
    edited November 2008

    Granny - glad to hear you are doing well

    Pinkylee - You have been on my heart and mind.  I am glad you are doing a bit better. I thought about you all day yesterday.  I spent an hour or two last night looking for a specific bible verse that was rolling around in my head.  I finally broke down and called my father.  It seems I didn't remember it quite right, but I tried.  I think this is the one I was thinking of.  It is 2nd Kings 20:2

    "This is what the Lord, the God of your ancestor David, says: I have heard your prayer and seen your tears."

    I was thinking about how God knows  all of our hurts, all of our tears. My father also pointed me to Psalm 6:

    1 O LORD, do not rebuke me in your anger
           or discipline me in your wrath.

     2 Be merciful to me, LORD, for I am faint;
           O LORD, heal me, for my bones are in agony.

     3 My soul is in anguish.
           How long, O LORD, how long?

     4 Turn, O LORD, and deliver me;
           save me because of your unfailing love.

     5 No one remembers you when he is dead.
           Who praises you from the grave [b] ?

     6 I am worn out from groaning;
           all night long I flood my bed with weeping
           and drench my couch with tears.

     7 My eyes grow weak with sorrow;
           they fail because of all my foes.

     8 Away from me, all you who do evil,
           for the LORD has heard my weeping.

     9 The LORD has heard my cry for mercy;
           the LORD accepts my prayer.

     10 All my enemies will be ashamed and dismayed;
           they will turn back in sudden disgrace.

    I don't know if it helps knowing God hears your crys and your prayers, but I hope it does.

    PS - Yikes!  I am turning into my parents quoting scripture!!! LOL  What do think Saint???? Surprised

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  • EWB
    EWB Member Posts: 2,927
    edited November 2008

    Granny- so glad to hear you are doing well

    Held- I thought it might creap my out a little when I really thought about God hearing and knowing what is in my heart (good bag & the ugly) but it actually is more soothing and comforting.  I don't have to try and explain and get the words right- God just gets it. 

    I really like the phrase Granny used- "in my worship tradition" as well as "Where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is the one true Church..."  It is sad to me that so many people thru out the world spend so much effort in proving that their worship tradition and rituals are the one true church.  Seems to me "where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is the one true Church..." says it all. No religion or tradition is mentioned.  God is God regardless of the name we use, regardless of the worship tradition and rituals, regardless of where we live. I wonder how much could be accomplished if we all heeded to call and tended to the flock with out judgement.

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  • moodyk13
    moodyk13 Member Posts: 1,180
    edited November 2008

    Granny Praise God you are doing so well!!!!!  Are you Methodist?  I was for 30 years and we used to say the Apostles Creed- just curious.

    Held- I have got to say you have blessed me so much.  You started a thread looking for a mentor and oh my how God has been using you!!!!!!!  Not only have you brought some beautiful people together, you are mentoring to others in need.  What a beautiful person you are!  And because of your thread, I started the bible study thread and it has been so wonderful and there are a few there that were reluctant to join b/c they just dont have much of a relationship with Jesus.  But guess what......they are there and posting questions and so interested in renewing or beginning a relationship with our Heavenly Father.

    You have impacted so many people and I give praise to God everyday that you are doing as God has called you to do!

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  • EWB
    EWB Member Posts: 2,927
    edited November 2008

    Amen to that!. There is a plan for all of us, some times quietly, some times not.

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  • pinkpig
    pinkpig Member Posts: 228
    edited November 2008

    Just popping in to say hi. 

     Great passage, Held,

      Pinkylee, you are only expressing what every one of us has felt at one time or another on this crappy journey in cancer world.  For me, knowing God is with me is the only thing that makes it bearable.  My  advice to anyone I know that is diagnosed with breast cancer is to have the journey they need to have.  If that is feeling like crap, feel like crap, if it's yelling a screaming at God, yell and scream away.  He can take it.  If you feel fine and can go on with life, do that.  I think I had the perception, as a Christian and regular church goer (not so much lately), that I there was a 'right way' to go through cancer.  I'm not sure what it was, but I was pretty sure it required a lot of smiling, being cheerful, thankful for the trial, and no whinning or complaining.  I can assure you I have not been that cheerful  and have done plenty of whinning and complaining.  I have also been thankful that God has promised to be there through all of it, but not thankful for going through it.  I had a friend that was so excited that I would really learn a lot through this.  Well maybe excited is not the right term, maybe it was what made sense to her that I had to go through this.  Anyway I told our Women's pastor about that, with bitterness in my voice, and she remarked that I'd probably rather have read the book.  I replied that I wouldn't have even bought the book.  I am not one of those people that think cancer is the best thing that ever happened to me.  Have I learned stuff, yes.  Am I a better person, probably. Do I know God better and trust Him more, yes.   And yet I have not enjoyed any of the chemo, my hair falling out twice, two mastectomies, etc, etc.  So pinkylee - know that you are in the right place to let your hair down and yell, scream, whine and cry.  We're with ya sister.

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  • PinkyLee
    PinkyLee Member Posts: 648
    edited November 2008

    Pinkpig,

    thank you  so much for your words.  I have always been a "good christian" and regular church goer.  I went back to church for the first time since surgery last week.  I live in a small town and we only have services on 2nd and 4th sunday, which is good for me right now since I don't know if I could take every Sunday. 

    I started out trying not to complain and smile, but the reality of how I feel began to take its toll.  I haven't done much screaming, and I am very pissed at one of my children for not calling or coming to see me since surgery, but she is a self centered little girl anyhow.  She had the nerve to call me today and see if I could travel to visit her for christmas.  I didn't complain, I just asked if she was going to pay my fare.

    I hope that God has a larger plan for me going through this.  I am praying that at the end, I will be a more patient better person. I do know that I have learned to hold my tongue and not say everything that comes to mind since I am totally financially dependant on someone else. 

    I have always been the person who didn't need anyone, and now I need help in everyday life.  Maybe that is my lesson...we all need someone at sometime in life.

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  • Granny71
    Granny71 Member Posts: 58
    edited November 2008

    Yes, Moody, I am affiliated with a Methodist Church.  I'm not strong on denominations, but several years ago, I sensed the Spirit's leading to return to the Methodist tradition where I got my start in the Lord's service as a teen-ager. .

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  • saint
    saint Member Posts: 1,877
    edited November 2008

    EWB--Yep--He gets it! One of my reasons for NOT praying specifically! God KNOWS what is in our hearts & minds---knows what we want! It brings me comfort too! HUGS!

    Moody--In my experience every Christian church I have attended says the Apostles Creed--just an observation..but I think it is a wonderful thing/ one of those prayers like the Lord's Prayer that unites us across the differences!

    Granny--glad to have you back & good to know things went well at your procedure. I'm lighting a candle this AM for you & all here...

    Held-what do I think?? I think you step up to the plate & allow the spirit to use you when called! Blessings & hugs, hon.

    Pinky--one of the things bc taught me is how to let someone else "minister" to me.... I have always been independent & the one who helped others. It was SO hard to accept help, but in NEEDING help it occurred to me: Who can we take our compassionate help to if NO ONE wants or accepts it??? Sorta set me on my a$$ to realize THAT one! Hope the perspective helps you=hugs

    be well & stay strong!

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  • faithandfifty
    faithandfifty Member Posts: 10,007
    edited November 2008

    I always enjoy reading along here..... so much to ponder.

    We had a great day taking a road trip to be with extended family. My DH's neice is 41 and about to have their fouth child. Their oldest is 16 and getting her driver's license this week. Just imagine starting over with a baby: whew. Their first 3 are all girls -- and they chose not to find out the sex up to this point.... so it's gonna be a big surprise!

    I love reading the passages where our Creator's compassion for our story shines thru so completely. Thanks for the reminder.

    xx00xx00xx00xx

    hugs all around the thread -- to those posting and those reading.

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  • moodyk13
    moodyk13 Member Posts: 1,180
    edited November 2008

    Saint & EWB this is for you and I hope it brings you comfort:

    Romans 8:26 & 27 "Likewise the Spirit also helps in our weaknesses.  For we don't know how to pray for what we need. But the Spirit Himself makes intercession for us with groanings that cannot be expressed in words.  Now He who searches our hearts knows what the Spirit has in mind. The Spirit intercedes for God's people the way God wants him to."

    Isnt that cool!

    Saint, not every christian church says the apostle's creed.  baptists dont say it---okay there may be some that do, but none i have ever been to.  i dont know about other denominations.  non-denominational churchs dont say it either.

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  • saint
    saint Member Posts: 1,877
    edited November 2008

    Thanx Moody--as my sisters like to say, "...All I'm saying" LOL

    As for the Apostle's Creed--I did not mean to imply that ALL Christian churches say it, only that it is a common prayer among many --not just Methodist....So that was a lucky guess! 

    Be well & stay strong--F&F-wish it was last Sun nite....HUGS 

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  • Hindsfeet
    Hindsfeet Member Posts: 2,456
    edited November 2008

    I enjoyed reading this tread. One thing I know, people are fragile. Especially when stressed by cancer, or other such trials. Stress puts us on edge and we may easily react to all that is being thrown at us. 

    What comforts me is that I know my life and times are in God's hands. Nothing, no cancer bullet, or anything can touch me without God's concern and ultimately His permission. Right now, for me, in light of tough choices God's Word is my anchor. I'm holding on to His Word less I sink into dispair. He is my rock in this storm.

    Seems as if Held has a lot of prayer support. That's the best help anyone can get. God Bless, B 

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  • Onehalf
    Onehalf Member Posts: 171
    edited November 2008

    I believe we are all given paths in our lives and it is up to us how we go down these paths.

    Sometimes we may not understand, sometimes we may not know.....these paths may cross with other ones......And we may not discover this till later....

    When I first found out I had Breast Cancer, I laid on my bed and cried.....then 20 minutes later I got up and thought self pitty is not going to change one thing. It is here and I could fight or not. I could be happy or depressed....It is my choice. Guess what I choose!. My focus is, I am really lucky.....medical science has given me opportunties.

    I also look at this as, I am on a new path in life and what am I going to do with it?! I am going to educate myself.....so I can educate others.

    Healing first begins with the mind.....

    Now I will take the path, head up.....with a new look (of baldness, hey I had the hair for 48 years, time to start over...right!).....LOL!

    Be strong!

    Denise

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  • moodyk13
    moodyk13 Member Posts: 1,180
    edited November 2008

    Thanks Saint Laughing

    I want to invite everyone here to join us on a thread that is called "bible study for the biblically challenged"  you can connect to it here:  http://community.breastcancer.org/forum/38/topic/724805?page=1

    We are studying women in the bible and we started with Sarah, Abrahams wife.  It was amazing realizing that she wouldn't wait on God and took matters into her own hands and what that means for us today. 

    Just take a look if you get a chance and chime in anytime. 

    This thread is PERFECT for encouraging and lifting each other up.  The bible study thread is merely an opportunity to dive into His word and find ways to continue to encourage and lift each other up!  Laughing

    Held is the reason I started it, God bless her for listening to God!  I pray that these two threads and reach many, many, people women and men for the glory of God and the Strength we all need during these "unsure" times.

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  • Held
    Held Member Posts: 506
    edited November 2008

    I would put my 2 cents in here again, but I am so friggin' tired and my thoughts keep going around in circles so I don't know what my 2 cents are!  Insomnia strikes again, and with it the "almost" seizures.  Ugh!  I am annoyed.

    To Medicate or Not to Medicate....that is the question.  Praying for wisdom, all prayers appreciated, thank you.  My dh's snoring is NOT helping!

    BTW PinklyLee - I think the lesson I needed to learn was to stop stuffing all my feeling down and sucking it up when mean people were.... well mean.  I  have learned to stop "taking it" in front of them, and then falling apart in private.  I have learned to stick up for myself so I can stop kicking myself and putting myself down so much.  Now, if I could just learn how to do that with grace, respect and the ability to maintain the dignity of all involved, I would be in business!  Hmmm, sounds like a need for more wisdom.

    I have a REALLY, REALLY weird question to ask.  What would be the places that you guys would consider unacceptable places to read the Bible?

    I miss you guys!

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