Starting Chemo May 2008

Hey all, on my third vicodin and have managed to keep the bad pain away.  The only down side is that after this last chemo round, I am so fricking tired. WTF?????

Anyway, I am in No. California,about an hour north of Sacramento.

Just finished dinner, pigs in a blanket, mashed taters and fresh corn, time for a nap....lol...

glad you loved the picture, it i now my screen saver......

later gators, randie

Wow - You all have been talkative.  I have been birthday partying.  She's 5 now!  (Well, actually on Monday, but try to tell that to her!)

Before I forget, I'm in Atascadero, CA which is on the Central Coast, about 4 hours north of LA and 4 hours south of San Francisco. 

I want to respond to a bunch of stuff, but have forgotten most of it and, dang it all, I'm now on another page!  I do remember Randie's picture though - LOVED IT!!  And Adrienne, at first when you said something about Eddie taking a picture with Christine, I had to think twice about that!

I managed to get through the party okay, but the soreness and tiredness caught up with me this afternoon.  Slept an hour and a half - sent the newly-turned 5 y.o. home with Grandma. 

I'll catch up better tomorrow - off to watch a video now!

From Lamb to Ewe,

I was just saying the same thing to Drew (husband).. one iota at a time...

Last Thursday I did not know myself..I was literally having an out-of-life experience and could not have been more down nor disconnected. The mouth ulcers, the kilometer of swollen gut, the lead legs, the nappy rash, the threatening UTI. The mad sleeplessness.

But today I feel relatively normal and I'm getting VERY excited about the LAST poisoning. I'm starting a diet tomorrow..not really a diet as such, but my new eating regime for the rest of my life. I've got 20 lbs to lose, and I am actually quite alarmed at how much I crave sugar atm. Is this normal? Is it the tax?

For my last go I'm going to skip the neulasta all together, and am rethinking the dex. Any suggestions girls? Is the dex absolutely necessary? I was on 4mg x 3 times x 3 days, then 8mg x 3 x 3 days, but coming off it was unbearable. What sayest thou (s)? 

When did we all turn renaissance?? Moi also sayeth, I was told that the effects of the steroids were MUCH better than what you can get if you have an allergic reaction to the chemo. You only have one more time daulink, hang in there you are right at the water edge with your toe testing it out. I am now done sayingest (ya i know its not a word but it fit)

I also worked on a new layout for a job yesterday. Two minor changes and it was approved. YAY me! Considering all the design knowledge that I have, all of it was learned along the way and not schooled, it made my day. Bossman is determined that I will be a full designer and do the large machines without guidance one day. I'm happy to stick with the small ones for now. In college I learned how to draw it and make it in the machine shop (sorta), that's it. And nowadays most places really don't care about presentation. As long as it is slapped on a piece of paper and "maybe" everything is documented that's all most care about. Me.... I want it to look good as well, so does bossman so we have  a common ground. We do sometimes work with another company that has an older gentleman that still hand drafts designs. That is truly a lost art. His handwriting is so perfect. I'm betting he can handdraft faster than a person on a computer. I can talk about pencils and papers and computers all day.... I digress lol.

Last nite we spent the evening at gf and bossman's house playing a role playing game with each other. We have our office in the basement hooked up with their house computers so we can play. Fun evening for all. And like eddie, I also feel a bit more normal. I have 3 more weeks before my herceptin starts.. I want to pack as much "normal" in those 3 weeks as possible. And that includes talking to my head and hoping it makes my hair grow faster LOL

Kerri--you might want to ask your onc about tapering you off the dex instead of just stopping it suddenly.  Whenever we take a steroid that the body produces (or similar to one),  the body stops making it while we're taking it....so by day 6 or 7 of taking dex your body has pretty well shut down production, which is why you're having such a hard time coming off of it--your body isn't getting the message to start ramping up production again.

There are several ways to do a taper, but the one my onc has me on looks like this:

 8 mg 2xday pretreatment day;  Tx day in IV bag; Posttx: 8 mg 2xday x 2 days; 4mg 3xday x 1 day; 4 mg 2xday x 1 day; 4 mg 1xday x 1 day.  

I didn't start the taper till tx 3,  but I didn't feel any problem coming off this way at all...and it really seemed to help me bounce back a little faster, I thought.  I had my 4th tx on 9/11, so I'm still in the middle of the taper right now.  We'll see how it works with this last one.

Hope this helps! 

Sherri

Kerri,

I complained to my onc and she took me off of it after the 2nd tx, I just got the dex in the drip along with the benadryl.  She told me as long as I didn;t have any SEs from the taxol, niot to worry..... hope that heklps, randie

Kerry,

Here is my say on steroids....My first taxol I took 60 mg (20 in bag that morning, 20 the night before and 20 the morning of...). Coming off was unbearable. Second time out, I did 36 (16 in bag that morning; 10 the night before and 10 the morning of...) That was better but more painful. Third time I did the same. Last time I cut a drop more. Coming off steroids is TOTAL hell. It is the worst. However, pain can be tough. I much preferred pain to weepy/bitchy although I was weepy/bitchy anyway (think about how much worse it would have been if I'd stayed on 60 mg). Kerry, you have ONE more then you're done. Do what feels right to you and know that no matter what, the last time is different because it is the last time. Just let yourself get through. I was extremly bummed out and numb after even though I was relieved and happy. Bottom line is that some expect everything to be ok the next day and it isn't. This is your last cummulative treatment and your body will react to it even though your emotional self has some adren. going to get you through. The good news is that you are nearly DONE DONE DONE. Follow you heart. Follow your body. I tried to get out of the last neulasta and was told no, no, no. Maybe, though, it is because I get herceptin on Friday. Jen, I am headed for the farmer's market but not before I go check the mirror for eyelash stubble...I think you are beating my (*& on that now but I'll let you know.   I get to start my cancer rehab program tomorrow afternoon and will fill you all in on it. Rock, you hang out with very cool people. I thought it was cool to hang out with our governor thee last two days but you get to hang out AND go kayaking. I am going to swim in Lake Washington this afternoon. Woo hoo! Happy Sunday.

Add Sueper to the list--I'm north of Fort Worth, Texas.  Ike was anti-climactic here--it rained sideways for all of Saturday afternoon, and then was gone--but left in it's wake marvelously cool temperatures, and it feels like autumn.  WONDERFUL when it hasn't been below the nineties for WEEKS--it gives me energy.  I feel like my returning to my normal energy level will parallel the temp becoming cooler (that may be bullshit but if I believe it, so be it.)

I had my first pedicure post-chemo on Saturday and then an afternoon of antique shopping with my best friend.  Only problem was, I woke up today with my whole body hurting and spent the afternoon in the recliner!! Oh, well, whatever it takes.

Good wishes for a happy week and chemooooo to all

Love,

Sue 

Sue -- I got nothing to say to you specifically. I just wanted to say "Sue, girlfriend...hugs."

Jen -- Your pictures of your neighbor's house in the Midwest, the word "driveway"...it all yanks at my heartstrings. I swear if someone says "porch swing" I may tear up.

 I enjoyed paddling around in a kayak the last two days.  Ms. Coordination here, though, nearly dropped my ass in the water upon dismount, and nearly vaulted my friend (who was standing on the dock) over the kayak and into the lake for good measure.  

Peeps, as you may have noticed, my sense of humor seems to have gone the way of . . well, whatever goes away. I'm not in a bad mood. I'm not depressed. But I'm not exactly jocko the freaking clown, either.  Am trying to get motivated for the week.  Am also wondering if part of my lethargy and apathy is due to the anemia and the fact that I have been living off of grape tomatoes which are not known for being a rich source of iron.

Kerry -- "From Lamb to Ewe"... that is just baaaaaaaaaad. 

*******

IN CONCLUSION AND MOST IMPORTANTLY -- Karin, donde estas?  I am el-worried about you!

xo 

I second the question about Karin.

I swam in Lake Washington today. Ahhhhh.

I found one little tiny eyebrow hair but I think it is wishful thinking...thanks Jen. Hope YOUR house is okay.

Jean, how you doing friend?

Sue, that is what recliners are for....relax, hon, you deserve it. Find any good antiques?

Kerry, steroids suck but you can get a lot done around the house.

Rock, you rock.

Goodnight 

Yup house is ok, thanks :O) just some small dropped limbs out back. The news said tonight that the wind gusts were up to 70mph. It knocked my little one off his feet once and he scrapped up his knees poor kiddo. He was trying to help daddy clear out some limbs. Most of the schools in the county are closed tomorrow and 200,000+ are out of power in my county and 700,000 in the next county over. What a mess.

Eddie~ YAY!!!!!!!! Once one finds its way home the rest will follow!!! I think you still have more hair than I do at this point. I can't wait for all of us to start posted hair pics!

Noelle~ been considering painting my nails but they haven't changed colors too awful bad. They are slightly brownish and just hurt to touch. I'm hoping they don't get any worse. They seem to be growing pretty good as well.

Other thinds I have notice...I had oily skin before and it was gorgeous during chemo... It is started to return ever so slightly to oily. My skin keratin problem is starting to return damnit!

Ladies, have a wonderful week!!!!!!!!!!!

p.s. did you know that crocs were recyclable???? they grind them down and make new shoes out of them and donate them to needy countries. I think I like my ugly shoes even more now.

I have resisted the whole idea of chemobrain or menopause stupidity and what have you.  Having said that, however, there are some behaviors that are hard to account for otherwise.

Ferinstance: On the road trip with my little sister. I do most of the driving. Because I'm the oldest. Anyway, we buy groceries. Coming back to the car, I am juggling a large cup of coffee in my left hand and car keys in the right hand.   Little sis opens the car door for me. I get into the driver's seat, but I don't have a hand free to close the door. So what do I do? Do I put the keys in the ignition and free up a hand? NOOOOOOOOOOOO. I DROP THE CAR KEYS BETWEEN THE SEATS.  

Cris -- pass the scraped off cupcakes and the frosting over here, thank you very much.

Eddie -- at the end of chemo, my eyebrows started to come in and then they all fell out again. But now about 60 hairs appeared overnight.  Swimmin' in Lake Washington.... did that feel as good as it sounds?  (The photo of you with colleagues and gov == very cool. I'm glad you tipped us off to the gov's made-up appearance because it was a little scary!)

Noelle -- and to think, I just recycled the Sept issue of Vogue, dangit. Any chance you're in town pre-January?? (Congrats on the Return of the Ass.)

I need to shift it into gear this morning so must sign off. Toodle-oo.

Women!!  Help!  I need a reality check.  I have been going swimmingly (pun intended) along with this last treatment, not really bad nausea, no constipation to speak of, mostly just my complete body ache from head to toe (literally). 

But today...today.  Today I noticed there are two spots under the lymph node side (and the same arm as previously) that has 2 bumps which look suspiciously like the bumps that became horrifically infected while we were at Disneyland.  Guess what?  Next weekend is the trip with older dd to San Jose for the gymnastics exhibition.  Crap.  Oh wait, I'm getting to that part...

And then, earlier, I was just sitting here and had ***TMI Warning*** what felt like some gas.  I have noticed more stomach issues the last few times and also with the Taxotere.  I am used to stomach issues because of my IBS.  But, what I thought was going to be just gas, came out as something more solid.  And what really bothers me (besides the fact that I soiled myself!) is that I couldn't tell. 

And, I'm getting my usual post-treatment yeast infection along with my not-absent period.  WTF??!   All I can say, is it's a really good thing I was not at work this morning.  Obviously, I will be calling the onc's office shortly...

Cris~ I feel for you. Had that same thing happen to me a few times..... Like they said in the bucketlist. Never trust a fart.The taxol gave me to shits and giggles as well. Maybe it is from that. Yeast infec... yup had plenty of those as well. Bulk up on yogurt or acidopilus (sp?) You are getting close to the end sweetie, hang in there!

Hi ladies,

Well i'm settled in my new digs and had my first radiation today. It went fine, just a little unsettling when the machine clicks in. One time i kinda flinched and was hoping things were still lined up ! My arm is sore from holding it still for so long, thats the hardest part .

My dh came over with me and stayed till after the appt. so that was nice. He's on his way home so now i have to entertain myself Picked myself up a puzzle so might get into that....see if i can handle that much excitement !!!

Cris I hope things get better for you  !! 

Well have a good rest of the day ..cheers