I am an optimist by nature. You?

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  • anneshirley
    anneshirley Member Posts: 1,110
    edited August 2008

    Tina--nice response.  The feelings you describe have nothing to do with being positive or an optimist.  Like me, you're enjoying the wonderful sensations of being alive.  Yesterday, the sun finally came out--I'm in Maine where it's been raining for weeks--and I spent part of my morning just walking around looking at the new flowers, dead heading others, and just enjoying the sensation of being alive in a beautiful world.  And in the afternoon we took a ride to Schoodic Peninsula, part of  Acadia National Park, and sat on the rocks looking at the birds and enjoying the sun on our backs, and I loved it. If there's a gold standard in cynicism, I'm it.  But not about being and staying alive for as long as I can.  Not sure about the spiders though.  I had too many spider bites this summer! 

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  • pip57
    pip57 Member Posts: 12,401
    edited August 2008

    You girls have inspired a new thread.  I am going to start "alive moments" to tell lovely experiences like yours.

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  • Lucy47
    Lucy47 Member Posts: 183
    edited August 2008

    Tina...thank you so much for that post......you just brought everything back into perspective. All though I didn't feel well during my chemo days..I still new that everyday would get better ( the storm before the calm). But right now I am enjoying the beautiful sunny day looking out at my garden and it's beautiful blooms. The crystal blue water of my pool and the bright green grass. The soft wind is blowing the leaves on the tall trees and the birds are sitting on the branches enjoying the lazy day. But I am glad I don't see any spiders lol.

    Hope everyone is enjoying their day as well

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  • BethNY
    BethNY Member Posts: 2,710
    edited August 2008

    I get goosebumps just reading those posts.  My heart gets all warm and my tummy gets tingly.  I know you just get it-- you totally understand how I feel on the inside. 

    It's so hard to describe but it's a warm passion for life.  Every day I can't wait to get up b/c I am so excited for what will happen next. I always think, the day that I'm in the worst mood, that I don't want to go outside, might be the day where I have the chance to touch somebodys life.

    Someone once asked me, Are you always like this?  They said, Do you ever turn it off?

     I can't.  It's just the way I'm built.  I generally don't even try explaining it to other people, but Tina- just reading your post makes it so clear to me why we're friends...

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  • shokk
    shokk Member Posts: 1,763
    edited August 2008

    Beth I think you are just optimistic about being optimistic......Laughing........in life there are happy people (have an excess of serotonin and then sad people (not enough serotonin)..........I think the majority of us fall somewhere in between...........but remember to experience great joy in life one must also experience great sorrow...............it's just how we act after life experiences............but that's ok..........if all of us were optimistic and there weren't us "realist" then think how boring that would be..........all you optimistic running around wouldn't be able to say "jeez sure am glad I'm not such a pestimist"..............it takes all kinds to make this world as great as it is.........imo.........Shokk

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  • Joyce-PA
    Joyce-PA Member Posts: 122
    edited August 2008

    I try and be optimistic.  In the last five years, I have been through alot.  My mom passed away in April 2003 and 3 mos. later my husband passed away.  He was diagnosed w/lung cancer in June 03 and passed away 6 weeks later.    When I was diagnosed with bc last year, initially, felt sorry for myself, "why me", "I shouldn't have to go through this alone"...  My philosopy is you have to go with the cards you are dealt with - can't turn back the hands of time and I would like to believe that God doesn't give us anything we can't handle.  I have good days and bad days but that's the way life is.   Hopefully, all this has made me a stronger person.

    Joyce

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  • pinoideae
    pinoideae Member Posts: 1,271
    edited August 2008

    Here is a link to an article in the New York Times called Optimism`s Bright Side: A Healthy, Longer Life. 

     http://query.nytimes.com/gst/fullpage.html?res=9C00E5DB123FF933A05755C0A96E958260&sec=&spon=&pagewanted=all

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  • NicRic
    NicRic Member Posts: 32
    edited August 2008

    I'm posting here because I'm not sure if I'm an optimist or just plain in denial.  Last year about this time I had a lumpectomy followed by mammosite radiation.  Two weeks later, my husband and I took a 6 week trip across BC, Waterton, Glacier, Tetons, Moab, Utah.  I hiked, biked, sea kayaked, canoed, camped, hardly missing a beat.  In December I had a hysterectomy due to enlarged uterus/fibroids, but kept my ovaries because I felt I couldn't handle surgical menopause - against the recommendation of the onc and original gyn  (I'm 50).  I was out of work for 3 weeks then resumed a fairly stressful contract job.  I worked until June then I was back out west for a 3 week canoe trip in NWT, backpacking, hiking, etc. for the last 2 months. 

     Anyways, I haven't been back for any type of follow-up.  I live a very adventurous life and now I say to people who ask about my feelings on breast cancer 'Ah, that was so last year.'  I guess it's just tonight, sitting in a hotel room (finally out of the rain), I'm thinking it's time I start talking to doctors again.  Maybe this delay is my way of dealing with the diagnosis.  I can't remember all the stats concerning the b/c but I am very lucky that it was early stage.   So am I an optimist or just plain stupid? 

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  • FEB
    FEB Member Posts: 552
    edited August 2008

    Nicole, I do not think that you are being stupid at all. I think that a one of the best ways to be sure you will end up with cancer again is to believe you will. I had a determination from the dx, that once I got through treatments, that was it, I was done with it and I totally believe it will not return. I too have not been back to the docs. Why should I? I am doing fine and going there only depresses me. I am being checked regularly by another doc, so I feel confindent there.

     I did not have a very happy childhood and I remember watching a lot of old movies. There was one with Danny Kaye that I will never forget. I don't remember the name of it, but it was about a little girl in an iron lung with polio. He sang a song to her "When I'm worried, and I can't sleep, I count my blessings instead of sheep, and I fall asleep, counting my blessings". That song has stayed with me my whole life. So I can count so many blessings today, that helped me get through all this. Number one is the fact that my BC was caught early, and I have been given a chance to move on without looking back.

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  • pip57
    pip57 Member Posts: 12,401
    edited August 2008

    The Five Pennies  The song was also in White Christmas.

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  • Harley44
    Harley44 Member Posts: 5,446
    edited August 2008

    Nicole,

    I don't think you are in denial, or being stupid.  You made a decision about your treatment plan, and followed through, without looking back.  I think that is great!

    I had a pathology very similar to yours, and I anguished over my treatment decision whether to get chemo or not.  I even had an Oncotype Dx test done, and the results were right in the middle...  Initially, my onc and I decided not to do chemo., but I couldn't feel comfortable with that decision.

    So I finally decided that the only way I was going to feel ok with my decision was if I just sucked it up and went ahead with chemo, in spite of my fears.  I only had 4 txs of Taxotere & Cytoxan.  But, now I feel that I can say that I did everything I could do prevent recurrence...  that is the only way I could have peace with my decision. 

    I think it is GREAT that you made your decision and feel good about it.  I also feel good about my decision, and agree with you...  If I can, I try to stay away from the drs.!  I am feeling great also!

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  • NoH8
    NoH8 Member Posts: 2,726
    edited August 2008

    Great post. I've picked up on a lot of bitterness from survivors who post on message boards too.

    I'm a huge optimist, but also a realist. What I mean by that is that I most always look on the positive side of things and find the silver lining in the cloud, but I don't go into denial mode. Like abbadoo says, it's about the moment. The day I was diagnosed with breast cancer I thought about how lucky I was. Lucky to have pushed to have the lump removed when the surgeon wanted to wait 3-6 months because he was sure it wasn't cancer---lucky that I caught the cancer early---lucky that I had a common cancer with lots of awareness, research and treatment---lucky that I had this rather than something horrible like ALS (the disease i fear most in the world), Hunington's or Alzheimer's etc.

    When I had the fire in June I just kept thinking, while I watched the flames, please please let my babies (kitties) be ok. I can deal with everything if they are ok. When the firefighters brought out 2 of the cats and I had to wait a few days to find the third and a few weeks to find the 4th, I felt grateful to have the ones I did. The fire was in many ways more acutely stressful than cancer but I kept reminding myself I had my babies.

    I'm not a polyanna by any means, just grateful for life. Cancer gave me the opportunity to realize that I was going to die sometime whether from cancer or something else and when that times comes I knew I wasn't going to regret not spending more time being miserable. I want as few regrets as possible when my life comes to an end.

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