Diagnosed in July

MarvieS

I was diagnosed four weeks ago, right before my 48th birthday. I have spent many sleepless nights since then, reading many topics and stories and I wanted to say Thank You to this forum and everyone on here giving advice and support. It has been an emotional roller coaster and as of right now I don't know how to make it through this but I understand that putting one foot in front of the other and trying to live in reality as much as possible might help. I'm an over-worrier and over-thinker, which of course does not help.
12 years ago I was diagnosed with MS. A year later I was accepted into a clinic trial and had a Stem Cell Transplant. It put my MS into long-term remission, I haven't had a relapse since then and except for some flare ups of old symptoms and a Fibromyalgia diagnosis in 2012 I have had a good run. Now of course with the anxiety it all changed and I am just trying to make it through this new reality. I have read from others on here that the time before treatment starts is the worst and I hope that is true.
really like my Breast Surgeon, have only met her once but she is warm and kind and I feel very confident with the information she provided, but my biggest concern is that they cannot get me into surgery before September which will be 7-8 weeks after diagnosis. I will see her again next week and still hope she can get me in sooner.

I wish everyone going through this much strength.

Moderators

Hi MarvieS and welcome to Breastcancer.org.

We're so very sorry to hear of your diagnosis, but we're so glad you've found us. You're sure to find our incredible Community and amazing source of advice, information, encouragement, and support -- we're all here for you!

Others will be by soon to welcome you. But we wanted to let you know your concerns about timing and the urgency you feel vs. reality is an issue many of our members experience. Just know that in the grand scheme of things, waiting a few more weeks for surgery shouldn't make much of an impact.

Try to stay calm and positive while you wait, and in the meantime, we're here to help you understand what's ahead and support you the whole way! We look forward to seeing you around the boards!

--The Mods

Salamandra

Hi Marvie,

I'm so glad this forum was helpful for you. I can say it has been a lifeline for me as well. I'm sorry you're going through this additional bout of health issues. I'm sure all the experience with it has some positives, but whew that is a lot for a single person.

FWIW, 7-8 weeks before surgery doesn't sound crazy based on what I've learned from the boards. Your hormone positive early stage cancer is likely very slow growing. Breast cancer feels like an emergency, but in terms of rushing the treatment, it's not always necessary. But psychologically it is really hard to *know* that it's in you and you just want it out. I would ask the doctor's office to keep you on a waiting list in case something opens up earlier, but since you really like your breast surgeon I wouldn't look for a different earlier provider. I would consider the speeding it up to be more for your emotional health than the physical health.

But cancer can absolutely take a toll on your emotional health. My cancer center had social workers and psychiatrists to provide support and I have and continue to use both. I definitely encourage you to use any resources and supports that you have access to. The anxiety is a beast.

Good luck!!

Aklynna

Hello!

I was also diagnosed in July with what sounds like a very similar diagnosis- very small ER+, HER2-.

Like you, I am very much an over thinker and worrier. There is so much to process and research, and therefore worry about.

I actually wanted to delay my surgery due to some upcoming plans over the next 2 months. I met with 2 different surgeons and wile they both assured me that my IDC was not a fast growing cancer they prefer to do it within 6-8 weeks.

I have been thru many different topics and boards and have found a lot of great information.

Best of luck to you

MarvieS

Thank you very much for the warm welcome. I'm so glad my doctor recommended this community. She said I am not allowed to google and to only get my information from this site 🙂 It is good to hear that a couple more weeks until surgery should not have much of an impact.

Salamandra - Thank you so much for your advice on the social workers and psychiatrists, I will definitely check if that is available to me. And I agree, the anxiety and emotional stress are the worst. You are right, I thought about getting a second opinion but after I met my BS I felt very confident to move forward with her. I hope you are doing well. 🤗

Aklynna - Thank you so much for sharing the information you got from the two surgeons, that made me feel better. I'm sorry that your plans got derailed but I hope you can do whatever you had planned after successful treatment. I had a trip to Europe coming up in September but it will have to wait. We will get through this. 🤗Wishing you best of luck as well.

EminGA2018

Hi Marvie,

I’m so sorry you find yourself on this journey but you’re in the right place in this community. I received my DX on July 2nd. My dx sounds similar to yours and I was assured my cancer is slow growing. I have a BMX scheduled August 24th. (Right side is prophylactic). 6-8 weeks between DX to surgery seems pretty reasonable Like you…I am an anxious person. This community has been a lifeline and a great source of inspiration and peace. It feels so overwhelming at first but slowly the new normal sinks in. However you deal with this…whether you are stoic one minute and crying the next..it’s all okay. You can handle this. Be kind to yourself! Wishing you the very best!

MarvieS

Hello Emin,

Thank you so much for your wishes. I'm sure getting a cancer diagnosis is terrible for everyone but for us anxious people this is such a hard thing to deal with. Good to hear that you were assured that your cancer is slow growing and that you got your BMX scheduled. Did they give you an option between BMX and lumpectomy? I believe that if they give us an option it is a very personal decision but I still wonder if I should opt for BMX. My Breast Surgeon said that it is so tiny that a lumpectomy plus radiation would be best but my Breast MRI showed another tiny spot (same side) that they think are calcifications but will be biopsied during surgery. I still wonder if BMX would make more sense but will need to discuss with her.

I wish you all the best with your surgery and hope you keep us posted. You are right that this community feels like a lifeline. I'm so grateful for all the encouraging words and advice and hope someday I can give this back. Thank you 🤗

moth

Marvie and others, you may want to check out the recent studies showing *better* overall survival with lumpectomy + rads over mastectomy.

see this: https://www.breastcancer.org/research-news/lumpect...

and a new one https://www.mdpi.com/2072-6694/13/16/4044

MarvieS

Thank you so much Moth, this is really helpful information and at least for me quite surprising. While my BS said that survival rates are the same, on the sheet she gave me it showed recurrence rate for Mastectomy at 2-6% and Lumpectomy with radiation at 4-8%. I didn’t worry too much about the percentage since they are not that far off, I just thought with my anxiety it might be better to take them off but this is great information

Bookpusher

Marvie,

Just wanted to wish you well. The waiting is SO hard. I understand the anxiety issue very well and I just wanted to second the idea of getting on your surgeon’s cancellation list. It does happen, so tell her of your anxiety and that you will be very relieved to get the surgery at the earliest possible time.

Sending warm thoughts and prayers.

MarvieS

Bookpusher, thank you so much for your thoughts and prayers. I will see my surgeon on Tuesday and check if they have a cancellation list, good idea! Happy to read that you got your drains out and surgery went well for you. Hope the soreness goes away quickly. Sending warm thoughts your way as well.

Bookpusher

Just sent up a prayer a cancellation will open up for you!

I was so thankful I found a wonderful 2nd opinion surgeon who did my surgery 3 weeks earlier. My middle name should be anxiety -:)

Good luck!!

Esther01

Hi Marvie,

I'm so glad you posted. I understand the anxiety only too well and I'm glad others have reassured you that a small wait for the surgeon of your choice should not be an issue for you. Mine was slow growing, too. I used the waiting time to become an avid researcher like Moth (Moth, you are amazing, and you always teach me something new!). I wanted to know how this got there, what can I do to beat it up and kill it (while preserving my health and boosting my obviously-lower-than-I-thought immune system), and how do I maximize recovery while lowering the chance for a recurrence. I'm still learning like a sponge. Grateful for this forum and these wonderful ladies always ready to help each other.

I've also learned how important rest is during our treatment and recovery. When worry consumes me at night I have to tell myself, "No, this is my time to rest. No worries right now. I'm clearing my mind and resting now. This is my time." I'm joining Bookpusher in adding my prayers that all goes well for you as you prepare for surgery and also that you're able to sleep soundly.

Hugs and blessings,

Esther

MarvieS

Bookpusher - Thank you so much for the prayer, I will keep you updated. You and I would share the same middle name! Mine could be Ms. Anxiety or Ms. Impatient, both are a perfect fit 🙂 Hope you feel good today after getting your drains out.

MarvieS

Hi Esther,

thank you so much for your kind words and great advice. I'm so amazed by all you amazing ladies and the support in this forum. Four weeks ago I felt completely overwhelmed and didn't know how tomove forward. I'm still a bundle of nerves and anxiety but just to feel being a part of this community has helped so much. Thank you, Thank you, Thank you.
I agree with everything you said, especially the importance of rest and doing everything to maximize recovery and minimize recurrence. I have so much to learn and I know this is the right place. I'm glad your surgery went well and I hope for the same for your radiation therapy. Much love and hugs

MarvieS

Hi Bookpusher,

You seem to have some connections up there 🙂 Saw my surgeon today and they were able to move me up by one week. Thank you for the prayer!

Bookpusher

Marvie,

Yay!!! So glad you were moved up. I do believe in the power of prayer, I keep Him busy with requests

Cactushouse

I was also diagnosed in July, had a lumpectomy in August and Chemo starts in September. Things happened so fast, it was hard to have time to really take in everything. Chemo is what is causing me to have anxious moments and not sleeping. Any hints on how to approach Chemo infusions? Thanks for any thoughts.

moth

Cactushouse, sorry you find yourself here! Have you see the chemotherapy section? Start with some of the pinned posts. There is a weekly zoom support group and each month the people starting chemo that month start a new support thread so they can share how things are going.

This is the main chemo section https://community.breastcancer.org/forum/69

chemo is nothing like it is portrayed on tv. Most of us do just fine on it, symptoms are well managed. Some people even work full time or close to full time while doing their chemo.

hang in there!

MarvieS

Cactushouse - I wanted to send positive thoughts your way and hope your first chemo tomorrow goes well. I hope you find some sleep tonight. Will be thinking of you tomorrow.

Cactushouse

MarvieS-thanks so much for your kind words. I did complete my first chemo treatment and all went well. No reactions during my drips. I work up with a headache around 3:00 and decided to use meditation to lull myself back to sleep. It worked! Today my only side effect was to have flushed cheeks. No nausea, which i was so thankful for. I did call the nurse and she thought it might be a reaction to the Taxol. Not a lot of energy today but hoping tomorrow back to normal(whatever that looks like now). Thanks again for reaching out.