Recommendations for partner during COVID-19

sarahweeks

Hi everyone, I've just finished chemo and am about to be scheduled for a mastectomy. My partner is a musician, and has his own home, but stays with me most of the time. I get super concerned whenever he goes back to his house to make music with his housemate. I know he's concerned about safety and cleanliness for me, but his housemate really isn't. The housemate washes his hands, and understands the seriousness of the disease, but has also said "if I get it, I get it."

I don't want to have to send my partner back to his house for - who knows - a year, or whatever. I don't want to go through surgery alone.

How are you all doing with your partners who may need prompting to be careful about the virus? How are all you without partners managing - do you go to grocery stores, etc?

Thanks for any insight or advice.

sarahweeks

Well, I went through surgery, it went very well. My partner now says he would like to see a friend once in a while, and maybe practice with bandmates. I have suggested he go stay at his house for the foreseeable future if that's what he wants. Not in a mean way - it was a kind, tearful conversation. I don't know what we should do.

I have read the virus spreads primarily through sustained contact in a closed space between people, through the air. I believe that. I know all these people won't wear masks.

I am still curious how others with cancer handle having partners that go out. I can't see a good solution for us.

AliceBastable

My husband has had to work the entire time, just at reduced hours. His employer has been reasonably good - rules in place for mask wearing and use of sanitizer, plus temperature scans at the entrance and restrictions on how many people can be in a space. Most staff have been on admin leave and only the most essential employees have had to be there. Hubby switched from public transportation to driving, and takes his food rather than buying it somewhere. But there's no way to know how safely his few co-workers live in their private lives, so it's still a crapshoot.

Best of luck and health to you.