Advice on Sister's "Cancer Scares"

klynn56

My mom died from breast cancer 5 years ago - so I might be more sensitive on this topic than others.

My sister is a completely toxic individual. A few weeks ago, she posted a public message on Facebook that she had masses and had to go get additional testing. My family, her friends and strangers were worried sick that she had cancer. Flash forward two weeks and she's fine - they are just normal cysts.

She did a similar thing with her daughter last winter. She posted public messages on Facebook that her daughter had a spinal tumor and was admitted to the hospital and they were running all these tests. Everyone was worried sick her child had cancer. I immediately went to the hospital and doctors said they could not find anything wrong with my niece. In fact, they said she was a bit overweight and could benefit from exercise and stretching. My sister would not accept that, wouldn't let them release her and continued to post worrying things on Facebook.

This time, I privately told my family that I knew nothing was wrong with her and said that this was attention seeking behavior. My family is now mad at me. At this point, I am ready to distance myself from all of them. Given what we've been through with our mom, I think it is completely inappropriate to post that you think you have cancer on Facebook until you know for sure.

I just want advice from others who might be more reasonable on the issue.

Moderators

klynn56 we're sorry to hear about this situation, and the loss of your mom. Some people go to great lengths to get attention online. The situation with your sister appears to be more a personality issue than cancer. Whether people post their symptoms or diagnosis on social media is very personal. We're sorry you're dealing with this.

Yogatyme

klynn, this is a tough one for sure. My family has a member that has a history of this kind of behavior & has been dismissed by others over the years. When she actually did get cancer a few years ago it was impossible to dismiss when we were taking her for chemo. Now she is reporting a new cancer and my sister is dismissing it because of the past “fibs”. I am less inclined to do this because of my understanding of metastasis. Another sister is upset w 1st sister. I have no real advice for you but maybe if you share your doubts w others outside of the family you will feel better and not have to withdraw from family. Choosing to say nothing to family may not easy but can keep you in the family circle. Ultimately, crying wolf always has its consequences. For those who actually do have cancer, this kind of behavior is abhorant!! I hope you can find a peaceful place with this.