Newly Diagnosed Just scared

Mandyc19

Hello all I have just been diagnosed with Invasive Mammary Carcinoma. My ER+ PR+ Her2 - and Ki67 1% which is all good from what I have been told and the research I have done. So far they are thinking partial Mastectomy and 6-8 weeks of Radiation unless my genetic testing comes back adversely than Chemo would be back on the table and Mastectomy would be as well. I Have surgery scheduled for beginning of June as long as everything comes back well. I am just scared! I feel like I am in a Horrible dream where I can't wake up. I have said the words I have Breast Cancer like 800 time in the last week since I was diagnosed. I am only 40 I shouldn't have to say those words right? I know so far that my results are as good as I could hope for but I am still just so upset. I feel like I have to be strong for my family even though they have been great! I feel like I need to just keep moving or I am going to loose it mentally. Is anyone else feeling this way. Just feels good to talk to other Women who are going through the same thing. Thanks in advance.

Beesy_The_Other_One

Mandy,

I am so sorry you are here. This was a club no one wanted to join. The only thing I can tell you is that you have friends here who will be caring, who will hold your hand virtually, and will empower you with imparted wisdom. I agree that at forty you should not be dealing with this! This is a better and more accurate place to do research than using Google blindly. Much of what you will find there is inaccurate or old, so resist that temptation!

Everyone on here with a confirmed diagnosis remembers what you're feeling. It's okay to be honest that you're feeling that way! I'm glad to hear you have a supportive family. Let us know how we can help you more and keep us posted on your progress.

xo,

Beesy

Mandyc19

Beesy,

Thank you for your kind words. It is all just so overwhelming. I work in the Medical field and know sadly too many women that are in this club. So sorry you are in this boat too. I kinda feel like a zombie going through the motions at this point. at least I was able to get in with my first choice surgeon and Oncologist in the same week I was diagnosed. I am trying to look on the bright side of things. Just so Overwhelming!

Mandy

Rrobin0200

Mandy,

You're not alone. I'm so sorry you've had to Join this club. I was 37 at diagnosis. 39 now. You're in the worst part of it.. the waiting, the what if's. We've all been there so we know EXACTLY what you're going through. It sucks, no two words about it. But.. once all results come in and you have a plan of attack, it does get easier. You'll be able to feel more in control. At least, it did for me. The mastectomy part wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be. You're young and you're a fighter. You've got this. Try to keep a positive mind frame. We are behind you 100. Let us know how we can help.

Moderators

Mandyc,

These first days and weeks are so scary and overwhelming, we know. It's a lot of information to process, while still trying to get through your day-to-day life! We're glad you've joined our community, as this can be a wonderful source of support for you now and throughout your treatment and beyond. Everyone here knows what you're going through, and can relate to everything you talked about. The fear, the uncertainty, the need to keep a brave front for your family. We're all here for you, and we're with you every step of the way. As Rrobin said, it does get easier! Just take it a day at a time.

The Mods

Mandyc19

Rrobin,

Thank you, so much! It really means a lot to hear all of that. If it isn't to personal do you have numbness from your Mastectomy? I have talked with 3 different women who have had them one is numb from her neck to her navel, One said she was numb for years across her chest and upper arms and now has full feeling back. another said she is fairly numb from clavicle to just under her breast area? I didn't realize this could happen until talking with women who have had it done. Just wondering how common it is?

Mandy

moth

Mandyc - didn't you say you're having a partial mastectomy? That's the same as a lumpectomy. It's a smaller and generally less risky surgery than mastectomy. With any surgery there's a risk of of numbness - depending on how many nerves they have to cut but it makes sense that the smaller the surgery, the lower the risk.
I have no numbness following my lumpectomy.

Fritzmylove

I had a bilateral mastectomy with tissue expanders placed just 9 weeks ago, and the only place I’m numb is across the front of my breasts, and just under my armpit where they removed some nodes. I’ve already regained a small about of feeling under my arm.

It’s been almost 8 months since my dx, and I still wake up in the mornings and for a brief second think the whole thing was a dream. Then I touch.my regrowing hair and it all becomes real again. It’s true what the others have said. You’re in the worst part. Once the treatment plan is put in motion, you’ll start to wrap your head around it all.

ipenelope

Mandy~

Welcome to the site. Im pretty new here to though I've been in my fight since Sept 18. Like the other ladies said the waiting is the worst with all the what if's and uncertainty. I had a bilateral mastectomy and I surprisingly have a good amount of feeling in my chest. I can feel different areas on my breasts, above and below them. I had all of my left lymph nodes removed and have good feeling in my underarm and arm to. But everyone is different in what they get for feeling after surgery.

Thoughts and prayers with you!!💗

~Katie

Tizzy75

Wow, do I ever get where you’re coming from. I was diagnosed on April 2. Just had a mastectomy on April 26. Don’t know the full results of all my tests yet or even stage, kind, etc. I’m still waiting 🙄. That has been the worst part of this horrible roller coaster. My follow up with the surgeon is on the 8th and I’m hoping I will find out exactly what is going on so I can have a plan. I am a control freak and this is completely out of my control so coming to terms has been very difficult. The words “I have breast cancer” sound surreal. Every time I’m out and about and run into someone’s I know and they ask “hey, how’s it going” I actually have to pause and think about how to answer that. It’s not something you can’t just blurt out at the grocery store or the line up at Tim Horton’s so I feel like I am lying to myself and everyone every time I answer with “good”!

I have not researched much as I am too afraid to at this point. Once I have an actual diagnosis and know what my treatment plan is, I will seek the info from this site only as I know WebMD is ridiculous. I have learned that no two situations are identical and it’s good to hea positive stories and just tell people “I don’t want to hear that” when they get off on a tangent about someone they know.

As for the numbness from mastectomy, I am numb around the incision and in my armpit. They say this may or may not come back. I think it’s coming back a little bit but it’s only been a week so I am hopeful. I am glad for this site and I can have all the conversations with my friends and family but nobody truly knows what I am going through and the nightmare I seem to wake up from every morning only to realize it is true.

Mandyc19

Thank you all so much! Thank you for sharing all of your experiences! Tizzy the last line of your post is exactly how I feel like I am going through a nightmare and I wake up every morning to realize it is true! Yes right now I am scheduled for partial Mastectomy (lumpectomy) but am preparing for possible Mastectomy if my genetics comes back adversely, just trying to prepare my mind for the possibility. I am a huge planner and kind of a control freak and it helps me process to go through everything in detail. Goodness just the few of you responding helps so much! Thank you, Thank You, Thank you! I appreciate all the feed back so much! Everyone keeps telling me how good I am doing but I don't feel like I am doing good I feel like I am like a duck calm on the surface and going crazy underneath!

Mandy

moth

Hi Tizzy, come join us on the British Columbia forum as well - it's a good place to share info about the BCCA works and also some of us occasionally get together face to face https://community.breastcancer.org/forum/55/topics/779734?page=89#idx_2646

Rrobin0200

Mandy,

I don't have “numbness," it's just a weird sensation. Some days I can feel sensation but then other days, nothing. But I have no regrets with my mastectomy decision.

msphil

yes sweetie you have come to the right place to those of us that know exactly what your feeling what your going thru.we are here for you and I was diagnosed at 42 while planning our 2nd marriages when diagnosed.Thought my world was ending at this happy time in my life. But I made it thru with Hope I had my cry decided to fight by staying Positive. For Inspiration sweetie I am a 25yr Survivor Praise God this yr. .msphil idc stage2 0/3 nodes 3mo chemo before and after Lmast adriamycin cytoxin and 5fu. Got married and then 7wks rads and 5yrs on Tamoxifen. Hang in there and Believe you can do this.

windingshores

 You will probably have an Oncotype test done, and if the score is low, you won't have chemo and will take Tamoxifen, most likely, for 5 years.  It's hard not having full information. But the ER+ and PR+, the HER2- and the low ki67% are relatively good results.

Bookworm14

Mandy,

Sorry to see you join our ranks, but the ladies in this community are absolutely wonderful. They have so much wisdom to impart that can help you through this, and help to lift you up when you may get down.

Hearing the words “You have cancer” are definitely horrible. ...I found out I had this crap at 35 so it was a tough thing to learn, and to deal with. As many have already stated, the waiting is what is tough. Once you get the final results and have a plan of attack things get a bit easier. The surgery I had a mastectomy) was actually not as bad as I expected so I hope your lumpectomy goes just as well. Staying as positive as you can through this may help, but at the same time make sure you let out the sadness and anger when you feel it. I know that sounds weird. I wish you the best with your surgery and recovery.

MamaX7

Just diagnosed today. Was told the biopsy came back showing high grade non invasive cancer with a small amount of invasive cells. Does anyone know what this means? Just scared. I am 38 years old with four small children.

Rah2464

Mama so sorry you are joining our ranks. You are in the most difficult part of this journey, gathering all the information about what is happening so that you can decide upon a treatment plan. Your biopsy is probably indicating that you have caught this very early. You will know a lot more once you have surgical removal and evaluation of your lymph nodes. Your current pathology should also tell you whether your cancer is hormone receptive or Her2 positive. These are important pieces of information to know as well. Oh, my very best to you wish this wasn't happening, but you will be ok. Your sisters here understand how frightening this can be.

Salamandra

Hey MamaX7,

I'm sorry yours came back malignant. Of course it is scary and terrifying. I didn't feel like I could really exhale until after my first oncology appointment, when I had a plan and something that resembled a prognosis. You may have to do some paperwork/bureaucracy to get your results sent to the cancer center where you want to be treated - just call their intake office and ask. That's probably the only thing that's urgent now, so that you can get your first appointment ASAP. Not because those days/week make a difference medically, but for me it was psychologically really important/helpful.

I agree with Rah2464, it sounds like this was caught early and there is generally very good treatment and prognosis now, including for high grade, early stage. It is an emotionally and mentally challenging time, but likely not catastrophic medically - at least for the short/medium term. The way I try to look at it, that's all anybody's really got in a way anyway.

This waiting time is a good time to understand your insurance and employment medical policies and benefits. To find a therapist/psychiatrist who can support you through the process. To pamper yourself and connect to friends.