Just diagnosed

MathCampNerd

Hi everyone, I was told by reddit that this is a great resource so I figured I would post over here too. I'm a 27 year old woman and I had just recently found a lump in my armpit. I've had cysts in my breast for years but they always said it was nothing when I got them checked. I just got the biopsy done in the to cysts in my breast and the lump in my armpit. Its come back as invasive ductal carcinoma grade 2. That's all the information I could really get from my GP. Shes referred me to the cancer clinic but it's the weekend so I'm just spiraling and falling prey to doctor Google. I'm just so scared so if any one could offer me any information or any words of encouragement I would greatly appreciate it.

Moderators

Dear MathCampNerd,

Welcome to the BCO community. We are sorry about your diagnosis and glad that you reached out here for support and information from our members. This is a terrific resource for connecting with others with shared experiences. We hope some of our members will be along soon to offer their thoughts. Be sure to stay active, keep us posted and let the mods know if you need any help navigating your way around the boards. We are sending you are warmest wishes.

The Mods

CaliKelly

Hi Mathcampnerd, I just wanted to reassure you, that whatever treatments are advised for you, they are doable, not fun of course but a chore to get through, so your real life can proceed. I had the full menu of chemo, surgery radiation, more chemo, and now it's over and I'm feeling great, so try not to despair. It changes your life, but you will find a strength that you didn't know you had and do whatever you have to do! My tumor was grade 2, which means it's not overly aggressive, I believe. It would have to be a weekend! The scariest part is the beginning when you dont know what to expect! Try not to Google, cuz you dont know your stage so dont know what your plan is yet. Try not to freak out(hard) Come back to this site when you know your treatment plan you'll get lots of good advice!💕💗wishing you all the best!

ElaineTherese

Hi MathCampNerd!

It takes awhile for breast cancer patients to learn the details of their diagnosis, so your GP has probably told you all that she knows. IDC is the most common form of breast cancer; about 80% of breast cancer patients have IDC.

Breast cancer is very treatable, and there's no need to panic. This is not the time to be fixated on worst case scenarios, so staying off of Dr. Google is a good idea. Some of the data out there is old and no longer accurate.

Most of us live years and years after our diagnosis. Even breast cancer patients who've been diagnosed at an incurable stage (Stage IV) increasingly live several years after diagnosis.

I was diagnosed at Stage III with an aggressive form of breast cancer, and I'm coming up on my five year Cancerversity.

Stay hopeful and stay busy. When you know more about your cancer, this is an awesome place to discuss and debate treatment options and the like. ((Hugs))

Beaverntx

MathCampNerd, you are in the hardest part of having BC just now -- too little detail and a lot of unknowns. There is general agreement among these boards that the waiting is the hardest part. Also, be very selective with dr. Google -- Reddit sent you to one of the good sources of information, both the threads on the community and the wealth of information on the main site. There are several others but it's hard to know just what to read about for you just now. A friend of mine who is dealing with a fairly recent cancer diagnosis stated the other day that he has quit reading about his type of cancer and treatment for it because he has gotten to information overload. Try not to stress yourself with too much information which may or may not apply to you.

Hoping you get your appointment at the cancer center the soonest and can begin developing a treatment plan. I found making a list of the questions I wanted to ask was very helpful ( actually I have one now before I see my BS next month!). Finding a medical team you trust is your next step.

(((Hugs))) for you as you move forward. Please do keep in touch.

msphil

hello sweetie we are here for you and once treatment plan in place things will calm down a little the anxiety for me was crazy had to get meds. Each of us here know what your going thru for me Positive thinking along with my faith got me thru. I was planning our 2nd marriages when my underarm ached on left side then as I was in shower found the lump. Long story short was diagnosed at 42 no family history of BC had 3mo chemo before and after Lmast idc stage 2 0/3 nodes got married then 7wks rads and 5yrs on Tamoxifen. I am now this yr a 25yr Survivor Praise God. Hope kept me going and fiancee and family. You can do this. msphil

Salamandra

I'm so sorry you are facing this and so young.

Here are some things I wish people would have told me during that excruciating period between getting the malignant biopsy result and meeting my surgical oncologist:

• Everything up to and including stage III is considered early stage cancer, treatable, with good chances of getting rid of it once and for all
• Stage IV is not a death sentence any more either.
• Swollen nodes do not necessarily mean cancer. There are other causes
• Cancerous nodes do not necessarily mean advanced stage or that it has spread beyond the breast. You can have multiple cancerous nodes and still be early stage.
• Up to 2cm is considered small and is usually stage I, but depending on the genetic profile of the tumor even a much larger tumor could end up being stage I
• Most cancer that is found based on a lump, without other symptoms in other parts of the body, is early stage.
• It takes a really long time for the full picture of the cancer to emerge. Many different tests, some before and some after surgery - depending on your case. This sucks but there's not really anything to be done about it.
• For most women with cancer, it is less like a terminal illness and more like a chronic illness that requires ongoing management.
• There is so much to learn as you go through this, and it's normal to feel like you never know enough when you want to know it. Keep asking questions, trust yourself, and make sure to have doctors that you trust.

Some other things that might be helpful:

• There are resources specifically for people your age facing this. The Young Survivor Coalition may be a good place to start.
• There is financial help available for everything from copays to transportation to special bras to groceries to rent. It is some legwork (doctors notes, deadlines, applications) to get the help but it is there. Lots of organizations want to help.
• It is good to be treated or at least get a second opinion at an NCI designated Cancer Center. Getting your test results and medical records passed around shouldn't be complicated but it can require some bureaucracy wrangling. That is a great thing to have a friend or family member help with.
• Your treatment center should have a social worker and a psychiatrist that you have access to for support. If they don't offer it to you, please ask for it. The social worker for sure - they can help you with things you didn't even know you wanted help with. Applying for financial aid, finding support groups and organizations, wrangling your insurance, being a listening and supportive ear. Don't be nervous about using mental health help too. For many of us, the mental part of this game is as hard if not harder than the physical part. For the beginning of the process especially, many of us (like me) find it helpful to get a prescription for Ativan or something to help manage the anxiety. The end of active treatment is also a typical time for other kinds of blues and questions and vulnerabilities to seep in. It's really helpful to have a medical team who knows you and can give you perspective.
• Depending on your work situation, you probably have rights as far as leave. It's really important to understand if/how leave might impact your insurance. There may also be help and resources available from your state or medicaid. Researching that is something you *can* do now, or have a friend or family member do for you.
• You don't mention health insurance, so I'm assuming you're set for that. Your health insurance might have a special cancer advocate that you can use as a resource. Mine did, and sent me a very supportive letter way too late into my process to be useful! Go ahead and call now, or have someone do it with you. Cancer is so expensive to treat that insurance companies have incentive to help patients get the right diagnosis and treatment the first time. The advocate can help connect you to resources, arrange for a second opinion, etc.
• Friends your age may or may not have the life skills to be supportive of you in the way that would be most helpful. (Actually people of many ages find this, but at least the younger ones have an excuse!) Even if they don't always act like it, I'm positive that they *want* to support you. Try to have patience for those who really mean well, even if they accidentally hurt you. It's just fine to take a break from anybody who is not helping you in the moment, and it's also fine to not burn bridges, and see what the future holds for the friendship.
• I'm sure you have people in your orbit that can and do want to help, even people you might not know well. For me, I found it very helpful to be super open about my diagnosis. Support came out of everywhere for me. Friends of family, friends of friends, people who had been through it or had experience with my specific hospital and doctors recs, etc. I've had super kind encounters with neighbors I hadn't known that well, the person at the drugstore helping me pick an ointment to soothe my skin during radiation, etc.
• Your family may or may not be the best people to bring to doctors' appointments. For some people, managing their families emotional responses is its own emotional ordeal. Do your best to stay in touch with what you need for you. It is all right to bring a trusted friend instead of a family member. It is an excellent idea to bring someone. If you can't bring them in person, your doctor should be fine to let them FaceTime in. For my first round of appointments, I brought a friend in person and had another friend, who lived far and couldn't travel but had a background in medicine, FaceTime in. She muted her phone and took extensive notes on everything, and at the end was able to ask the doctor a couple of questions I wouldn't have thought to. It was really helpful to have her notes and made me feel much more comfortable just being in the moment with my doctor.
• This is a legitimately big deal, even if your prognosis is excellent. Like, if you think you'd feel better with some time off work even if technically you could go in, take it if you can afford it. If you have a friend on the other side of the country that you're not sure whether or not you should ask to come be with you, ask her.

Wow, I've written a novella here. I hope some of it is helpful either now or down the road.

TLDR; You will be ok. You can handle this. Based on how you found it, your prognosis will most likely be excellent. This is a marathon not a sprint. Take care of yourself and cut yourself a break.

Do what you can to get through this excruciating time. Ask a doctor for something for the anxiety if you think it will help. Eat cake if that's your thing, ride bicycles if that's your thing, go on a last minute beach vacation; throw yourself into your work; binge on romance novels or dumb tv shows; go visit your best friend across the country; light a candle and cry into your journal; whatever gets you through!

We are here for you.

edwards750

Lots of sage advice. Excellent post Salamandra. I luckily had someone to guide me through the process. Actually I had 2 ladies. One was a nurse/friend at St. Jude’s Children’s Hospital who had had BC and the other lady was the patient advocate assigned to me by the Women’s Health Center where I had my mammograms and biopsies. Both were so sweet about answering my never ending questions.

We don’t know what to ask when we get the news so we rely on our medical teams to fill us orger than quoting us percentages and survival rates. Typically it’s medical jargon that we don’t understand so doing our homework does help.

I have learned a lot too after the fact. Knowing beforehand could have saved me a lot of unnecessary anxiety.

A lot has changed since I was DX in 2011 and for the better.

Diane

Anonymous

So sorry, sweetie, you have to join us here--but you're going to be fine! There is a discussion board for younger women with BC. I wanted to offer that to you too, so you might find some shared community there, too. See link.

https://community.breastcancer.org/forum/27

Hugs,

Claire in AZ

MathCampNerd

Hi Everyone,

I want to thank you all for posting. I was reading them all over the weekend and before I had my appointment. You all helped me so much I cant even tell you. I saw my oncologist and he believes its only stage 2 but is doing a heart scan, bone scan, and CT scan to be sure. I start chemo next week for 3 rounds and then hopefully surgery and then another 3 rounds of chemo to be safe. He seems really hopeful and I am too. I'm so thankful I found this community because I'm definitely going to need the support. I just wanted to thank you all again so much.