Would you build or not?

illimae

My husband built us a cabin that we plan to relocate to this year, however, the plan had always been to build a small home near it to live in permanently. Then I got cancer, not just cancer but straight to stage IV. Initially, I stopped planning anything because I thought I’d be dead but I’m not and even with brain mets, I am stable and feel good.

So here’s the dilemma, the cabin is two story with stairs to the deck and the 2nd floor. This concerns me should my husband or I have mobility problems in the future but building a small single story home that I had planned comes with many what if’s. What if I die before it’s finished? What if it’s a waste of money?

Would you be cautious or go for it?

Marchz

build it! Don’t stop believing

Flynn

I’d be inclined to go for it as long as I stillhad a financial cushion to deal with more medical expenses. I assume modifying the cabin to make it your one and done home is not feasible?

edwards750

Go for it. Life is too short whether you have BC or not.

Diane

Meow13

You can always get an acorn stair lift. Our family friends stayed in their split level well into their 90s.

AliceBastable

Go for it. Maybe modify room arrangements so a downstairs room could be a bedroom? There's no law that says you have to use any room for a particular purpose, especially if there's no plumbing in it. My in-laws slept in what was supposed to be a dining room for decades.

Lots of Stage IV people who are 10 + year survivors. Don't let the cancer dictate who you are. ❤

illimae

Thanks everyone!

Flynn, the build would be fairly low cost and we’d do much of it ourselves with some of the profit from selling our current home but it does make me think about medical expenses.

Meow, I hadn’t considered the stair lift, it would solve one issue but the other is that the cabin was never meant to be the home and I’d be settling.

sherry35

Go for your dreams! Don't settle! This disease takes so much from us already so if you have the ability to make some dreams come true than I say do it!

Cheers

kksmom3

Don't settle! My SIL has been stage 4 for 22 years and is stable!

illimae

Wow, 22 years is amazing!

Thanks everyone

ShetlandPony

I would ask myself how the building process would likely affect my current quality of life. I choose to live in the present as much as possible and not sacrifice too much for an uncertain future. So, if building will mean a lot of stress, a drain on my energy, time, and money, I would choose to just get an elevator. But if building will be a fun and energizing project, if the process and not just the product brings joy, then I would build.

Parrynd1

Well you can sit and say what if I can’t, but like you said Mae...you are still here and feeling pretty ok so what if you live! Live while you have the breathe to. You could plan for it to accommodate some disability, but if need be DH can sell it in the future and maybe make some money seeing as how you are saving some in your building plans. For me I’m learning cancer, stage 4 even, doesn’t mean stop planning or dreaming it just means you do then different and probably more cautious. We would love to move to Houston and get out of the shoebox we live in. I know I won’t live too long, but I’d like to not die where I am so trying to figure out how to do that for us is worth it. Only you can say what’s worth it. Maybe it’s not a cabin anymore, it can be something else, it can be what you already have...what’s worth it to you even if it fails or doesn’t go as planned?