Dcis and goldilocks mastectomy

Jadedjo

Hello all.

I think I might have posted in here before maybe not.

Right now all I know is I have a ductal carcinoma. It will be Thursday before I can get a better explanation then that and prob not by much. I am morbidly obese right now (this has actually sent me down the path to change that so I can reduce my risk of all the cancer ghosts haunting me) and am peeking over the edge of full blown diabetes with fluctuating blood pressure.

I am about to be 44.

Anybody who has read my thread knows I want to avoid certain harsher treatments for a variety of reasons but I'm asking this question  for another reason.

Even if it's super early stages ( and my gut says it's probably more) I want a BMX. It doesn't matter what my receptors are. Too me getting rid of the things that made life difficult (cause I also have cysts)since I developed them at age 10 is the only thing to do to reduce my risk.the risk is still there I know that but i feel it would be less if I didn't have breasts then if I did.the only thing they have been good for is an arm rest for when I hold my iphone or book. I can buy a pillow for that.

in every other way they have made my life miserable including now trying to kill me.please don't tell me to wait for the the treatment diagnosis. It really doesn't matter to me if I'm still in dcis or further. I know the risks of the surgery. I know the recovery time. Although from what I have read for most it's less then those who reconstruct immediately. That's another selling point for me.

 Cancer is going to kill me.between family genetics,health issues that increase risks , my age at first diagnosis of BC. I got too many swords of cancer hanging over my head.

.I'm going to end up in the chemo chair eventually it's a matter of when not if and I want to avoid it as long as possible. If I beat this round I figure I got maybe 5 years  if I'm lucky before I get the next diagnosis of something.hopefully they will run genetics tests to find out what is more likely.i didn't think breast cancer was likely but here I am.

But that's neither here nor there.

I've already crossed TE's and implants  off the list because I suspect I would hate the way it looks and feels on me and I already know the recovery is longer then those with no recon even without complications and at my size and weight there would be .i probably don't qualify for any of the flaps due to my weight and health issues. Same thing with recovery. 

I found a site that talked about the the goldilocks method. I already know that  the tissue could be reabsorbed as an unexpected complicstion.I been reading the threads 

.im large chested I wear sports bras cause I hate actual bras and don't know my actual size but I'm guessing a large D or DD. I'm perfectly ok with being an A or small B. I just want little bumps.

Before I found the link I was thinking of going flat.i have a Buddha belly that's already pretty obvious so I'm hoping little bumps might offset that while I try my best to reduce it with diet and exercise.I'm still open to recon of another nature later on down the road if I can get myself healthier physically and mentally..and don't end up back in the oncologists office.

Has anyone here gotten a goldilocks mastectomy?  Would you be able to share your experience especially if you've had it awhile?

When I think of lumpectomy  which if my gp is right will probably be suggested if it's still dcis.I feel anxious. Like it's not the right decision but when I think of going the bmx route with either goldilocks or options for a later reconstruction I feel a sort of calm.

Am I going to have body issues?absolutely! I been attached to the darn things,sometimes reluctantly since I was 10. But I already have massive body issues there's a reason I haven't looked at myself naked in a mirror for years. so what's one more.

Am  I going to regret losing them?not as much as I regret them trying to kill me.

I have spent the last three days knowing I'm going to lose a breast even if I chose lumpectomy the tumor is deep so it's going to be noticeable. That would upset me more then losing both of them.the gouge.then the constant fear that well you still have boobs are they going to try again or will you be one of the lucky ones.

I always have wanted a breast reduction ever since I had to wear a cross my heart bra a year before I even got my first cycle because I was already a full B at 11.i was pushing heavy C by 13.

 I've decided to look at this as the ULTIMATE breast reduction.

I just want to know if goldilocks works and lasts? 

I don't even know if anyone is going to answer this thread I'm mostly looking for the most information I can find so when I go to the breast surgeon and he says lumpectomy i can say no and confidently say why not and then ask if he would be open to this procedure.

Thank you.

Blessed be.

ETA: should have picked a different title. I also wanted to ask those who went the bmx route for a dcis diagnosis how they came to their decision.