my first post here.

Anonymous

my first post here.

Someguy-55

First of all, let me start by saying, I am new here, and these forums have been extremely helpful for me. I would also like to extend my love to everyone of you who are enduring treatment related to TNBC.

My girlfriend who I am in love with was diagnosed with breast cancer (1A - according to her) in November of 2017. She immediately started Tomoxifen and was referred to surgery (not sure why). After some time went by, she switched to a very good Oncologist. He recommended four rounds of Xeloda before surgery. My gf kept details from me and stayed very quiet about mostly everything. The only thing she offered me is that it is now 2.5 cm and non-estrogen. She said that it has not effected any lymphnodes. I am assuming with it being 2.5 cm, it is stage 2? She finally admitted it was triple negative.

I am finally understanding more and more. I always asked her about the chemo and why and she said "to shrink it before surgery, due to it being in a critical area." I looked up Xeloda and wondered why Xeloda due to the nature and reason for that medicine. She would only tell me because all treatment plans are different. I understand that Xeloda is the approach because they want to zap any stray cells that have left the breast. I feared for a long time that it was spreading in her due to the treatment type. She has told me it has not. I have felt a very suspicious lump in her side that she said is just a "fatty tissue and benign."

She is struggling to get through her fourth round of chemo and wants to quit. She is normally 100 pounds healthy and is somewhere between 85-90 pounds now. We haven't seen each other in approximately four weeks because she has been sick. I think it is critical that she continues the treatment to eliminate the chance of re-occurrence. I am assuming the likelihood of re-occurrence is the same across the board despite the stage, due to it being TNBC?

I just want to breathe and rest my mind. I am a busy father who works a stressful job. I just want to know things aren't as bad I think they are based on what I read on the internet. Any advice?

Georgia1

Hi there Someguy, and thanks for worrying about and supporting your girlfriend. Yes, if it is 2.5 cm that would normally mean it is stage 2. "Triple negative" breast cancer is harder to treat, but it sounds like she's in the hands of a good oncologist now and getting the right treatment. You're right that she should stick with it, but my guess is that the main goal right now is to shrink the tumor and that she will still need surgery once she is stronger. But that is only a guess. Is it possible that she already had the tumor surgically removed and didn't tell you?

If she is triple negative I don't know why she would have been on Tamoxifen, but that really doesn't matter now.

And in any event - absolutely -- I can assure you that things are never as bad as the scary stuff that Google and the internet churn up. The fact that no lymph nodes are involved is very good news. And it seems likely that the second lump has been thoroughly checked out and is benign.

Hopefully someone smarter than me will come along soon to offer their perspective.

kmajor

Hi Someguy,

I’m also TN and my tumor was 2.8 cm and I was stage 2b. TN is very aggressive but normally responds really well to chemo. Please don’t let the internet scare you...google is not your friend. When I first started treatment I started out with 4 cycles of AC and then weekly Taxol for 12 weeks. My tumor shrunk a great deal from the chemo. Next I had surgery a lumpectomy. Even though my surgeon got clear margins and took out the remainder of the tumor my oncologist still has me doing Xeloda for 8 rounds. I will finish those next month and then I will go through radiation.

Someguy-55

Thank you for the responses. I believe she was on Tamoxifen because it was misdiagnosed. Once they figured out it was triple negative a different approach was made by a different oncologist. I understand more about TN the more I read these forums, especially from women in the same category. I also appreciate hearing the experiences. So far surgery has not occurred and allegedly no lymph nodes were effected. I believe she also keeps information from me to keep me from worrying.

Thank you.

moth

I think my gentle suggestion is that you go to counselling. First go alone, at least a couple times.

And then if she will come with you, to a couples session. She is locking you out & that is very painful but also, you have to respect her boundaries and what she wants to tell you about her disease and her prognosis.

If you want to look at 5-15 year overall population stats for people with breast cancer, you can try one of the calculators. You might not have enough information about the tumor to enter so you'll have to guesstimate. (& note - the two calculators ask for different units, so pay attn to cm versus mm)

http://www.predict.nhs.uk/predict_v2.1/tool

http://www.lifemath.net/cancer/breastcancer/therap...