Regrets

ClaireFraser

I had DCIS, a left MX with reconstruction and a lift on my right breast. I don't think I ever fully grieved over the loss, and I hate my implants. I have been on Tamoxifen for almost four years. I'm having hot flashes and mood swings. I regret not choosing a lumpectomy/radiation. This regret is taking over my thoughts. If I could do it all over again...

vampeyes

Hi Claire,

I am sorry you are feeling this way. I had lumoectomy, but wanted mastectomy. I didn't want those needles ever again- 4 of them injecting something into my areola! I too am on tamoxifen and hate it! It's only been 6 weeks, the side effects are awful.

I know you can't change what is done, but if you hate the implants maybe remove them?

{ Hugs }

mustlovepoodles

I'm so sorry, Claire. This disease is such a beast. We all make the best decisions we can with the resources at hand. It's doubly painful when we come to regret those decisions.

Please be kind to yourself. You've been through a terrible ordeal and had to make some terrible choices with terrible consequences. I have also been unhappy with my recovery. It's pretty common for us to experience post-traumatic stress after treatment has ended. Perhaps you can talk this out with a therapist. Sometimes medication can help, as well.

Let us know how things go.