OK. Officially freaking out.

SwedishFish

Hi everyone. I’ve been lurking this forum for a week now and have so appreciated reading everyone’s experiences.

I’m 33 years old and at the beginning of February started having a pain in the 10:00 position of my left breast. It was like a bruise, at first only hurt if I happen to press on it. I could not feel a lump in that area. After no changes through two menstrual cycles I decided to have it looked at.

Well on Friday I had a Gyno look at it and she said that she *did* feel a nodule there and I’m having a ultrasound and mammogram this Friday.

Well I’m admittedly a very anxious person and medical things *really* freak me out. I have had a couple of full blown panic attacks the last couple of days. Of course now everything is hurting - I’m having shoulder pain, last night my collarbone on the same side as the lump was hurting really bad and today I have tingling in my fingers.

I *think* the shoulder pain etc is from me stepping wrong on Friday and kind of putting my lower back out, but who knows.

My kids are only 3 and 6 and I’m terrified of a worst case diagnosis.

How do you guys keep calm until you have facts?

chronicpain

Tranquilizers (clonazpam, ativan, xanax) and a warm bath with self-hypnosis relaxing thought

Hope it is nothing, but verify

moth

hard sweaty exercise, dancing, engaging books and tv shows, meditation (free guided meditation here if you want to check it out https://www.tarabrach.com/guided-meditations/ )

If your anxiety and panic attacks are affecting your life I'd strongly suggest a course of cognitive behavioral therapy from a skilled psychologist. CBT takes about 12 sessions and is concrete helpful lifelong skills. You may also need medication from your physician.

There's no need to suffer from health anxiety - get it treated. This will give you something concrete you can do right now

best wishes for benign results - the odds are definitely on your side!

SwedishFish

Thanks guys - I absolutely agree I need to do a few things about my health anxiety.

I left a message for my Dr. regarding the bone concerns and panic attacks. I guess we will see if she includes the collarbone in the imaging Friday (not even sure if that’s possible)

In the meantime I’m going to do my best to distract myself.

Jennvo

Something that helped me throughout the process of diagnosis was to not look too far into the future and just focus on the now. I've been a worrier all my life, so that piece of advice has helped me in lots of areas.

KBeee

SwedishFish, Schedule something fun every day this week as a reward for getting through the day of waiting. Waiting is HARD. Also keep a journal. Getting those thoughts out can be very helpful. Last, I'd say to assume the best until proven otherwise. I know that's hard. You need to self-talk that to yourself over nad over. Keep us posted.

SwedishFish

Jenvo: That is a really good mantra to try and live by, I certainly need to remind myself to quit focusing on things that haven't even happened yet! I tried a trial of Simple Habit (mediation app) a while back and really liked it, I might sign up as they have a lot of mindfulness sessions on things like this.

Kbee: Great idea! I see a lot of Lush bath bombs in my future