How do I not go crazy with worry?

Anonymous

How do I not go crazy with worry?

XenaGee

Hi there. I want to preface this by saying I go to college across the country from my resident state and I have no insurance here, so my options for seeing a doctor are extremely limited. So before my last period, I found a lump in my left breast closer to my armpit than my nipple and I panicked immediately. I go to college across the country from my resident state and I have no insurance here, so my options for seeing a doctor are extremely limited. I went to Planned Parenthood as they were basically the only place willing to see me without insurance (they were very nice) and they told me it felt like it was probably just denser breast tissue and it would more than likely go away before my next period. I'm now 10 days out from my next one and it still is there. My breast also hurts, but honestly I've always had sensitive breasts and I used to be an athlete so the shoulder problems I have on that side have often radiated outward, so I'm not even sure what to be worried about anymore. I've read all the internet forums (yes, I know, bad idea to fall into that hole but I just can't seem to stop) and I'm just still really worried. I barely understand what they all mean by "defined shape" and "mobility of the mass" just because I have nothing really to compare it to. I'm going home in a few weeks for spring break and I have an appointment for an ultrasound then, but I don't know how I'm going to make it through these two weeks without losing my mind. I know the PP doctor didn't seem worried, and wasn't even going to recommend me for an ultrasound until she found out I have anxiety. Since finding this it's manifested itself in the form of health anxiety that leaves me in tears more often than not. I don't feel like I can talk to my friends about it here at school because we're all so young this is barely on any of their minds and I feel like they think I'm being overly dramatic, but if I don't talk to someone I fall into a state where even if I'm with people it's very obvious something is wrong with me as I run over all the statistics and numbers in my favor in my head and refuse to speak. I almost want to go back to Planned Parenthood, but it feels like that would be the very definition of crazy, especially as it wouldn't do anything but either have them say the same thing as last time or tell me, yes they'd like to look further into it but still leave me with a two week waiting period as I can't get imaging done without insurance. I'm only 20 and I know I have that on my side, but nothing is impossible, and I have a grandmother who is currently dying from terminal breast cancer. I'm just really worried and I'm already shirking school responsibilities because it's so completely taking over my mind. I don't know what to do. I want to believe my previous PP appointment, but I just can't believe her unless I get concrete evidence. If anyone has any thoughts, I could really use some suggestions.

Fembot

XenaGee,

You've come to the right place. The largest percentage of breast lumps end up being nothing, yet if you found one that wasn't there before it's smart to have it checked out. Breasts change a lot every period and throughout life and most of theses variances are normal.

It's easy to worry when waiting for answers, but remember that you are in control. You made the appointment, and it's looked after for now. Done.

MelissaDallas

Are you being treated for your anxiety? It is a truly miserable way to live and when it is interfering with your life to the point it is preventing you from doing the things you need to do, like school, and crying all the time you need help with it.

We will all tell you pretty much what Planned Parenthood. At twenty the statistics that you have anything other than a benign or normal hormonal condition are virtually zero

XenaGee

Thank you for your reply! I'm trying my best to remember I've done all I can do for the moment, I think the hardest part is just not feeling like I've got anyone to fall back on. It never hurts to hear I've made the right choices thus far so thank you!

XenaGee

Hi! I got put on medication for anxiety back in January, but due to it being prescribed in an Urgent Care appointment I'm not allowed to get it refilled. I also tried my school counselors but they were less than helpful, so I'm kind of stuck where I'm at with that.

Thank you for your assurances. They help to calm me down a little1

mustlovepoodles

At age 20, your risk of breast cancer is EXTREMELY low, nigh zero. I'm sorry that your grandmother has terminal breast cancer--that's got to make everything feel worse. But it doesnt necessarily translate to greater risk for you. Most women are diagnosed over the age of 50, after menopause.

I'm glad you're having this checked out, but try not to Google too much. Everything "breast" leads to "breast cancer." So much of what's on the internet is inaccurate and scare-mongering. And virtually none of it applies to women 20 years old. This is faaaarrr more likely to be caused by benign cysts, infection, or inflamnation than breast cancer.

djmammo

XenaGee

"I go to college across the country from my resident state and I have no insurance here"

Is you health insurance only valid in your home state? Is there a college infirmary?

XenaGee

Hello! Yeah, my family recently switched insurance to one that only works in my home state. I went to the college doctors office, but since I go to school in such a small town it's the doctor for the entire town and so the next available appointment is at the end of April.

XenaGee

Haha, yeah I've noticed there seems to be no middle ground with Google. I'm more worried because I know there is that possibility, but even the stuff designed to be helpful is almost anything but.

Thank you for your sympathy about my grandmother. It is making this whole thing scarier, yeah.