Sex after mastectomy, menopause and no libido

Grammie1987

I’m 67yrs old and have been married for 33yrs. Our sex live was always phenomenal. It was the norm to have multiple orgasms. Then things started falling apart. First it was menopause. I tried treating the vaginal dryness with estrogen creams and they all gave me blander infections. Now we hope for the best with KY Jelly. Then I was diagnosed bi-polar and the cocktail of drugs has sucked any desire I had right out of me. It’s not a choice I have to go off them either. Lastly, I was diagnosed with BC and had a bi-lateral mastectomy with reconstruction. So, now I have dry vagina, no breasts, struggle to have one orgasm and could completely care less if I never have sex again. I feel like just a body existing to do everyday tasks. My husband has been more than patient and caring throughout all this but I know it’s been very hard on him. I want to want sex, but I don’t even know where to start. All erogenous zones are dead. I’ve read forums, seen my dr and had therapy. Nothing works. Has anyone else had this problem?What did you do? Or is all this my new norm?

Luckynumber47

There's a lot of laughing and silliness that goes on in our bedroom now-a-days. It's hard to be serious when nothing works right (for either of us) anymore. Plus I have a warped sense of humor. This is probably tmi: I have nipple tattoos where the originals used to be and I had a rub on tattoo left over so I added that in the middle. I mean, come on, what guy wouldn't like a lady with 3? I once put my bra (with prosthetics) on backwards because DH thought women should have boobs on the back to hold onto when slow dancing. There you go dear, dream come true.

We have a whole ceremony for inserting the coconut oil every night, and he's scored on how warm his fingers are.

My libido look a hike at menopause but sex is still important to DH so I play along. Plus I like all the cuddling. (And a really good vibrator doesn't hurt.)

Just find out what you like and what he likes and come up with a new way to approach sex