My Husband, My Life, My Love, My Family, My Cancer

Micmel

Oh Mara~. I'm wrapping you in a great big hug. I am sending thoughts and good wishes your way. I hope your brother can help. You should move in with them and help them with the bills. (In a perfec world) Just wish there was something we all could do to help each other. My son has been looking for a place for months. Everything has sky rocketed since covid hit. Everything is out of price ranges for these young folks and us on budgets and being sick. It's really a problem only getting worse. Something has to change. Who really could afford $1600 a month for a one bedroom. ???? No one person I know at my sons age or myself being on disability as I am. How are we all supposed to make it ? Happy Birthday sweetheart 🎁

Chicagoan

Happy Birthday, Mara! I hope this day has some pleasant surprises to make up for yesterday. I think your plan to consult with a social worker at the cancer center is an excellent one. You may also be eligible for other forms of support-you should definitely take advantage of whatever benefits to which you are entitled.

Kittycat-Sorry to hear about your progression. Hope that the Halavan kicks ass on the cancer and leaves you feeling good.

illimae

Kitty, I’m sorry to hear about the progression but hoping that the change of treatment knocks it back and is well tolerated.

Mara, Happy Birthday 🎉

candy-678

Good grief to all. So much to take in.

Kitty- So sorry for your progression news. My prayers to you. Your profile info is limited on the treatments you have had. Can they do any oral treatments on you or are you limited to the IV chemos now? Some on BCO post about revisiting previous treatments--- Ibrance, AI's, etc.

Mara- I am so sorry you are going thru all this. Hopefully the social workers can help. And also, maybe your brother. When you posted that the emails have no letterhead, and just wants you to transfer money. It sounds off. You do not have any contact info for the current company/landlord so you can ask them if they were bought out and by whom? Question your current landlord? Seems like a scam. I know you probably don't have the funds, but maybe hire an attorney?

And, I know this may not sound right, but HAPPY BIRTHDAY MARA !!!!

Kittykat9876

A great big happy birthday Mara, as the others have said, put your worries away for tonight and enjoy your special day, 🎂🍾🍸

Katyblu

Kittykat, I’m so sorry about your progression. I hope the new treatment treats you well and kicks those mets to the curb!

Mara, happy happy birthday! I hope you can take some time today to celebrate yourself! 🎂🎉

Sending hugs to everyone! We’ll get through all this together.

Micmel

Kitty~I’m sorry that is what they decided. I hope the new sides effects won’t be bad. I hope they aren’t even there. Sending best wishes.. hoping it will be effective!

mara51506

Thank you Mel. I have kept busy with my surveys etc. Just finished No Time To Die. It was good.

Yes, Chris and Kelly are coming tonight. We will see what they think.

I appreciate everyone here for such kindness.

Sunshine99

Mara, I'm wishing you a happy birthday and still hoping for a good outcome to your housing "situation" (I couldn't find the right adjective for it) and that if you do have to move, it will be to someplace better.

Kitty, I'm sorry about your progression. I hope what ever treatment you and they choose is effective and with minimal SEs.

Hugs and kisses (I'm partial to the Hershey's Holiday Kisses - Candy Cane) to all. I'm not a huge fan of white chocolate, but I do love peppermint bark and found the candy cane kisses on Amazon. Just bought 2-4.45 bags (don't judge). I don't eat a ton of them, maybe just 2-4 a day, but WHAT IF I RUN OUT OF THEM??? I now have a good supply if anyone needs some.

Carol

mara51506

Sunshine, although I did not sleep, I am feeling more peaceful. Not really accepting but sort of knowing I will need to figure somethings out. I honestly forgot about my birthday as I phoned the hospital about requesting a social worker but the cancer clinic is closed due to Remembrance Day here. My goodness. I am 50 now, does not feel different than 49 but is sure weird when filling out my age when doing a survey. Oh well, did not even imagine 50 when I was first dx'd almost 7 years ago. Physically I have been more than lucky to have had mostly strong years. I do appreciate things like that if I am honest. My mind was black yesterday but have been breathing the 4-7-8 way as soon as thoughts begin, finished No Time To Die, I highly recommend it. Kept myself busy with my general busywork around the house as well. Overall, feeling a bit better and will do my best tomorrow.

Katyblu

Sunshine, no judgement here! Las year I bought a case of the dark chocolate and mint Kit Kats because I thought they were limited edition and WHAT HAPPENS IF I RUN OUT?!?! Thankfully, I have not…

LivingIVlife

Kitty- I'm so sorry to hear of your progression. May the treatment be kind and kick the cancer to the curb!

Mara - Happy Birthday girl! You are just a young chick compared to me. Keep good thoughts only and enjoy your day.

Yes today is Remembrance Day here. "In Flanders Field where poppies grow" "Lest we not forget "

I also use this Day not only to remember the brave souls that fought for our freedom but to remember the brave souls that fought this relentless disease. May one day soon our freedom will be won with a cure.

Everyone is in my thoughts. Mae good luck tomorrow.

mara51506

Living4Life, I feel silly. For some reason, not reading your location right, I had you from California with the CA, did not dawn on me that it meant PEI Canada. Yes, I did observe the moment of silence at 11:00 am here. I totally agree about the people battling this disease, patients, families, elders and all the wonderful healthcare, police, firemen and others who run toward t he dangers including this disease.

moth

Happy Birthday Mara! Enjoy a wonderful day and wishing you health, peace of mind and many more years ahead! 🎉🎉🎈🎉🎉

Elderberry

mara:

I hope today is a good day for you. I hope things work out well with the cancer clinic, a social worker.......maybe Legal Aid. I hope you find a place that is better than your current digs and isn't costing you a whole lot more and you can thumb your nose at the f'ing new owners. Cyber Hugs

As for "Am I that old" When I filled out my flu form I wrote in the box for age - 71 How can that be?

So - Happy Birthday to you, Kid

santabarbarian

Mara happy birthday!! -- I am boiling on your behalf re apartment.

1. In USA we have "legal aid" and "housing authority" both of which could potentially help you know the laws that apply to you.

2. I can imagine a journalist might be interested in anyone evicting a cancer patient during the holidays

3. If the owner of this building owns other buildings they might be able to relocate you and eat the difference in rent?

KBL

Mara, happy birthday! I’m sorry for your predicament. I can’t even imagine what you’re going through. You are in my thoughts. Hugs

mara51506

Thank you everyone for the birthday wishes, they are appreciated, still having trouble remembering to write 50 when putting down my age, guess it will catch up.

I had not even thought getting a journalist, I will run it by my brother when he comes tonight to see what he thinks, apparently he has more information. We do have a tribunal and I have specific questions I will expect to be answered when the property manager comes over tomorrow. I want to know where my notification that they want us out is, only got a tornup piece of paper. That is not notice of any sore. No contact info either. They want the rent paid through interac e transfer. So many questions, no decidsions, should be interesting.

Elderberry

mara: I hope you can come up with a good strategy. I bristle when asked for e-transfers. I'm doing it for the contractor remodelling the kitchen but otherwise...................I mean, really, what if you didn't have a computer to do on-line banking? And notice? What notice? I would have been a decent thing to do for the current owners to alert you, rather than blind-siding you. It may have given you more time to make arrangements.

50sgirl

Mara, What a horrible thing to have happen. I wish I could be there to give you a big hug and try to help you through all this. Don’t ever think that your problems or issues are less important or less severe than anyone else’s. You are well-loved here, and people care about what is happening to you. You are experiencing a life-altering development right now, and anyone would be nervous and upset under the same circumstances. Lean on others, whoever can assist you in anyway. The social worker is definitely a good place to start. She should have resources available to help. Your brother, of course, will also want to help. Please let us know about developments.

Hugs and prayers from, lynn

Iwrite

Happy Birthday Mara! 50 is young. Enjoy your day ! Do not let them intimidate you. If a bad tenant can stay for six months after a notification, then a good tenant should have at least a year before moving. They can begin renovations on a different unit!! It does sound fishy. I'd say hire a lawyer,but unfortunately they are $. The social worker and your brothers will be a big help.

Illimae- Hope tomorrow goes great! Super MRI news

Kittykat- This could be the drug that stops the progression and gets you back to NED! It still sucks to get this news…hang in there!!!

Mel- My mouth sores on 75 mg are usually mild…I think the last blow up was stress and spicy food making it worse. Hope they are going away for you!!

mara51506

Alright, Chris and Kelly just left. Some interesting information. Apparently, the new owners need to have a permit to renovate this unit before forcing me out. They also have to give 120 days notice before telling me to leave. They are legally required to pay me three months of rent as well. I would also get a refund of my last month. I am going to start looking around for a new place and my brother called the fellow who came to see me yesterday and told him to go through him for any communication going forward. I told Kelly that I want to get a slightly bigger place with all utilities included and bigger than this one. I want a larger place as well with a real kitchen and room for storage, a desk etc. Might as well embrace the change.

I should mention that although my disability pay is low, I do still have some funds in the bank from the house sale. I can stretch a dollar like nobody's business too. They also brought chocolate cake so that was good. I will have time to find a new place, have enough to tide myself over hopefully a while and maybe find a place closer to the hospital.

Micmel

Mara~ sounds better this time around. I’m glad you got more details and have more of an idea of what you’re dealing with.

Lynne ~💜💐 always a pleasure. To see you here. Hope you’re doing well.

I write ~ I am thinking I may be headed to 75 mg real soon it’s. Just my darn tongue won’t stop burning. Never experienced anything like it. Never stops. Drives you nuts! I’m going to mention the lower doseage. I was on 100 mg until 10 days ago when my break began. Today at first it felt like it was easing up , by the end of the day it was miserable again. So. I guess I’ll just have to wait it out. It’s always something.

We struggle so much in life in general. Why throw cancer at us all. Life is hard enough without a terminal disease. Yeah just what I needed. !

mara51506

Oh Mel, I am sorry the tongue is starting up again for you, all I want to hear is that it is healing up for you.

Mae, I am happy the MRI results were good.

Kikomoon

Happy Birthday Mara! Thinking of you!

SeeQ

Mara - Happy Birthday! And a major milestone at that! You are not clogging up this thread and your situation is very trying, to say the least. It's there any chance your DB could find something with in-law quarters? Everyone would have their own space and be affordable, and you would have support later when you need it. I hope the social worker can help you sort things out. Hugs.

illimae

I’m leaving for the hospital now with pockets full of friends and snacks. I’ll update this afternoon, have a good day!

cowgal

Mae - I'm bringing milkshakes from Braum's for pocket duty. Posthat gamma knife destroys the cancer.

cowgal

That last post should say “positive thoughts that…”. Not sure why it didn’t post correctly but no matter how many times I tried to edit, it would screw its up again.

candy-678

Mae- Pocket duty with cinnamon rolls with lots of icing.

Mara- That sounds like you got more information. I like SeeQ's idea of an area for family for later when you need them, but yet privacy for you now. Hoping the house/apartment hunting goes well for you. More room and close to stores and hospital for you. I can pinch a penny till it yells too.

Mel- Are they sure it is Ibrance related? With no sores and the burning. Could it be something else? Had your dentist check into it maybe? Then Yes go down to 75mg. They say the lowered dose is still effective--- I was on 75mg almost all my 4 years on Ibrance. It did well for me, to get 4 years out of it.

Well, my Palliative Care team highly advised me to get my affairs in order--- POA, Will, etc. Last appointment I had with them the subject came up. I do not have a POA. I have a Will but it is 11 years old and 2 family members have died and I got cancer in that time. So it needs to be updated. The Palliative care doc and Social Worker both said it is "Urgent"- their words. I said maybe after my next scans to see if I am progressing or stable. They said not to wait. Kind of freaked me out. I jokingly (but yet not) said to the Social Worker "do you know something I don't". He said No just that I need to get things done.

So yesterday I met with my attorney. We discussed things. Now I need to have a serious discussion with my sister. As she is the only family member I have left that could fill the need to be the go-to person= my POA and Executor of my Will. She has said in the past she does not want to do this. But I have no one else. I am going to talk with her tomorrow.