Only two things to worry about...

SheliaMarie

I feel like I'm on some never ending journey of only 2 things to worry about. I found a swollen lymph node. That's okay, there's only 2 things to worry about.. is it infection? Or is it cancer? If it's infection, then there's nothing to worry about (there's antibiotics). If it's cancer there's only 2 things to worry about... is it a new cancer or a recurrence? If it's a new cancer, no worries (lots of treatments available). If it's a recurrence, there's only 2 things to worry about. Is it a single node or more extensive mets? If it's a single lymph node, nothing to worry about (pretty easy to treat). If there's moremets, only 2 things to worry about...

Finally, I get to travel the lesser of two evil roads... until... oral chemo. Sounds good. Only 2 things to worry about... is my EKG normal or abnormal? If it's normal, treatment begins! Yay! If it's abnormal, only 2 things to worry about... am I candidate for this chemo? Or no? So today I go to take ANOTHER test to determine if my treatment plan will proceed.

Obviously my faith has been shaken, my emotions are spiraling downward, and I'm beginning to feel hopeless.

KBeee

Often nodes swell for something other than infection or mets. Sometimes it is somethings as simple as an ingrown hair. Hoping the node swelling resolves

Emily2008

Hoping you were able to get some answers at your appointment today.

Praying that the train can stop at the easier of the 2 things to worry about, i.e. a node that's swollen for any other reason than cancer.

Please keep us posted!

SheliaMarie

Thanks, Emily. I didn't make it clear, but the swelling was confirmed to be cancer. All of those "2 things" have already been faced by me in the last few weeks. It was cancer, recurrence, and has metastasized to numerous lymph nodes (cervical, supraclavicular, subclavicular, subpectoral and axillary) along with a meton my spine. I was just feeling really sorry for myself earlier when I posted.

dlb823

Swess, I'm so sorry about your re-dx, but I'm glad you've found BCO. Hopefully, whatever drug regimen they put you on will work wonders on those various metastatic areas very quickly.

The one question I have... Is your bc TNBC? If not, I'm wondering why oral chemo (maybe Xeloda?) is being suggested to you as a first line treatment. I happen to be on Xeloda now, but I got 3-1/2 very stable years out of two hormonal regimens (Anastrozole; then Faslodex+Ibrance), before going to oral chemo. So just wondering if you are not ER+, or why your onc is suggesting chemo -- even an oral chemo -- as a first line tx.

Hugs, and hang in there. A metastatic dx is always a huge shock, but it does get easier once you realize that mets can be treated and controlled for a very long time -- hopefully until there are more breakthroughs and even better treatments. Deanna

SheliaMarie

You know, I may be confused. Maybe it's not an oral chemo?? It's called kasqali and it's to be used along with an AI - in my case aromasin. My head is still spinning right now.

dlb823

That makes more sense. Kisquaii (ribociclib) is the newest CDK4/6 inhibitor. Ibrance/palbociclib was the first. I'm not up on which A/I they used in the Kisquali trials, but I'm sure your onc is, and that type of combo (a CDK4/6 inhibitor + an A/I) is much more frequently used as a first line tx. And as far as it being an "oral chemo" -- technically, it isn't because it just blocks one pathway vs. killing all fast-growing cells. However, the bottle probably come with chemo handling labels, and there are some SEs, such as fatigue, so it can be chemo-like in those ways.

And we all get the head spinning. It's totally normal at this point.

Let us know if you have any other questions or concerns. You can probably search (to left) for Kisquali or ribociclib to find threads with other women here on it. If not, you may want to start a new topic to gather first-hand input and support!

pajim

Swess, hang in there! It's totally normal to be confused and scared and all sorts of bad things. We call it the "shock and awe" period. Once you start the meds, discover that they're not bad (and they're not), and the tumors respond to them, life will get better.

In the meantime if you feel that you're spiralling into depression ask your doc for help.

7of9

Swess, it is complete crap when we have a string, sometimes endless of worst case scenario results when we try so hard for the better result. I feel like I just jinxed myself setting up an appointment with plastic surgeon three weeks before my next ck ups and scans. They said if nothing shows up, they won't scan me for two years. Two years!!! Then last week I noticed left swollen, sore node under jaw. Right out of the zone where they radiated last year. Claritin or chemo? Neither tonight...Ambien AND Attivan. Screw this shit.