Please help

Sciteachmama

just received diagnosis of grade 3 invasive ductal carcinoma. I am 39 and have a 3 year old and 9 month twins. I see a surgeon Monday. I've tried googling but terrified of the results and can't think straight. Can anyone help talk me down? Positive stories? Resources? What to expect? Any other advice or encouragement? I'm in a terrifying fog.

cliff

Don't google. there is a lot of old outdated info on there and it will scare you. the is a lot of honest info here on this site. I made the google mistake last year when my stage 4 IDC was operated on, BIG MISTAKE! nearly worried my self to death (literally) .

Moderators

Sciteachmama,

Welcome to Breastcancer.org. We're so sorry you have to be here, but really glad you found us. As cliff points out, there's a lot of misinformation out there, but you've come to the best resource for accurate information, wonderful support among our members, and great advice too. You're sure to get many more responses from our ever-helpful members soon that will help calm your spinning head.

In the meantime, you may want to check out the main Breastcancer.org site's section called Breast Cancer 101 for great information on Your Diagnosis, Treatment Options, and lots, lots more. The more info you gather in the next few weeks, the better understanding you'll have of what you're dealing with, and the more manageable this will all seem. We know it's completely overwhelming right now, but you will have power with knowledge and we're all here to help!

Please continue to check back in often and post questions, worries, etc. You're sure to receive great support!

--The Mods

ElaineTherese

Hi!

Yes, hearing that you have cancer is devastating news. ((Hugs)) What will happen next depends a lot on what kind of cancer you have. You say it is IDC, Grade 3. Any other info? (ER/PR/HER2 status? Size of lump? One lump or more [multi-focal]? Nodal involvement?) In any case, just remember that breast cancer is one of the most treatable cancers out there. If caught in the early stages, your prognosis is excellent. Over 90% of women diagnosed with Stages 1 and 2 are still alive after five years, and that number just keeps climbing as treatment improves. Again, ((Hugs))!

Falconer

Sciteachmama,
I'm sorry that you must find yourself here, but you will have lots of support.
I too am a mother of three and my youngest is 3.
Once you have more information from your surgeon, please let us know how we can help. You are not alone. ((Hugs)).

farmerlucy

I would call your doctor today and ask for some meds to help with the anxiety. I never had need of them until my dx - but - they were made for times like these. I took them that first terrifying year, and weaned off with no issues.

I'm so sorry for the diagnosis. I know we all think we are going to die soon - but that that just isn't the case. It is so unfair that you have to face this at your tender age. Feel whatever you feel - those little one are going to be the best medicine you can get. One step at a time, that is all you can do right now.Big hug.

deni1661

Sciteachmama - I am so sorry about your diagnosis but you are in the right place. This site has the most current info and the experience shared by everyone will provide the support you need. The first couple of weeks after diagnosis is scary with all the info and treatment options to consider but you must be strong and remain positive! Try not to freak out until you get all the facts at your oncology appointment. Information is your friend, don't be afraid to ask questions and I strongly urge you to get a second opinion. I am participating in a clinical trial and experiencing great results. There are success stories all over this community and you will be one too! Have faith and fight with everything you have. Your precious kids will be your inspiration. I will keep you in my prayers. Sending hugs, take care

Nwkgoldfinch

Hi there, I am so sorry you are going through this. I was diagnosed this time last year with stage 2 IDC, grade 3. It was triple negative. It was a crappy year, but I am OK now. If you want to message privately, please feel free to send me a message. The early days of getting your bearings are quite hard, but you will get there. The forum is a wonderful resource. - Liz

Sciteachmama

wow, thank you everyone for your quick and kind responses! I did get an anxiety med prescription based on the advice above so hopefully I will sleep. I will check out the resources mentioned. "One step at a time" is my mantra right now. Thank you so much. I'm ready to fight.

bcincolorado

Hi,

Welcome and sorry about your new diagnosis. We know how difficult it can be and how scary, especially at the start of the journey.

Please know this site has a ton of reliable information, podcasts, and the discussion boards you can "browse" without joining in if you just want to see how some deals with things, or ask questions. You will find someone in your exact situation.

All cancers are different and our family situations are different.

Just remember you are NOT alone and everyone here will help and support you anyway they can. Don't give up!

msphil

sweetie i was 42 preparing for Our 2nd marriage when i found lump in shower i had my cry then with family n friend support i decided to fight with Positive thinking and lots if Hope im now this yr Praise God a 23 Yr Survivor.msphil idc stage2 Lmast 0\3 nodes chemo before n after surgery got married between chemo n rads n 5yrs on tamoxifen.

Dennyj

I was diagnosed last year at the age of 39...my girls were 8, 8 (identical twins), 6, & 3....so I understand where you are coming from. I remember having so many different thoughts, so many fears, and feeling completely overwhelmed. I am sure you have probably started to figure things out but know that you are not alone. I feel that BC can be a really lonely diagnosis especially when you are young....but use this website and local resources. I agree with what someone said about getting something for anxiety. I swear by ativan and it has helped me sleep through some nights that I found really difficult. I wish you the best and I am sorry that you have to deal with this -