New here and still confused about everything!

Whymeagain

Hi, I was diagnosed in 2013 With breast cancer and pronounced clear in 2014. In Feb. Of 2016 I went to E.R. for what I thought was a serious flu episode and was told by the E.R. Dr. that I had masses in my liver and lungs. Now I may be the most naive person on the planet, for I honestly did not know I was to go in to my oncologist for monthly blood work, so I didn't. This is a long complicated story and I am trying to keep it short. Right now I have stage 4 metastasized breast cancer and am terrified. I started chemo again in March of 2016 and so many things are happening. I've never been in a support group due to having no vehicle and have done all this alone since 2013. I have looked for people to connect with and I pray I can do so here. Thank you.

DiV

Whymeagain hi i am so sorry you are here. So sorry about your diagnosis. I feel the same as you. I was diagnosed in 2013 too finished treatment and was cancer free for 2 1/2 years. In april i was at work and i thought i pulled a muscle in my back or tore my rotator cuff. I finally went to an orthopedic dictor in September and had an mri. Orthopedic doctor called my oncologist and informed him that i had a chest wall breast cancer recurrence. Now i need to have my whole arm amputated to remove the tumor.

Tina2

Whyme, do not blame yourself! Did anyone actually tell you you were to check in with an oncologist for monthly blood work? That's not the usual protocol if you've been proved "clear" of stage I cancer. I was given a clean bill of "cancer-free" in 1986 by no less an authority than a team of experts at a prestigious Washington, DC teaching hospital. Then --wham--I was diagnosed with lung mets in 2011. Surprise!

But here I am, five years later, still kicking.

Please don't be terrified. There are many treatments, many ways to live hopefully and well with this disease. Tell us more about yourself in your signature. You will find the support and information you need here.

Tina

Kandy

I, also hate that you have this new diagnosis. Not sure what you were told after they claimed you all clear, but irregardless, don't beat yourself up over that. It's definitely water under the bridge, gear your energy to fighting it now. I hope your treatment works very well for you. Wishing you the best.

50sgirl

Whymeagain, Even if you had been having monthly blood tests, which are not the usual routine once you are all clear, you might have found yourself in the same place you are now. Microscopic cancer cells can just sit there waiting to grow, and suddenly, we have mets. That is an oversimplification, of course, but the fact is, we were all shocked by our stage IV diagnosis. I will never forget some of the first words that my breast surgeon said to me with my stage IV diagnosis. She told me NOT to feel guilty. She said that there was nothing that I had done to cause the cancer and nothing that I could have done to prevent it. I cried when she told me that because I was filled with guilt - guilt about what it would do to my family and friends, guilt that I should have seen it coming, all sorts of things. Those few words touched me, so I pass them on to you in hopes that they will help. NONE OF THIS IS YOUR FAULT! What kind of chemo are you having? Have you had any scans since treatment started or are any planned? We are all here for you so you are no longer alone. Ask us questions, complain, rant, whine, feel free to tell us anything. We have all had or are havingmany of the same feelings you are.

Big hugs to you from, Lynne

3-16-2011

whymeagain

I am so sorry you had to get to know us, but also glad you found us. I want to let you know I did keep follow up oncology visits after my initial breast cancer was treated. I even complained about rib pain that was investigated through xray and doctors visits. Still my stage 4 diagnosis was made by surprise in an ER when I thought I had a pulled muscle.( Bone mets to hip,rib, pelvis and back.)

So please don't have regrets about what happened in the past. Cancer is tricky and we grab what we know and move forward. I had so many fears in the beginning but I am past 2 years out and have good quality of life thanks to help from pain meds, doctors and fair response to treatment.

Good luck to you. You will find lots of wisdom and support here.

Peace

Mary

pajim

Welcome whymeagain. Do not feel that you must do this all alone. We're here. No matter your feelings, no matter what treatment you are on, you can find someone here who has been through the same thing and can offer, if not advice, a shoulder to cry on.

And no, you were not to go into your oncologist's for blood work. Put that out of your mind. Right now you are in the shock-and-awe stage of the diagnosis. We've all been there. It WILL get better, I promise. Once you start treatment and the masses start shrinking you'll feel better about life.

Hang in there and let us know how we can help.