Feeling very down today

minmom24

Last week was to be my first week in months that I didn't have any doctor's appointments scheduled and it felt freeing. Instead I spent two nights in the hospital for antibiotic treatment and had surgery to clean out an infection in my right breast and have my tissue expander replaced. He put the new one in deflated, so I am very uneven. My one week follow-up appointment is tomorrow, and I really hope that my drain is removed. I leave on vacation to San Francisco on Saturday, and don't want to be carrying my "hand grenade" through airport security. I had expected the switch to implants in November. That most likely is not happening now. I've been trying to keep a positive attitude, but I just miss my normal life! I was watching my granddaughter a couple of days a week before my first surgery in June. I miss her so much! I miss my job as an OB nurse. I miss walking for 3-4 miles at a time. I've been needing someone to "talk" to, so I turned to others on this board who "have been there." I feel like I'm on a journey that no one in my family understands.

farmerlucy

I remember those time when I just wanted my life back, too. It seems like everyone else is going about their daily tasks and here you are stuck in a nightmare.

Oh heavens, it looks like you were on the same track as me! PBM, a nasty surprise, and then waiting for the node biopsy. Watch out for the PTSD- like symptoms too. Minmom- better days are just around the corner. You'll get there. You'll be holding your granddaughter soon, as well as those new babies. I've had three more granddaughters since my dx - life is worth sticking around for!

If you ever want to commiserate about the nasty surprise, I'm here for you.

I hope your recon gets back on track soon.

Hugs to you!

Luna52

Hi Minmom,

The setbacks are tough, for sure. And its hard for anyone "outside the club" to understand. I've had a few meltdowns that baffled my friends..because they see the overall progress and can't imagine the emotional impact of a setback.

But here's the thing... you WILL be back to your normal life soon... including watching your granddaughter.

This is not unlike when you walked 3 miles and sometimes had to push yourself to walk that 4th mile. You've got it inside you to get through to the other side.

Best wishes,

Luna