Post-Surgery..Awaiting the start of treament.

CFed89

Hi, I am new to the forum, but thought it might be a good idea to hear from others who are going through the same situation.I am 27 years old and a mother of three,6,5,&4. I was diagnosed a little over a month ago with IDC. I had a bilateral mastectomy with reconstruction and axillary lymph node dissection (3 out of 22 tested positive)..I just recently recieved my pathology report which staged me at IIIA because of the size of the tumor and that it metastisized to 3 of my lymph nodes. I will be starting chemotherapy in about two weeks once my port is put in. At this point I am hopeful that I will make a full recovery and have been trying to stay as positive as possible not just for me but for my children, because they are my world and I want nothing more than to be able to watch them grow up and start there own lives. My general surgeon informed me at my appt yesterday that i will lose my hair, the idea does bother me but I would much rather lose my hair than my life. I was told after recieveing my pathology report that I am currently cancer free but for some reason in my mind I can't believe it..I have always been one to frown upon hypochondriacs but am now turning into one myself..I've convinced myself that the cancer has spread and I think until I have more scans done my mind will not be at ease..is this normal to feel this way? I guess I need to hear that other people have gone through this same thing and are doing better...

Moderators

Hi CFed89-

We want to welcome you to BCO. We're sorry for the circumstances that have brought you here, but we hope you this to be a place of support and encouragement as you begin your treatment.

Your feelings are totally normal! A cancer diagnosis comes with a lot of uncertainty. The in-between times can be especially anxious. We think you'll find that even members who are NED years out from diagnosis always feel that inkling of worry.

We have a forum for our members who are under 30 and have been diagnosed, which we think you might find helpful, as far as finding other members who can relate to being young and having young children. You can find it here: https://community.breastcancer.org/forum/27. It can be a lot to balance the stress of diagnosis and treatment with the day-to-day life of raising young children, so connecting with other members in your shoes could be a great source of support for you!

The Mods

ElaineTherese

Hi!

I was diagnosed at Stage IIIA, too, though I was older (46). After five months of chemo, surgery, radiation, and a year of targeted therapy, I am considered to have "no evidence of disease" (NED). In fact, I just had a clean mammogram two days ago. But, there's no guarantee that I'm completely cancer-free. There may be microscopic cancer cells circulating through my bloodstream and/or lymph system. That's why I'm doing hormone therapy, which is supposed to starve cancer cells of estrogen, which helps them thrive. So, no, I don't consider you to be paranoid.

As far as scans go, I've had my share of PET scans, which are supposed to show whether cancer has spread. But no scans are perfect, and both PETs and MRIs can give false positives. So, sometimes they actually produce more anxiety than they are worth.

While it is fine to try to stay positive for your kids, sometimes, it's OK to just vent, complain, get angry, or cry. None of us are model cancer patients all the time! So, it's OK to feel fear and to take some time to process what you're going through. Take care of yourself!

CFed89

Thank you for your story, everytime i hear a positive story it makes coping that much easier

nye1980

CFed89, I am also Stage 3A and my MO also said to me, after my mastectomy, to keep in mind that we had removed the cancer and now would do everything we could to keep it from coming back. True or not, that gives me a lot of strength when I'm having a tough day. My four-year-old pretty much keeps me going and I think you'll find that in your littles as well. It's exhausting doing all of this cancer stuff and parenting, but nothing brings me more joy than when I feel almost normal in between infusions and can be a mom to her again. It makes all of this worth it. The mental stuff is hard. I'm three months post diagnosis and only now have moments when I don't think about cancer. Everyone says that gets better eventually. So I just go with it.

Thinking of you and sending you so much love.