I want to puke...

Twaz

Positive. Grade 2. Triple negative. In lymph nodes. Doctor indicated I will need a mastectomy, so I'm going to a hospital with a plastic surgeon, as I am only 43. I'm guessing because of the triple negative, chemo will happen too.

I'm scared, but don't feel alone. I just want it out of me. I have two school aged kids- 8 and 11. I'm scared for them and my husband. One of my childhood friends passed a couple of years ago and my neighbor a little longer ago than that.

Waiting for next steps is brutal. What if it spreads? What if I already have it in my bones or brain or somewhere? So many questions...

Beatmon

try to Sit tight as my mother used to say. It is very brutal waiting for the next steps to fall into place so that you can figure out what your plan will be. For me, and others who have posted, the anxiety seems to lessen once you know what steps you are going to have to take.

It is so scary, especially with young children. Try to hang in there and don't visualize the worst possible scenario.

Lots of younger women like yourself with the same diagnosis will be on board to help you through this. There is a lot of love on these boards to share with you.

Brenda E

Kicks

You didn't mention what type of BC you are dealing with - DCIS, IDC, ILC, IBC. The TX (treatment) plan is varied for the different types.

Your TX plan should include not just a surgeon but also a Chemo Dr (MO) and a Rads Dr (RO) for the best TX plan. It is a Team Effort working together - not just different Drs going each in their own way without coordinating TX to be able to get the best results. Has your 'case' been taken to the Board at the Facility you are going to?

Surgery is not always the best option first option TX choice today. Neoadjuvant Chemo (Chemo pre-surgery) is one that is SOP for one type but is becoming more common with other types for the best outcome.

Bone scan, full body MRI and PET scans will probably be scheduled to check for possible mets to aid in getting the best TX plan for you.

Get a notebook and write down every question you come up with, make a second copy and hand it to your Dr(s) for answers.

Twaz

Thanks, Kicks. I don't know what type. Getting the news was bad enough, so I didn't think to ask. I assume it's IDC, since it has spread to at least one lymph node.

Still waiting on the call back from the doctor on my appointments. The waiting is the hardest part.

Denise-G

Twaz - the waiting is the absolute hardest part.  I am VERY sorry you have to deal with this at 43. 

The best thing you can do for yourself is get the absolute best doctors in your area.  Don't just settle

for anyone!!   

It will all get better once you have a plan in place.  Right now, it is just utter terror.

Sending my best to you and your family.

placid44

Twaz,

I'm sorry to hear that. I'm triple negative also, diagnosed 3 1/2 years ago at age 44. If you like, check out the "Calling All TNs" thread. https://community.breastcancer.org/forum/72/topics... I would echo the comment that your docs may well recommend chemo before surgery. That's common with TN. I don't know whether the grade 2 (rather than grade 3) changes anything. Are you going to a hospital/practice with docs who specialize in breast cancer

mara51506

I echo what was said above. Couple things I would add. I am sure you have thought of this but take someone extra with you to appointments. When you do start getting so much information it can be easy to miss questions or information the doctors provide because at first there is so much to deal with. As hard as it will be, do NOT compare your situation to that of your friend and I am so sorry for you on that one. You are an individual. Please do not look to google for survival stats, they are usually out of date and do not take you and your individual health into account. There will be many more people along to give suggestions. Kicks above is correct, when you do get your pathology, have the doctor explain clearly what it is, what it means, not just medical but layman's terms as well. One day at a time. It will be a long process to get through but it will get mapped out for you. I am sorry you are having to join us here but you will get a lot of help from others on here.

placid44

Good idea on bringing a friend with you. If you are a reader, here are some reputable websites/sources about diagnosis/pathology. http://beltwaybreastcancer.blogspot.com/p/diagnosis.html

BethL

Twaz- I don't have a lot to add to what's already been said but wanted to say we are all in this together. Cancer stinks, no question, but here you are among amazing women who have been through it all. As hard as it is, breathe.

Hugs

Bet

hikerchic

Twaz,

Again, I am one day behind you. Received "the phone call" from the radiologist this a.m. All she said was it was positive and "sorry." Geez....so like my typical self, I asked questions and got a few answers. Mass and node positive. High grade IDC. I am seeing the surgeon and onc this afternoon.

I'm with you in this....we're tough....all of us here.

Trvler

I am sorry. I have young kids, too. I know it's scary. Node involvement doesn't necessarily mean IDC. I had two positive nodes and had ILC. The treatment in my case wasn't any different. But ILC can be harder to detect, hence my decision to go with the BMX. I would strongly encourage you to join a chemo group. I couldn't have made it without the lovely ladies in my group. Best of luck to you. Please use BC.org for support. It is a great place to get answers.

Blessings2011

Twaz - so sorry you've become part of a club that no one wants to join, but the benefit is that there are hundreds of sisters here who understand.

I wasn't triple negative, but my friend in quilting class was. When we met 5 years ago, she was a 15 year survivor. I guess that now makes it 20 years for her. She took things one day at a time, did what was recommended for her particular situation, dealt with family issues, and today is happy and healthy and enjoying being a grandma.

Try to keep busy, so your mind isn't consumed with the "what-if's".... and once you have a firm treatment plan, you will feel more in control.

Wishing you the best....