Thought Provoking Writing Exercise About Illness

DivineMrsM

I had a request to post this in an area on the forum where more users would see it. Tho it was posted on the stage iv board it can benefit a person dealing with any stage of breast cancer.

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Recently, while cleaning, I came across a writing exercise I'd done in 2011 when I was diagnosed with stage iv breast cancer. I'd been reading a book (not sure but it might have been "Getting Well Again"). It asked the reader to examine their lives and list five replies to each of a series of thought-provoking sentences.

I wanted to share the sentences as this may be something that especially those new to a breast cancer diagnosis may find worth their time. I wrote down the sentences and answers in a small notebook and showed it to absolutely no one nor discussed it with anyone back then.

**Stress is addressed a number of times. As a disclaimer, I don't believe the way we did or didn't deal with stress prior to bc caused the disease to attack our bodies, however, I'm a firm believer that recognizing and reducing stress is important for quality of life.**

I wrote brutally honest answers. Some were often lengthy and very raw. My own personal answers aren't the point here, tho I'll briefly share a few of them in a follow-up post. And I'm not asking anyone to put their answers here, either. This is absolutely something that can be very personal and private. Sentence #7 almost seems controversial yet I found my answers to it to be very revealing.

Even if you chose not to sit down and write your answers, this will give you something to think about and consider.

~Camille~

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1. List the stress I have experienced in the 18 months prior to receiving a diagnosis of breast cancer (I had more than 5 lengthy answers).

2. List the 5 greatest stresses in my life now.

3. Examine ways I could be participating in maintaining the stresses.

4. Consider ways to remove stress.

5. Am I creating supportive/nurturing elements in my life?

6.Consider whether I could remove these stresses or balance them in my life if I put my own needs first more often.
Do I permit myself to consider what my own needs are?
Have I attempted to find ways to meet them despite what I feel are the needs of others?

7. List 5 most important benefits I received from a major illness.

DivineMrsM

Here is a brief summary of my lists. My notebook is actually filled with pages of writing. I don't think I sat down and did this all at one sitting, tho certainly you could do that if you wanted.

1. Here is a list of the stress I have experienced in the 18 months prior to receiving a diagnosis of breast cancer:

My answers (more than 5) included but not limited to: marital stress, helping my son cope with the emotional breakup of his first girlfriend, issues with my siblings, unfriendly administration at work, one of our cats died, mother-in-law troubles

2. List the 5 greatest stresses in my life now.

My answers: Time constraints, worrying about celebrating my son's senior year in high school while I go thru chemo, guilt for getting cancer, unnecessary obligations

3. Examine ways I could be praticipating in maintaining the stresses.

Volunteering too much, taking on problems of others, trying to keep everyone updated on my health

4. Consider ways to remove stress.

Hire help for home improvements, stop volunteering, allow time for fun stuff

5. Am I creating supportive/nurturing elements in my life?

Taking time off work for treatments, asking for help to and from treatment, asking for more help from dh and ds around the house, permitting myself to have fun, joining this forum!

6.Consider whether I could remove these stresses or balance them in my life
if I put my own needs first more often.
Do I permit myself to consider what my own needs are?
Have I attempted to find ways to meet them despite what I feel are the needs of others?

Remembering to tune in to what my needs are and then allowing those needs to be met!

7. List 5 most important benefits I received from a major illness.

Able to take time off from work where I was feeling marginalized, shed the burden of taking care of my mother-in-law, less or no guilt getting more of my needs met and getting less resistance from others about it, moving beyond issues with siblings to a place of support, loved ones realizing that life is limited.