Just diagnosed and overwhelmed

Kdettwiller

My biopsy results came back two days ago and I am seeing a surgeon today to talk about treatment plans. I found a lump a couple of weeks ago. Everything is moving so fast that my head is spinning. This is amplified my mother's passing two months agobfrom a long battle with pancreatic cancer. I dread telling my children and father. They say the prognosis is good but treatment will be for at least a year. Now I need to look into short term disability and fmla. I am already strapped financially. .luckily i have a close knit family who i know will be supportive but I have so many things spinning around in my head that I find it hard to know where to start first.

rwiley4529

I'm sorry you've had to join this sorority, but you've come to the best place there is! Try to remember to breathe...

As hard as it can be to remember, the cancer didn't just show up a few weeks ago when you found it, so if you need to take some time to get second opinions, do research, change doctors, or whatever, it won't cause any harm.

Kdettwiller

Just so shocking. ..I had a mammogram in march that showed nothing. I feel blessed to have a highly regarded breast cancer center a few miles from where I live. I do trust them . I am an RN and asked several physicians their opinions on the best docs in the area....just afraid of the unknowns and being able to take care of my family during the treatment.

Moderators

Kdettwiller, Welcome!

We're so sorry you have to be here but really glad you found us. Our Community is chock full of wonderful people who will provide great support and advice to you during this overwhelming time. Try to just take a deep breath and take one thing at a time. Once you meet with your doctors, go over your diagnosis, and have a pathology report in hand, you'll feel better about making treatment decisions and more empowered by the information. Please, come back here often and ask questions and share your story; we're all here to help!

When you're ready, the main Breastcancer.org site's pages on Paying for Your Care offers very helpful suggestions about alleviating the financial burden of a diagnosis. There's also some great advice in the Employment, Insurance and Other Financial Issues forum.

We hope this helps! Please keep us all posted!

--The Mods

Sjacobs146

Don't worry too much about short term disability, depending on what you do for a living. I worked through treatment, and needed to take only 7 sick days. I did my radiation treatments during my lunch hour. Everything depends on your treatment plan. You are at the most difficult point right now. Once treatment is decided, you'll feel more in control. This thing is not going to kill you yet, the 5 year survival rate for BC is something like 97 or 98 percent. That's what I said to my kids when i told them: "I'm not going to die from this for a long time." This will likely be just a small bump in the road of life for you

keepthefaith

k, sorry you found yourself here. I totally get your worries and they are justified. I am self-employed and single, so finances were a huge issue for me. I did work most of the time through my treatment; I talked to the social services lady at my medical center and she helped me apply for a grant to pay for some of my chemo and Neulasta shot. I had a huge insurance deductible that spanned over two periods, so it was a big help. So, try to focus on getting through your treatment and let others help and support you when they can. It's not fun, but it will work out. Take one day at a time. ((HUGS))

MsPharoah

Kdetwiller, Big hugs to you and so thankful that you have a support system in place. Telling your family members is always so difficult. I told my husband first, then my two grown children as soon as I had my wits about me and could be calm and reassuring. The term I used was "I'm not falling off a cliff...in fact your father and I are going out to dinner tonight....just as we always do!" I promised my children that I would keep them informed and as it turned out, my daughter's network of friends were extremely supportive to both her and me. Good advice given and it made my DD feel like she was helping. My treatment lasted about a year. I was able to work from home when necessary. My surgery was easy....lumpectomy on Washington's birthday which was a company holiday and then I worked from home the next week. The recovery was easy. I had a lot of follow up appointments for genetic counseling and additional imaging before the surgery. I just scheduled time off work for those, easy. When chemo was on the table, I had to make some adjustments. I missed 6 days, 1 day each for the treatments (but I wouldn't have needed a full day to do that if the infusion center was more organized). I had a Neulasta shot the day after chemo and I scheduled that during my lunch break. Chemo side effects vary. My oncologist knew I wanted to work during chemo and supported that by helping me manage the side effects. You may not require chemo depending on the biology of your tumor but if you do, you will want to have support with the household duties should you decide to work. I was lucky as my husband took care of everything but I was capable to do a lot of things and most days, I felt fully capable to keep a normal schedule. Radiation was easy for me. I had my treatment early in the morning on the way to work. I even scheduled a trip to see my grandson's 1st birthday the last week of radiation and I did fine. As soon as you get your bearings, start investigating all the ways that cancer patients can get financial assistance with co-pays, housecleaning, transportation, wigs, hats/scarves, etc.

And take some deep breaths....You aren't falling off a cliff and if you feel like you are slipping, we are going to hold you up!
Love and hugs, MsP

phrogger78

Good Luck. I do hope you don't have to take too much time off work. I am a nursing student so I only have clinicals once, sometimes twice a week, and so far (I haven't started treatment yet) but the Dr's seem to think there is no reason why I should not be able to continue. I will take advantage of an N95 if I need to, and keep up very good hand hygiene, but other than being very tired, they don't seem to think it will be an issue. I really hope the same is true for you.

Kdettwiller

Thank you all for responding. Hopefully I will be able to be as much of a support to all of you. I saw the surgeon today. Blood work/xrays/ekg on Monday...appt with oncologist on Tuesday. MRI hopefully next week. Port placement in two weeks then starting chemo andc radiation. Radiation will be just about every day. Being an RN in a hospital it is going to be difficult to go on my 30 minute lunch break..most days i sit at the nurses station and gulp down my food. Im thinking on my workdays I can go after work since radiology is always open at hospitals. Surgery will follow at some point to remove the tumor. Praying the MRI comes back ok.....im planning to have fmla paperwork rwady to bring to my appointment Tuesday. Surgeon said there isnt any way to know how the chrmo will affect me until i start. I am also planning a haircut withon a couple of weeks. My hair is halfway down my back. Going cut it at least shoulder length befire it starts falling out