Anniversary Celebration?

breathe

I just ended, less than 2 months ago, my almost year long surgery, chemo, radiation treatments. Somehow I feel unsettled or like everyone around me is just glad it's over but I still feel like it's a big deal. I'm sure some of you know what I mean. I wanted to do something to mark the end. To celebrate life to celebrate me. But with 3 small kids our celebration seemed to have little to do with me. August 1 is my one year anniversary of my bilateral mastectomy. This was the day that I truly became cancer free (in theory). I thought I could try again and celebrate this important anniversary, but I'm really stuck on what to do. I somehow want it to be symbolic. I had my surgery in NYC so maybe a fun day in the city instead of one of the million office visits I've had. Or maybe something physical surrounded by nature to celebrate life and all the beauty in it. I'm just so torn because it feels so big and nothing feels right as a celebration. Maybe I'm still too close to it. I'd love to hear any of your thoughts or anything you've done to commemorate (probably a better word than celebrate!). TIA! I really appreciate you weighing in on this!