STEAM ROOM FOR ANGER

Yndorian

I'm a single woman with a 21 years old son who has his life, no job, my mother has alzheimer, my father drinks, I have a brother who has his life too (had his life because now he is taking care about me, my mother, my father, we all are in his backs) I always think what is the point to survive in this conditions. Sorry, just having a bad day

marijen

Oh that’s funny! Let’s hope they don’t charge us for family members too, retroactive. Did the fellow give you another number to call? Mine did but the chat was lost when I tried to save it. I wasn’t about to use it anyways. I have received notices from Medicare that a bill is in review or something. I kept calling the hospital checking if they had taken action. They kept telling me not to worry and eventually it was taken care of. But not five years back. There is something, now I remember, the hospital has to inform you that Medicare won’t pay before a service. If they didn’t you aren’t liable. I will try to remember what it’s called. Maybe someone else knows...

jaycee49

marijen, $2743.88. But posts after mine by JoJo and yndorian make me think. That is not such a big deal when those two seem to be experiencing such despair. My bill will get settled and I have the resources (mental, etc.) to move forward. We here are sending you two all the support we can muster. Sometimes venting helps and sometimes it it just a matter of time passing and things getting better. I hope that happens soon for you both. Please ask for help. That's the hardest thing to do, I know.

marijen

You’re right Jaycee, we have to keep these problems in perspective. Here is what I’m referring too:

MEDICARE ADVANCE WRITTEN NOTICES OF NONCOVERAGE. This has to be given you by the hospital at least two days before. Although they usually give you a form while you’re on the table agreeing to pay what Medicare won’t. My sister refuses to sign it at that point.

jaycee49

This is the only good information I got from the chat:

"This claim was adjusted by a Medicare claims contractor. A contractor may adjust a claim if: •The contractor made a processing error. •The claim processed incorrectly because the provider filed the claim with missing information. •There is invalid information indicated in a field on the claim. The provider must resubmit the claim correctly for Medicare to process the claim"

They seem to be blaming the whole thing on the provider (hospital).

Yndorian

Jaycee49 - please don't feel guilty about expressing your anger. This is what this thread is about. There are not comparisons here. Some people are worse than us for sure. I hope that God never sends us all the problems we could endure. Thanks for the kindness

bcincolorado

jo-jo you are right---cancer is the pits.

Snickersmom

Jaycee - I have never heard of anything like that!! I used to work for attorneys both in CT and NC and when we had a client who "couldn't" pay a bill - even a huge one - I would call and tell them that I needed to negotiate the charges down to something affordable for our client. And they did it. So don't pay a penny until you talk to someone who can help you with this, even if you have to contact your lawyer. It just doesn't make any sense. and you are right - you don't need the stress. take a deep breath and relax.

marijen

Jaycee, that’s the exact notice I have received. Don’t worry, the hospital will fix it because they don’t want to be stuck with the balance due. They overcharge anyways.

Micmel

Nursing home facilities are really like a barn with stalls for the horses. Last month my father's wonderful roommate passed away from the flu and pneumonia. Wonderful man. Then they bring this creep in and all he wants to talk about is is black belt. And fighting. Alarm number one. So I told the head nurse. I don't think this is going to work. The man is hard of hearing and my father isn't and his television could be heard in New Jersey, that's how loud it was. He is wheelchair bound, where as my father isn't, he's bed ridden, but can be transferred to a wheelchair for a limited time. His roommate bangs into his bed every single

Time he moves out of the room. If my dad is sleeping. Not anymore. In the middle of the night he wakes up and notices the staff turned the tv off and on it goes for Canada's pleasure to hear wagon train at 200 am. We said it's not working and we don't want him in here, it's not a good match. We were told we had to wait till a bed opened. That next day , the dude started assaulting the nurses calling them really vulgar names and was throwing wheel

Chair legs through the air and was extremely close to hitting my father. The police came and he was taken away in the paddy wagon. However later that night they brought him back and said he would have to wait out the paper work for federally awarding him to the state. (Minimum of 90days). So they moved my father out to a single room for his safety. So today, a bed opened up. And he was being moved yet again. Anxious again seeing his stuff being moved. But no call to the family to let us know so we could adjust our schedules. Sometimes when I walk through the hallways of those places. I see the wheelchairs stacked In front of the television, mostly ladies all alone. Crying out for attention. If I'm honest I don't know how long they hav even been sitting there. My father is not alone. Everyday he has someone visit. I've had several people say the children place the parents in the places and never visit. It's really very very sad. But the entire nursing home facility leaves a lot to be desired. It's really a shitty way To have to live no less die. I struggle with guilt wishing I could bring him home with me. I'm just too sick to do it. He's safe and they do a good job, it's just little things randomly bug the hell out of me. And some of these nurses are assholes. Seriously like find another profession, because you're really a bitch!

Yndorian

Micmel - I'm sorry about your father. These should be the quietest moments in his life and instead he has endure all that crap. It is not fair. But he has been blessed with a daughter like you, others don't even have that. I hope for a sooner solution. Kisses

bcincolorado

Oh michmel what a terrible way to treat someone who needs care. I'm glad your father has some support at least with other family as well. Will keep you all in my prayers.

JoaniePA

LONG -

Hi hi all, I just found this group this morning while I was looking for information on letrozol. This will be the third aromatase inhibitor I've tried. I was diagnosed two years ago with IDC in both breasts and some lymphatic vesicle involvement. DX score was intermediate, but they convinced me I didn't need chemotherapy. the surgery came and went, and I was shocked at how much they took of my left breast, including the nipple. But it did heal up and I started thinking about reconstruction. The radiation on both breasts undid me. The skin became open sores, and then turned black. Fatigue and nausea more unbearable by the end. the aromatase inhibitors finished it off and I have not felt like myself ever since.

I see that I really don't have to tell you what a life-changing event this breast cancer thing is. 2 years ago I was extremely active, biking, yoga, skiing, playing pickleball etc.. Now I try very hard to keep active but I feel like I'm a hundred and eighty years old some days, and after two years I've lost momentum.

It's funny that after the initial treatment how everybody thinks it's over. I don't expect people to understand and usually keep my mouth shut, but it really irritates me.

Irritants:

Let me know if there's anything I can do to help. (Nice thing to say, but if I'm struggling don't put it on me to decide what you're going to do to help me. A dear friend of mine came over and weeded my gardens. Others dropped off food. All without asking. Bless them)

You're cured (Really? Hope so.. waiting out the YEARS AHEAD IN WHICH RECURRENCE OR METS CAN OCCUR.)

My friend had breast cancer.. hers was really bad. Worse than yours. (HOW DO YOU KNOW? AND YOUR POINT IS??!)

You're so strong. (NO I'M NOT!!)

You're a fighter. (NO I'M NOT!!)

And I hate those ads where the woman with breast cancer says, "I'm relentless too!" And then rides off on a bicycle or goes out to play tennis or something. Or how about the new add where you go to the drugstore and buy cosmetics so that you can look beautiful while you're wearing a wig or a scarf, or have lymphedema from surgeries and irradiated lymph nodes, or you've gone up a dress size or so in the waist and down a few cups up top. Give me a break. I'm a scared sissy, a who has thinning hair and wears compression garments. New makeup is NOT going to make me feel beautiful.. Strong? What choice do we really have except to continue on??

Thanks for letting me RANT!

Micmel

Joanie~ I appreciate and agree with everything you just said. I'm sick of hearing. You should be happy you're doing so well. Really ?? Then how come it takes me three hours to wake up and get my feet feeling, so I can walk without falling on my face!! Cancer not only is life altering. It ruins who we are. We become lost in this New normal and feel like we are supposed to slap a smile on and join in with the crowd? I'm so sorry for anyone that has ever heard the words, “you have cancer", the floor drops out and youre falling into the abyss of the unknown, grasping at anyone around you, that you crave safety of what you use to feel. And still we fall.. flailing like a bird with two broken wings. Not knowing how hard you'll hit when the ground comes a knocking. Then Bam! Still broken.

Snickersmom

Joanie and Micmel - you both said it so well.

bcincolorado

Well said.

Having someone help without being asked is what is needed.

Cancer commercials stink.

The gifts of "pink stuff" stinks too from people who think they are supportive.

Meow13

I am sick of all the BS too. It is a disease that has a terrible treatment regiment. Better medicines and a cure needed, badly needed.

JanetMara

AliceBastable,

I see my husband the same way as yours but when he said, " I think and I feel like I will follow you within a year after you're gone" .I silently cried when I went to sleep.

JanetMara

JanetMara

I exactly have the same feeling Micmel.

JanetMara

JanetMara

Meow13.

I feel you,I just had 2 sessions and I stopped it due to harsh side effects.Now I am doing what Naturopathics have told me,diet avoiding sugar.My ONCO told me to go see a RADIATION ONCO,my platelets are going lower and lower and scared of bleeding but not my ONCOLOGIST,he never cared,only for the money he gets from CHEMO.

JoaniePA

Bcincolorado.. hahaha.. yeah, the pink stuff. I forgot that one

mistyeyes

I  think years and years from now people are going to be shocked and mortified reading about how people with cancer were poisoned as a treatment.

bcincolorado

mistyeyes just like we laugh when we read how things were treated in the early 1900s. We are all really test subjects for future generations.

Carpediem56

And quit calling it a journey, it's a nightmare!

molliefish

I'm so sorry that you find it a nightmare. That is such a horrible experience for you. For some of us it truly is a long and stressful journey fraught with success and pitfalls both, we should Describe it as it occurs for each of us. A journey, a nightmare, a process, a path. It is what it is.

Carpediem56

Well, I choose my journeys, I choose my paths. I don't choose my nightmares!

mara51506

Speaking as one of the many who have to be in treatment FOREVER, I choose not to call it a journey. It is simply part of my life. I do however respect each person's right to describe their own cancer in their own way. Journey may help to cope, nightmare can be true to. Whatever helps to get us through the day.

The only time I get angry is when people tell me how I should react if they haven't had cancer or another awful illness.

Lita57

I hate calling it a journey too.

It's not like i called a travel agent and asked them to book me on this trip to hell.

I pick and plan my own "journeys," and this is certainly not one i would've chosen.

L

Yndorian

Mara51506 - today was my last IV chemo and I thought "it is the last, no matter what happens in the future. I will take another options, even none, but this never again". I have a supraclav node, so if radiation can't take care about it I might be in stage 4 soon but this treatmen was brutal to me. I will not repeat it

Meow13

My bs said it was like climbing a mountain. That doesn't work for me, not helpful. It is never over until we die, but it is putting it aside and living. I still have hope of better medicine, a real cure that doesn't affect good health.