Should I convince my mum to have surgery earlier?

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Julia1987
Julia1987 Member Posts: 7
edited June 2015 in Just Diagnosed

Hello everyone.

My mum (55) has been diagnosed with breast cancer a couple of days ago. As for everyone here it has been a terrible shock for her. I have tried to be as supportive as possible while she waited for the biopsy results. The doctor said the tumor is 2.1 cm and fortunately so far the lymph nodes are clear. He suggested a breast conserving surgery(only tumor taken out with some healthy tissue) and radiation. Although it's not going to be easy for the next couple of months the doctor has said there is an 85% chance she will not need any other treatment and will live her normal life as before.My worry is that my mum has set her next consultation with the breast surgeon in 2 weekes time and surgery in another week from that appointment. This means surgery almost a month after the biopsy. She is saying she needs time to mentally prepare for the surgery and treatment as well as sort out some minor work issues. I am terrified that by the time she has surgery the cancer might spread to the lymph nodes and she will need more radical treatment. Can you please advise whether it is appropriate for me to try and convince her to have surgery earlier? I understand I can not be selfish and say to another person what they should do with their body but I am so afraid of losing her as my grandma on my dad's side died from breast cancer.

Thank you!

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  • debiann
    debiann Member Posts: 1,200
    edited June 2015

    My surgery was about a month after dx. I think that falls into the typical range. I'm sorry your family is going through this. Your mom is lucky to have a caring and supportive daughter.

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  • Julia1987
    Julia1987 Member Posts: 7
    edited June 2015

    Thank you so much Debian!

    That makes me feel much better knowing that the timing is OK. Thank you for you support. I greatly appreciate it! All the very best to you.

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  • Julia1987
    Julia1987 Member Posts: 7
    edited June 2015

    Thank you so much Debiann!

    That makes me feel much better knowing that the timing is OK. Thank you for you support. I greatly appreciate it! All the very best to you.

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  • fizzdon52
    fizzdon52 Member Posts: 568
    edited June 2015

    Yes I agree with Debiann, this falls within an acceptable time frame and I know of people who have had to wait longer. You are a lovely daughter, but Mums are just so special aren't they? Good luck to your Mum and your family on this journey :)

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  • Julia1987
    Julia1987 Member Posts: 7
    edited June 2015

    Thank you so much Fizzdon52! You are so right! Mums are so very special! Thank you for your great support and advice! All the best to you and your family!

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  • Moderators
    Moderators Member Posts: 25,912
    edited June 2015

    Julia1987-

    We just want to welcome you to our community here at BCO. We're so sorry for what your mom and family are going through. Hopefully, once she's had surgery and begins her treatment, it will feel a little less scary and a little more manageable!

    We hope you find the support and advice you need during your time hear, and again, welcome!

    The Mods

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