From NED to Another Biospy

bride

Well, there I was, having hair, showing NED, and starting to decompress. I had a horrible meeting with my MO who left for private practice. Unfortunately, this was the same day I was in severe pain on my spine. My ex-MO suggested I discuss it at a survivorship meeting to be held in July. By the grace of God, the nurse-practioner heard me. She makes an appointment with a new MO for the following week. These is my third MO -- I'm getting paranoid. My new MO looks like she's 15 but is brilliant. She sends me off for a MRI.

There's something on the MRI. Now I'm wanting to be told when someone will scrape my spinal bone. For two weeks I've been a total mess. This is so much more frightening than my original DX. I don't know what all this means but I've already got it that they can't just cut out bits of my spine -- it's not a MX and ALND.

I feel like I'm running in circles. I'm barely eating or sleeping. My caregiver/DP is in almost as bad shape as me.

How do I deal with this? I can't imagine any way to handle this. It took me two weeks to be able to write this: what is written seems more real than what I think.

Damn. I can't do this.

bride

linzer

I'm so sorry to hear that you are in pain, have had tough time with MO's, and are facing the waiting game with more testing and uncertainty. I'm glad to hear that you do have a DP who can hold your hand when you need it most. I don't have any sage advice about how to deal but I wanted to say that I'm thinking of you and hoping that you will have answers soon. Big hugs from me to you!

Linda

JJMAMA

I have no advice either Bride, but I'm praying that what they found is just some benign artifact or something.  I am praying for you!!  You are in my thoughts.  Take it one day at a time!

Moderators

Bride-

We're so sorry. Take it one day at a time, and deal with it any way you can. You're in our thoughts.

The Mods