Breast Sensitivity and Sex

Hope555

Hi All-

I had a double mastectomy a few months ago, along with immediate reconstruction. I felt for me, I did not have an option, that the mastectomy was the right way to go. However, my biggest concern was always the loss of feeling in my breasts and how that would impact my sex life. My breasts used to be such a source of pleasure for me, and I am terrified to think that they might never bring me pleasure again. I'm feeling particularly bad about it today. I am not in a relationship, but I have been getting glimpses of what my dating/sex life will be once I complete chemotherapy, and I am starting to panic. Have you had similar feelings? How are you/have you dealt with this? Thank you so much for your help.

exbrnxgrl

Hi Hope,

I am sorry that you have to deal with this. It sounds as if you were/are aware of the loss of sensation. To be blunt, chances are you will never have more than basic skin sensation return. All of your breast tissue and nerves have been removed. I think, for me, the way I have dealt with it is to fully accept the idea that this was necessary for my health and that in the greater scheme of things, it was a small sacrifice. I have implants but things might be different for those with flap recons. You are still fairly new to this so please allow yourself more time to adjust.

TessaW

I'm sorry. I know this SO sucks! I wish I had better news for you. I had a BMX Jan 2014. I have implants and hate to even touch them. Like you, my breasts used to be a pleasure. ( My best asset unfortunately.) Weird thing: I broke out with a hellish painful, itchy rash all over my body a couple weeks ago and it was head to toe. Even the scarred skin over my implants were covered. They feel so foreign it surprised me that I could even break out on the outer skin.

I try to think of the words of my onc nurse when it really bothers me "It's better than the alternative."

I don't think it helps to sugarcoat anything. Better to be upfront so people can try to mentally and emotionally prepare. Even though I hate mine that doesn't mean that you won't like yours. You might. At least we don't have to worry about straps showing in the summer. You can wear tanks, racerbacks, and halters without sagging. That's one plus.

HUGS

TessaW

I'm sorry Hope. I was writing as if you hadn't had your implants when obviously you have. I cried after the high sitting TE's were taken out and I woke up with low sitting, widespread hamburger buns. If I had the option I'd go back to TE's. Do you at least like the shape?

As far as a sex life.... Pfft, what's that ? ( In my case anyway.)

Don't lose hope. Your sich can get so much better. I've started to see a counselor down at the cancer pavilion to try and deal with my many frustrations. Maybe that would help?

ashell

I've had issues with my breast sensitivity too. I had a UMX, but I also had a small implant placed on the non-mx side for better symmetry (even though they're still less symmetrical than I was anticipating). I was aware that I would have the loss of sensation on the mx side, but now my sensation on the other side is all out of whack too. It's TOO sensitive. I used to get so much pleasure from my breasts as well and now I'm happiest just leaving them out of the situation completely. Sigh. They do still get included most of the time, but I actually prefer when my partner touches the mx side because I can't really feel it; I don't really get pleasure out of the "native" side anymore, the sensitivity is uncomfortable. I guess to deal with it I appreciate the rest of my body, and enjoy the great feelings that come from being caressed in areas like my back, neck, and behind my ears. Areas that I never really paid attention to before.

I had my last surgery almost 2 years ago, and it's definitely taken time to adjust. I'm still adjusting, but it does get easier to deal with in time. I'm sending you positive thoughts through the recovery process.

JJOntario

I feel like I've lost "2nd" base. It's one of those SE's that no one talks about.