Starting Chemo March 2015

ninjamary

Jumble - I hate those people. I've only come across one couple like that. I'd love to tell them "That's so interesting. My mother had breast cancer with partial masectomy and didn't do chemotherapy and only had radiation. She was dead 5 years later from it metastasizing to her bones and finally her liver. Explain that! Asshole!" No I didn't say that because I was feeling like shit, the woman was trimming my wig at the time. Their daughter who had breast cancer refused chemo and I didn't want to tell them that I felt she made a bad decision. Seriously, because it's not my business.

On a side note today I went au naturel at work. Everyone loves it. One employee told me I should trim my hair. LOL. Uh...no f'n way! No scissors to these locks. My hair has started to curl, or sort curl as there isn't enough there to curl.

ksusan

People. They bug me. Look stunned and burst into heaving sobs. It gives you a great excuse to leave.

ninjamary

KSUSAN - love it!!!

molly1976

I had someone tell me this morning about how his mother in law was supposed to be dead from brain mets at Christmas but she's still alive and doing great! It doesn't help me to hear that, guy.

Trvler

It reminds me of that show, The Office. I never really watched it but that guy always said stuff that was wrong. Cringeworthy.

Trvler

So do you guys remember when I was so upset because my sister in law said she would take care of my kids along with her daughter while I was gone and then she reneged leaving me with her two daughters, one responsible one and one not so responsible? Well, guess which one just informed me she is coming the entire time?

ninjamary

Allison - are you kidding me? No, I know you are not. What does your husband say about this? Is it his sister or his brother's wife? I'd put my foot down. You do not need the stress of that. If it's his family he should deal with it. Man up!

Trvler

Yes, it's HIS family. HIS sister. He is notoriously bad at confrontation. I think the same thing you do. He needs to talk to them. But he won't. He is so freaking scared of what they think. I found out she did the same thing to his OTHER sister at some point. Promised to take care of her kids and bailed at the last minute. Not sure what the circumstances were…although at one point her husband had colon cancer.

ksusan

"That's very sweet of you, but I can manage with what I have. I can't take on tracking another person, though." Or my favorite, "I am too sore to have a shirt on for more than a couple of hours."

IndyGal35

My best advice for everyone having TE placement and/or a type of LNB at the time of surgery is to request PT immediately, even if you don't think you need it. I think that I let myself suffer too long under the impression that I was just having post-surgical pain. Within 3 PT sessions, my range of motion has improved, and we are finally (literally) digging into the painful cording and scar tissue.

If you aren't having rads after TE's and have the time, do your fills slowly. Ask the PS to give you small volumes and a week or two of rest between.

Has anyone received a visit from Aunt Flo yet? (I haven't at 11 weeks PFC.) I saw the reproductive endo today, and one of my ovaries is still shut down. They'll check again in 3-6 months to see if my OAR changes. If not, we'll proceed with the oophetectomy. It's a tough decision since I'm 35 and ER/PR+. I always figured we had several years left to have kids. Our adoption plans fell through, and I'm not sure if we want that heartache again. I'll be in my late 30's by the time my MO said that I can stop estrogen blockers for a year if desired, and I'm not interested in IVF. It's not looking good for natural conception so far.

ThePrincess

Ladies- Ok - I'm looking at booking a flight/trip 3 weeks after lumpectomy - he will be taking the lymph node w/the clip - the main nurse there thinks that will be fine for scheduling a flight?

MRI and ultrasound this week show no evidence of the tumor / cancer - all we can see right now is the clips - so he expects the surgery to not be super invasive?

Thoughts?

slothabouttown

I think I would've been up for a trip three weeks after my mx. I remember feeling pretty much normal on day 10 and got my drains out after 14 days ( not sure if you'll have those in your case.) I would talk to the surgeon about getting fitted for a sleeve to wear when flying . My BS had me get fitted before surgery so they could get better measurements and a baseline to watch for LE.

Oops editing since I see you're having just one node removed, you might not even need a sleeve! Hope it's a trip for fun and not work !!

ksusan

Even one node removed is an LE risk factor. Number of nodes doesn't seem to matter.

eheinrich

Hi ladies

Just checking in. All is well I guess. They did fat grafting which makes me feel like I have the worst cramps ever - despite no period since April.

Everything hurts

shaz101

Eileen, im so happy to hear from you. I'm sorry you're in pain. Can they give you more ends?

shaz101

OK, my visitors have just left. So here is what he said

"My brother had tongue cancer and did chemo and was given the all clear. 10 months later the cancer was everywhere and he passed away"

One of my neighbour's came over just now to borrow something and told me about his wife and neighbor who both died of cancer in the last few years!

Fuck! I REALLY DON'T WANT TO HEAR THIS RIGHT NOW

Jackbirdie

Eileen- I'm glad you're home...you are home, right? I'm so sorry you're in pain, take whatever you have access to to stay ahead of it....hugs...thinking of you.

Jackbirdie

Sharon- that is just not right. Wtf is the matter with people?

They open their mouths and their brains fall out!

Hope you recover your post- guest serenity soon!

shaz101

Thanks katy, I'm frazzled. Shouldn't you be asleep?

Jackbirdie

yes, I should be asleep. Just sent you a pm. Been having a bit of trouble, and it's affecting my sleep.

Had a bit of a better day today, went to yoga, did some quilting, errands, stuff....but here I am awake again. Not crying this time though.

shaz101

I'm glad you've had a better day. Chat to you soon

Look... I have hair

Trvler

Awesome on the hair, Sharon! I have begun to believe it is our responsibility to say the following in response to those comments:

"Yeah, I don't really want to hear about people you know who died of cancer'. It shuts them right down, lets them know they are idiots and possibly (hopefully) saves some poor future cancer patient hearing that shi$.

Carrie37

Eileen, thinking of you! I feel your pain and it sucks! Hang in there!

Allison, I cannot even believe your SIL! You don't need any extra stress before your surgery. It would be great if your husband would say something. When in your surgery and when do you leave?

Sharon, as I read your post I though of how maybe some people need to read a sign on our front doors. Something's like: "Welcome! I am so happy you have come to visit. Please refrain from sharing your stories of relatives/friends who have died of cancer or even have had a recurrence. I recently kicked cancer's ASS and would like to remain in Happy Town as long as possible. Thank you for your thoughtfulness."

Katy, I feel like I missed a page (or several). I hope everything is okay for you.

I follow two different young women going through cancer treatment on Facebook. They have started a thing called Sisters of the Traveling Pink Wig (or something similar) and it, of course, immediately made me think of you all and our bracelet!

I am nervous about going to the BS today. She told my family after my surgery that I was "cancer free." Then when she talked with me she mentioned the concern with the marker and how she removed more lymph nodes. She never said the words "cancer free" to me. Maybe she will today?!All I can think about is how she is going to tell me I am not 100% cancer free and I will need to discuss with my MO. I am sure it won't be bad news but there is that little voice in the back of my mind. Damn cancer.

Trvler

I got the thing worked out with my caregiver. I called my lovely wonderful old sitter from when I had my second c-section. She has two daughters who are about 2 and 6 and her mother is here from Poland. She is looking for her first teaching job after spending several years going back for her credential. Since she isn't working, I gave it a shot. She said yes! She is going to come when school lets out, stay the night, get them ready and send them off in the morning and then go home and come back. I am thrilled. She offered to do it for free. ( I will pay her though). My niece wants to get paid. So I wanted to see how my husband reacted because if the tried to say no, I was going to be livid. He was thrilled too. Then I overheard him talking to his mom last night and he was really upset with his sister. REALLY upset. I am just going to tell the niece my old caregiver is going to come and now she is available the whole time and for consistency, I am just going to use here. Not true but I am at the point where I don't care.

greenae

Eileen

I hope you feel better soon! Take ur meds on schedule and try sitting upright as much as possible. Recliner and pillows helped me a lot.

Hugs

Arlene

Trvler

Eileen, take those pain meds!

slothabouttown

Eileen,

Happy to wake up to your post, ditto what the team said about taking your pain meds and taking it easy.

Yesterday I was in the back yard and my neighbor came out, I hadn't seen her out in a few months and she started up with some small talk. Shortly she said, "so what's with your hair?" Now I'm one of the private ones about this, co-workers and a few friends are all I've told about my BC. so I said something about it being summer and easier to style or something ridiculous having been caught off guard by the question.

She just stared at me and said, "really? Because we got some of your mail at our house one day" (assuming a hospital bill.) Now what?! I wasn't fooling the nosey neighbor huh? I just told her I was fine now, gave her some tomatoes and high tailed it into the house. I was frustrated that she made me feel stupid for not telling the truth. It wasn't even that it's a secret anymore, it's more about how comments and questions like that throw me off guard when I'm just living life and someone wants to bring up cancer. just like those inappropriate stories, ugh please.

Trvler

Geez. Did she OPEN the bill?

Carrie37

I was thinking the same thing Allison! What did she do with the mail? How rude to bring it up to you in any event. If you want her to know, you would tell her.

Leighrh

Sloth.. I def would have said... well that's really none of your business is it?.. LOL

Question for you ladies who have finished up chemo.. which is everyone but me I believe Did you bring treats to the nurses on your last go round? my Center is pretty big.. I have had nurses more than once but on the floor there are prob 10 or more nurses and that many techs or assistants..... Should I just bring a whole lot of something and leave it at the front for everyone? I just hate to leave ppl out if I bring treats.