Infected Port & Angry Onc?

DoggieBytes

Hello All,

I am at a loss as what to do.  After making it through A/C and feeling really positive about having accomplished the last push of adriamycin with out even a single tear, my port decided to get badly infected.

This sent me into a real emotional tail spin, had a crying melt down at the Oncs office when he said it's gotta come out fast.  I was afraid but knew it wasn't his fault in any way I was just afraid because the infection got bad really fast.

My surgeon got me scheduled into surgery quickly, got me on powerful antibiotics, it was staph, and she delayed my taxol a couple of weeks.

I let my Oncs secretary know I was healing well and after 2nd week of rest I should be back on track per my surgeon (who referred me to the Onc). My Oncs secretary was happy to hear that and said she would let my Onc know.  

Two days later I get a call from his office asking me to come in to meet with him, unexpected.

I wasn't sure what was up. Went in and he was very agitated and wanted to know if I wanted to start chemo that week.  I said no because my surgeon said to wait, he said that didn't matter and continued to question me.  I was stuck in the middle and didn't understand why he was doing this to me.

Last week I was there for my chemo, like I was supposed to be, on time, and he again brought it up and basically accused me of lying about my surgeons instructions.  My surgeon did claim she had advised him of her decision.

Now I feel he is treating me as though I am being adversarial.

I've been crying all week, this on top of the stress of cancer, I've been a good patient.  What have I done wrong?  

Has anyone ever had a conflict like this?

I've been reaching out for help but haven't had any luck, most people tell me to just suck it up and not say anything.

I guess getting cancer doesn't give you a get away from poor treatment by professionals pass.

. .

MusicLover

It sounds like you are past the conflict part, I mean that you are back on chemo, correct?  So the issue is your onc's attitude then, right?  I would be upset too.  I have had attitude problems with my onc, also, but I think that he is very good at what he does so I look beyond it.  I think I have figured out his personality well enough now and our relationship is working.  I wouldn't bring the topic of your infection up again unless you really need to and if that doesn't improve things then maybe you will need to speak to someone to have your onc changed.  Document the problems you have had with him well before you ask for a change.  This of course is assuming that there is more than one onc. available where you are being treated.  I do feel that things will probably improve with your onc. and you will not have to request a change in doctors. 

You haven't done anything wrong, so don't think or act like you have.  It is best not to blame yourself for flaws in other people's personalities but why live with it if he continues to upset you.

DoggieBytes

I haven't brought up the infected port or complained to him about in any way.  He's been the only one initiating it as an issue.

I was upset the day he said it had to come out but never said anything to him negative except I was scared of having this complication, after that I was focused on getting the infection cleared up and taking care of the large open wound I had in my chest.  It had to be left open to drain.

I was there for my chemo, yes, got my first taxol treatment and he brought it back up, not me.  

Before the port problem he and I got along great I had nothing but positive interactions. I thought we had a good understanding of the game plan and communicated just fine.  After the port problem he did a 180.  It's like which Dr. am I going to see today.

He does work in an office with other Oncologists but I am told they don't like it when a patient wants to switch, so I'm wondering if any one has done that and how it worked out?

208sandy

Seems to me your onc believes that you complained to the surgeon about him - you didn't - so not your fault - I would be tempted to dump this guy - his ego seems to be in the way of his treating you - I would guess that he would take it very badly if you asked to see someone else in his practice - is there another cancer clinic in your area?  If not, I guess you are going to have to :"suck it up" but honestly that is something I could never do so I hate to give you that advice.  Keeping you in my thoughts, S.

WinningSoFar

Perhaps you could tell your onc directly or indirectly that you are upset that he seems upset with you.  Perhaps all this is miscommunication between the two of you, where he is upset about something (not you at all).  It can't be the first time that a patient and doctor had miscommunicated. 

Kicks

I'm not understanding! 

You didn't call your Chemo Dr when something came up?   What did Surgeon do? Remove it?

I am sorry but am not sure what you are saying.  It is for us to be our own best advocate, so have to be sure our questions are answered.

DoggieBytes

@kicks, yes you misunderstand.  I noticed the port was red while at the chemo clinic.  I brought it to my Oncs attention immediately, even with the immediate start of antibiotics  my Onc prescribed the infection took off. He was involved and aware.

He referred me back to my surgeon to have it removed and I followed his instructions.  My surgeon put me on stronger antibiotics.  He and my surgeon agreed it needed to be removed and my surgeon performed the operation.

Anyhow the problem was when my surgeon instructed both myself and my Onc that due to the infection and the size of the wound my chemo had to be temporarily delayed.  Giving chemo while I had a pretty serious staph infection and open draining wound was a strong concern of my surgeon, because as we know chemo prevents healing and also knocks down the immune system.  That's when things got weird with my Onc, when my surgeon delayed resuming chemo for 2 weeks.  

I did ask my Onc if the delay would affect my chemo outcome and he said no.  

In general:

I think there's something up between those two and probably my Onc didn't agree with my surgeon on the delay and I'm stuck in the middle somehow, it was not my call, but I caught the guff from him.

If I were dealing with a flu or minor surgery this wouldn't even be a big deal because it's not a long term relationship curing and managing a serious disease that has already created so much long term stress.  On top of the complication that with no port I have to get Taxol via an I.V. In my arm and that's riskier, veins may not hold up.  :-((. I really could do without the Doc Drama.  I feel like shaking him by the shoulders and say "Hello, already stressed out cancer patient here".

I'll tell him, nicely, I've been a compliant patient and I just want to get my treatments done before the stress of all this over whelms me.  I hope after this we will work together as we were.

Thank you 208Sandy for understanding.

Thank you all for reading, your input thus far and I wish all of you as smooth as possible a journey through treatment and healing.

Best

D.B.

tangandchris

Yeah, this sounds like an issue between the doc's to me. They are supposed to be communicating about you and your case with each other. I'm sorry that you are in the middle of this and your MO should not be treating you like that. I agree that IF you decide to switch MO's you'd probably be better of going to a different clinic. Otherwise you will have to "deal", but I wouldn't like it either.

Even doctors can have a bad day too, but if it is a continual issue I'd switch. ((hugs))

Holeinone

Doggie, congrats on making it through A/C......that is a huge accomplishment, in my humble opinion. I did, thought it was torture.. Whatever your MO is upset about, being one upped by the surgeon, or a difference of opinion, none of this is your fault. You did not ask/want the stinkin infection. It happens. 

Changing MO in the middle of treatment will just slow it down, which has already happened with the staph. I hope for you that things progress without any more delay. Would be difficult to stay on schedule, while changing Dr. or centers now. 

dlb823

You'll be following up with your onc for at least 5 years, so I would absolutely make an attempt at clearing the air with him -- maybe not right now, but one of the next times you see him.  Docs are human, and occasionally they're just in a bad mood b'cuz of something unrelated to you -- either professional or personal -- and they take it out on you because your situation also stresses them out.  I would let some time go by and then ask him why he was so angry, because at the time it was very upsetting to you.  If he doesn't have a reasonable explanation, I would dump him and do your follow up with someone with whom you won't be walking on eggshells each time you have to ask a question or even disagree with him about something.  

And as far as not doing chemo with an open wound... I'm shocked that your onc would have even for one moment considered giving you chemo if you had an unhealed wound.  Just my two cents worth...    (((Hugs)))  Deanna

DEbeachgirl

I've had 4 oncologists. If he continues treating you w hostility then you need to start getting recommendations for another practice. It's about YOU and if you aren't comfortable go find someone who will make you comfortable. I did bc I wasn't going to let someone treat me badly. It doesn't matter if he's a doctor.