Just had the C word applied to me

LoriGirlTexas

I just found out the day after my 49th birthday (8/20/14) that I have a malignant mass with poor differentiation (sp?) of cells. I've been numb and in limbo for the last 18 hours, waiting for my pathology report, which seems to be in cyberspace somewhere, to be read by someone who is to tell me what kind of malignancy I have. It is in my left breast, and all I know is it seems huge, easily over 4cm. It grew very rapidly over the last few months. I've made my peace in many areas in my life, but am finding the testing and the waiting is hardly bearable.  

Cancer. In my breast. I am HATING the vulnerability of it all more than anything.

Lissee

Hang in there Lori. The mind does horrible, and sometimes unnecessary things to us.  I was 45 when I was diagnosed. (50 now) Make sure you find your voice, and get the answers you need from the healthcare professionals who are treating you.  If you don't keep asking until someone hears you.  I hope you have someone to lean on.... its makes a world of difference.

Take good care of your body, mind and soul... You will need all three to get through this difficult journey

lissee

Moderators

Dear LoriGirlTexas, we are sorry for your findings but hold out for the pathology report as it may not be as bad as you think. We know how the mind jumps to 'worst case', which is often not the case. Waiting is the worst time and everyone on here has been through the dreaded wait anmd sympathises. Take a deep breath and try to calm yourself.

Read from quality sources as there is a lot of bad advice/information out there on the web, so steer clear of that. We are thinking of you at this breadful period but once you get the path report and talk with your Doctor, you can take 'control' again where now you are probably feeling powerless. It is frightening and you have our sympathy.

The Mods

vbishop

Hi Lori -

So sorry you have found yourself here....but its a great place for advice, an ear, a shoulder to cry on, a safe place to vent, and a great place to receive support and encouragement from those that have come before you.

Where are you in TX?  There are several of us in Central TX that hook up in the "help me get through this" forum, Texas Hill Country Warriors thread.  We are all ages and all stages, we meet about once a quarter, we are hoping to do a girl's weekend next spring when most of our ladies should be done with chemo and/or radiation.  We are a fun bunch...but also a very very supportive and upbeat group.

Please stop by in and say hi.  We are all here for you, wishing you well, praying for the best.

Hang in there.....and let us know how we can help!

happygran

It's a really hard time for you right now..........I'm over 6 years out with a large tumour, grade 3 and lymph nodes positive...............it's scary..............but you can get through this.......If I can do it, anyone can....

I know when I was first dx, I planned my funeral, but I'm still here over 6 years on............enjoying life & you will too.

Get your treatment plan, do it, and you'll be out the other side.........not easy, but do-able..........

Take care

mdg

So sorry you have joined our party Lori.  My heart goes out to you.  The beginning is the hardest part of all of this....I hate hearing anyone else has to start this journey.  Once you have the pathology and a treatment plan somehow it gets a little easier.  I am your age and got the C word applied to me almost 4 years ago.  Life has gone on and is back to normal again.  It will take time...you can get through this and there will be many of us here to help support you along the way.  Hugs!!!

Bubu

Dear Lori

I'm sorry to hear about your diagnosis. I was recently diagnosed as well (8/1/14). I understand how you are feeling.  The first 48 hours was difficult, I couldn't focus on anything else but the bad news.  And slowly, from talking to people, it helped ease my concern, and you will too.   You will notice that many many women had gone through this and you are not alone.  A friend of mine recommended a book by Dr. John Link "Survival Guide for Breast Cancer", it helped me understand my diagnose because the unknown is the scariest thing.  In the beginning of the stage, I find information is key.  I hope you will get through this, and please, come to this board often, there are many many nice people here ready to support you, as they have with me. 

Take good care.