new club mbr

Justneedinfo

so I was handed a packet on wed with dx. Been reading thru stuff and reading thru this board. I find it funny but not really that I was told I'm too young at 35 but there's a link for honoring our young mbrs and it's for anyone dx under 35 so I not sure now if I'm that young. But just wanted to say hi and if anyone has any tips for me. Single mom daughter is 2 and I'm a full time bartender....was planning going back to school so I can have a better job for my future and ironically I was going to finish up sonography so I guess I got a crash course in reading my own. Not sure how I'm supposed to work or go to school anymore while taking care of her. Any thoughts from those who've been doing this?

Moderators

Justneedinfo, we're sorry you have to face all this on your own... Just wanted to say that we hear you, and that you're not alone in this great community. 

You are welcome to private message us with your story and picture if you want us featuring you as one of our young members. Editorial team is working on that now, not sure if we are still on time but worth trying, your story will help encourage future young women facing breast cancer also. 

On another topic, there is a new section on the main Breastcancer.org site that may help you in these difficult moments right after being diagnosed. It's called Breast Cancer 101, and it's designed to help those newly diagnosed sort through all of the information on our site to find what is more relevant right now.

We hope this helps.

The Mods

Racy

do you have details of your diagnosis/pathology? That would help others with similar diagnosis to connect with you and share tips.

This is a great place once you get to know us.

Please keep in touch for information, support and friendship.

Anonymous

Justneedinfo:

I feel your pain.  I had a similar diagnosis, was age 46, and was also a single Mother (though my child was already in Jr. High and did not have developmental challenges--I know those are BIG differences). I did have siblings living near the same city where I live, but they did not help me. So, while I cannot begin to know how difficult this has been for you--I do know that you'll get through it.  Because we do what we have to do to get through the day. So now, you don't "just need info," you need some tlc.

I also worked full time.  I had my own business so there were NO "sick days"  (I had no other employees). But I had to take time off, there was no choice.  Myclients were very understanding, so I was inordinately lucky.  I ended up missing Wed-Fri only for my mastectomy, and the same time for chemo (I quit chemo after 1 treatment). I have to pay for my own private health insurance-still do-and I had no prescription coverage.  Before that--I didn't miss anymore more except for appointments (MRIs, biopsies, etc.). With surgery-I missed only one of my daughter's events (a band concert).  Chemo was harder because I have a VERY weak stomach. I could eat only a few things, and my daughter was no help (yes, I know, she SHOULD have been by that age but I hadn't taught her any cooking-I asked if she could just make me some rice once and it was inedible-not done-heehee).

But now, it's 8 years later an my daughter just graduated college and, guess what, I did too!  (OK, I actually have about 2 assignments left this summer).  So I wish I could be there to give you a hug. I'm sure your Mom will do everything she can.  Hopefully social workers can help you answer any other concerns you might have. So you'll get through it as you have so far with that wonderful baby--one day at a time.  

Hugs and best to you.

christina0001

Welcome, justneedinfo. I'm sure you are still reeling from being diagnosed. I was diagnosed at 32. I didn't have a child and I am sure that makes a huge difference, but I continued to work full time and go to grad school during treatments and surgeries. So don't automatically assume that you have to put your plans on hold. It's a very personal choice. I personally benefitted from having the work and school as a distraction. And while treatments are no walk in the park, I think it's much easier for us than for ladies who are significantly older, maybe not as active or in as good of shape, and may have other health issues too.

I will give one bit of advice: now is the time to allow yourself to accept help from family and friends. If someone offers help with childcare, housework, driving you to medical appointments, accept it! Do what you have to do to get through this. Remember that it will not last forever. When I was first diagnosed, I was so overwhelmed with all that had to be done. But as with all things in life, it all comes to pass. Life is very sweet on the other side.

Terri1975

have you scheduled surgery yet?